what is your day like with your almost 3 year old when they don't go to nursery or preschool?

[cyphercat]

I'm just gettting a bit depressed about how DD spends her day. She has become addicted to TV and just will watch it all day if she can. This only happened due to my tiredness from being pregnant and now having tiny baby to look after. She has huge tantrums when asked to switch TV off. here is her normal routine at the moment as we are stuck indoors.

6:15am - wake up, TV for DD1, me making breakfast for her and then breastfeeding DD2 and then me dozing on sofa as I don't get much sleep..

9:00am - do something arty, painting or drawing and printing something off from computer, making stuff

10:00am - snack time and she potters off and do stuff on her own and then we might do playdough..

12:00 am - lunch and TV

1:30am - play games or do puzzles

3:00am - snack and TV again

5:00pm - dinner, then bath

6:30 pm - stories and bed by 7:30pm

So she watches at least 5 hours of TV a day!!! If anybody could give me some other ideas and what I can do to entertain her, I would appreciate very much.

11

Wrap up and go for a walk. Even the shortest distance takes ages with a toddler, and you'll all feel better for it. I used to walk to a bench to watch the cars/lorries/buses with a carton of juice.

But I personally don't worry about how much TV they watch, so long as they are doing a good mix of stuff, which it sounds like she is.

I try to avoid putting the TV on before breakfast though, it makes getting washed and dressed and fed a battle as I have to tear them away from it - I save it for when they are up and doing to encourage them to get on with it! But whatever works for you.

And it does get easier once you're over the night feeds.

I was just going to bob on and say, in a word, shit. But that's not very constructive is it?I think your routine sounds alright, at least you're trying to do stuff other than tv. (I guess if you weren't stuck indoors it would be easier, how old is DD2?)

Play groups

Going the park

Going the shops

Visiting others

Going the library

I would make it your aim to get out for an hour or so each day.

The weather is getting nicer now so more oppurtunity.

It is tedious - I have been there.

If she is 3 can you not make use of the 12.5 hours of free nursery per week?

When I had a toddler and a newborn I used to pack them in the car and just go for a drive. I would often feed the toddler sandwiches for lunch, saving the mess of another meal. It was great to know that ds wasn't going to run off or make a mess

Going out every day saved my sanity.

Blowing up an entire packet of balloons and asking a friend round worked quite well too, as long as you didn't do it too often.

Break the routine and enforce the new routine you want. She will be nightmare-ish for a week, but I guarantee she will get used to the new routine more quickly than you could have hoped if you are firm about it. if she is really bad, unplug the TV and say it's broken, or remove it.

I feel your pain by the way! TV was my babysitter when pregnant with a toddler, too . I also found the age of 2/3 yrs old the hardest in terms of entertaining them. My Ds is 5 now and it's much easier at this age.

I used to have an outing in the morning and another in the afternoon. 'Outing' could mean the park, library, a short bus ride just for the sake of it, the supermarket, a visit to a friend - anything that would kill an hour and get us out of the house, really.

Then I would set a 'quiet' activity for that deadly bit of the afternoon before tea time. Painting, baking, crafts, some times it would just be completely made up bollarks (ooh, I know, let's have a bath!' etc

You have to be creative.

It's worth it I find, though. Loads of TV puts them in a cranky mood in my experience.
Save cartoons or special DVDs for the bit of the day when you really need them to sir down and be quiet (ie. when cookig dinner, getting baby ready for bed or whatever) and save telly days for when you areill or just cannot be arsed.

Sticker books go down really well with my DD (now 3.5). She'll do those for hours while I'm breastfeeding DS (9 weeks).

Do you have any friends you can invite over? We have lots of "playdates" with friends and a total TV ban when people are over, so that helps. Also we go to other people's houses which makes it easier with DS (better to breastfeed in a warm house than a freezing cold playground).

I also forked out for loads of crafty stuff so she does collages and drawing etc.

I get her to help out when i change DS's nappy - she loves showing him toys (i gave her a box of her old baby toys and said she could choose some to lend to him if she liked, and she loves doing that).

She helps bath him.

While he naps we do cooking (easy things like muffins or cookies).

But we also get out and about as much as we can, see people, go to starbucks for babycino (they are free!), go to the supermarket etc.

On the 2 days DC doesn't go to nursery our day is

7ish get up and have breakfast

7.30 get dressed

7.45 - 8.45 free play - occassionaly tv on, whilst I do chores

8.45-11.45 out and about friends for coffee, toddler group, local pre-school activity ie gym/music/surestart

12ish lunch time

12.30 30 minutes quiet time with tv on - has to sit quietly on the sofa - no charging about

1 - 2.30 another local group, visit other friends, pop into town, library, walk to the shop, nature walk

2.30 - 4 free play in the garden/lounge

4.30 quiet time - sometimes have tv on whilst I prep tea, or free play whilst I prep tea.

5.30 tea time

6 bath time

6.30 30 minutes tv time

7 bed.

plasticine
i can feed dd with one hand while making mickey mouse wih the other
but ds also watches far too much, cutting down now

andds gets up about 5.15/5.30

thank you for all the ideas. DD2 is just a week old hence the reason we are stuck indoors and I feel it's too cold to go out with tiny fragile one and I don't drive yet (hopefully by summer, I will). But plenty of great ideas and I'm going to order bulk arty crafty stuff tonight as DD1 is acting up more than usuall as well. Getting dressed in the morning is good thing so I'll start doing that. I guess inviting one friend over isn't a bad idea at all....dreading the cleanup afterwards though..

I agree that loads of TV does put her in a horrid mood.

Oh cyphercat you wrote my post!

My DS nearly 3 and since end of PG to now (12 week old DD) It's gone from me and DS being really close and doing loads together and TV was only on an hour in the morning to pretty much what you are saying.

I don't even do as much playing as you as DD has reflux and takes up all of my time.

My poor DS has gone from happy, confident and really funny to the child who gets all the dirty look from other mums when we are out.

Today at Rhyme Time I was BF DD and DS started hitting a roughly 10 month old baby bay for no reason . Unheard of before DD. His mum yanked DS away by the hand and gave him a row before I could wedge DD off boob and climb people to get to him. Mortified. I just want to say - he wasn't like this, he is the lovliest little boy normally.

Hopefully we will get back to normal.....in about 6 months!!

I would say if your dd2 is only a week old, you're being hard on yourself!

It's a huge change going from one child to two, life with a baby and toddler takes some getting used to. While the baby is so young, don't worry too much about activities or watching too much tv. It sounds like your older dd is doing other stuff too and as you're sleep deprived, sometimes needs must. It will pass - the weather will get better, the sleep will get better etc. Once you're feeling a bit more human you can get out more - nothing special just things other people have suggested - the park, shops, library, for a walk, toddler groups, see a friend. If you're worried about too much tv, decide how much is reasonable for her to watch and stick to it - she will soon get used to it. Maybe a tv session in the morning and one on in the afternoon. Or decide together the programmes she is going to watch and then turn it off.

5 hours a day is way too much, but you know that, don't you. She's probably acting up partly through boredom as well. So, ideas for filling your day:

Get outside every day - 1 week isn't too young to be out. Get the baby in a sling and they'll be plenty warm enough.
Park
Library - lots do Storytime or similar activities.
Just having a walk - get her to pick up "interesting things" to make a collage with when you get home.
sticking/playdough/drawing - all the stuff you're already doing.

It'll all get better sooner than you can imagine. Make sure you see people every day and don't worry about clearing up the mess.

magic box - cut a hole in the top of a box ( bottom completely open) wide enough to get a small person arm in- i made one for mine, put a load of her existing toys, bricks, spoons, anything inside - 'what's in the magic box' seriously entertains her for ages - even after she discovered she can lift it up and see what's inside anyway - bless! I did it having had ENOUGH!!!!!! OF DDDDDD..DD...DORA. I feel your pain, cold turkey, switch it off, turn it into a treat, take the pain for a couple of days and you'll be right back on your routine, not theirs. Worth it - mine bellowed, but once the washing up bowl with bubbles in and the magic box came out, Dora was no more! RIP

Try and have one out of the house activity each day. It can even be something simple like a walk to the corner shop to get a pint of milk or choose some ham or cheese for lunchtime sandwich. Some days this could be a toddler group or similar.

If you have a 1 week old you are imo actually doing very well.

I try and turn craft sessions into something useful, so we do stuff like make cakes or fruit salad. Easy cakes, not stuff that needs cooling down and icing and lots of effort. At least then there is something to show for all of the mess!

When dd2 was tiny I used to try and have one to one time with dd1. e.g. if dh was home I would leave the baby (who was bf) for just half an hour. Take dd1 out for sandwich/snack in supermarket cafe which kind of helped me as lunch was then sorted.

Do you have a garden? I let the dds play in the garden and I do tasks in the kitchen. I keep my coat on as it's freezing with the door open.

They have a picnic - just a snack of raisins or something which they love. Also a 2/3 year old can trundle round with a dolly in a pram or similar.

erm you've just had a baby a week ago !! Don't worry about it. Don't think I was quite walking well enough to go out much after giving birth

I do think dvds are better than telly though, if you're worried about content the baby einstein ones are really good for 2-3yrs, bit more educational. My DS kicks off big time initially when the tv goes off but soon settles dowwn to play. Just ignore them :O

At the moment he plays cooking with a wooden spoon and bowl.

And flute with a wrapping paper tube. Stick some music on and that might entertain for a while

Don't worry ! You're doing great

Don't worry, you have just had a baby! In a week or two though, look up your local surestart for loads of free activities. They usually have a website.

When DD2 was just born (although I did have family help) DD1 did a lot of playdough, cutting and sticking, baking (she will happily knead bread dough for ages, also if you choose a recipe that needs, say, raisins, she might put each one in individually if you are lucky!)

I find the cbeebies website a good compromise if DD1 is watching too much tv (which she does, it is far too tempting when you are exhausted) as she can play games on there and at least she is interacting. Maybe try tv based activities- ie cook what they did on I can cook (or cook anything while wearing a pinny, which is enough to convince my only just 3yo that I am Katy ) or pretend to be Mr Maker.

DD1's typical day if we stay in(she turned 3 last week and has a 4mo sister)

7.30/8am ish Wake up, shout for mummy or daddy. Have breakfast, either at the kitchen table or moan at parents until they give in and let you watch cbeebies.

9/10am ish start an activity such as painting or a puzzle book.

11am help make lunch

Midday eat lunch

12.30pm go for a nap or have quiet time in bedroom reading or listening to music

2pm Get up, have drink and a snack.

2.30pm Bake or do dancing (ie put music on and run about like a loon until Mummy gives up- usually two songs in) or maybe get wrapped up and chucked into the garden for a bit. Mummy might make a half hearted attempt to get you to tidy your room or something

4pm Grandad kidnaps you at about this time to go to his house while Mummy does housework (mn)

5pm back home for tea
6pm bath every other night, hot chocolate, story (or bedtime story on cbeebies if Mummy is tired) cuddle and bed by 7.30 or earlier if Mummy thinks you look tired.

My DD has just turned 4 but my thought is more out of the house activity.

It is a long day to fill otherwise.

Frees activities eg library rhyme time (i'm sure most libraries have something),

Paid activity wise but not too costly DD used to enjoy a music class in a a local church (not a franchised one). Lots of mums came with a baby in a car seat aswell.

Also at 3 they can do some activies with minimal input meaning you can sit on the sidelines and have a rest with baby 2 eg Ducklings swimming classes usually take from 3 or some dance classes eg ballet.

Out of the house wise, we have a season ticket to a local children's book museum, although there are actually plenty of free museums too. Most art galleries, libraries and museums have a children's activity programme-check out the websites.

Whereabouts are you?

DD1 also loves to do her dancing lesson, go for walks round parks (and a go on the playground after!), look in toy shops (although I always end up buying her a treat) and go to places like the city farm and the "big river" (ie the Tyne).

Try surestart and the notice boards of any local churches and community centres to find playgroups. My DD1 will quite happily run about while I supervise now she is one of the older ones, although I do occasionally rope in various relatives to come along so that I can run about and have a go on the bouncy castle

My dd is 2y 10m, she watches more tv than I would like too,and although it isn't as much as yours I don't have a new baby ! it is partly due to the fact that I am knackered,partly due to her older sister wanting to watch tv when she comes in from school and is tired,and partly habit. Some days she watches hardly any and I do much prefer that for all of us,sometimes i have her in the garden for quite a while,she will potter about digging and watering while I prune etc,sometimes I take her out for a walk or to the swings,we bake or play with her toy cooker,if offered anything exciting she does want to do that rather than tv and left to choose she gets fed up with the tv and goes to do something else.I am trying to limit it to her favourite couple of programmes.

At one week old thats fine!!!
Wind down the tv time gradually a little each day and by the time you feel up to going out, it will all feel a little less stressful and there will be less tantrums at turning the tv off etc
YOu sound like you are doing great if your baby is a week old