Does anyone enjoy parenting more and more and have childcare less and less?

[justlookatthatbooty]

With first DC I couldn't wait for my 'me' time,and 'couldn't survive' without 2 days childcare a week at least. Now with 2 DC's I'm getting more and more into it, leaving my ego maniac self behind (just a little!) and quitting the childcare a little more by the week. (still love a cleaner to come every day though!) It's like I am realising more and more by the week how precious these days, weeks, months of their/our family lives are. Interesting process. (though I still have my moments can assure you) Takes the totally knackered and overwhelmed edge off the whole lack of sleep/time for self thing. Anyone else have a similar story? I'm kind of surprised and fascinated by it.

Ooh Riven. Well done you. x

Well, my ds is nearly 7.
he was a complete and utter awful,hellish, shoccking nightmare as a baby, toddler and small person.
It was like a huge kick in the tits when he arrived, no one and nothing could have prepared me for the daily living torture that parenting was for me.

No help with him either, it was me and dh.

Fast forward to now and he is a joy, i feel back to normal, back to me and child care now is much easier.

I made the BIG decision that we would not have any more children as i just could not face putting myself through the whole thing ever again.

Now we are trying for number 2

Yes.

When mine were very little I really felt that I needed time away occasionally and we'd go away over night for breaks etc and out for dinner.

But since they got over the age of 4yrs, I think I've i) realised that precious time is passing and I need to cling on to every moment and ii) realised that it is just as enjoyable and relaxing being with them.

We now never go away without them, as I know that they will enjoy doing everything we enjoy (eating out sight seeing etc), i don't feel they curtail my enjoyment in the way I used to feel.

I enjoy my children more and more each year.

I guess I'm not a baby stage person. I did love them being babies but definitely needed time out from it in a way that i don't now.

I think I am unusual in this on MN as alot of people see loath to leave their babies. I left my baby with relief, but cannot bear to leave my 6 and 9yr olds.

meatntattypie I could have written your post word for word about DS1. He was a nightmare baby but turned into a scrummy toddler (he is 8 now).

We were adamant that we would not have anymore but like you changed our mind. DS2 was the easiest baby ever.

I hated being a mum at first but now love it.

Hang on a minute Riven. Do you mean you did home schooling? How did you find it? I guess that's too big a question.

Just seen other posts. REally interesting thanks for your input. my first DS also a nightmare but utterly lovely now so that does help. guess its just such a shock first time round and if youve got a non sleeper etc it's that much easier to throw them in childcare and run. My DD is 7 months and hasn't been with anyone except me and it feels lovely.

Its a big thing to admit to TheCrackfox
But put simply, i had no idea what was coming for me. I have never admitted this to any one in rl.
Ended up on ads, but by then he was 3. Dont know how i stuck it out till then.

I am a very strong person, never suffered from depression or the like in my life.

Friends seemed to do it so easily, thier children slept, were not ill often and behaviour was not a problem to them. I felt that either there was something VERY wrong with me, OR/AND ds.

He is lovely now and we do lots of stuff together as i actually enjoy his little company.

OOOohhh I'm so glad I posted. Meat I can totally totally relate. I"m sorry it was so hard for you well done for getting to where you are now. Riven so excited might come back and pick your brains some time, if you've time that is. thanks all.

Have you seen that we have a whole home ed'ing section on this forum, justlook?

No I didn't know Cory. Where? goes off to look...

No.

I have always hated handing over DD to anyone else - she hardly ever got looked after by anyone but us til she was 13 months and I went back to work.

Still hate handing her over to the c/m (who is lovely, I must say), hate it when PIL take her out for a few hours.

Can't wait til m/l starts in June so I can stop giving her to someone else.

I am beyond at a daily cleaner though.

Hi Ghouls. When you say you hate handing her over what are the feelings at play? Just curious, is there anxiety, or do you just miss her? By the way, I don't actually have a daily cleaner, I just want one!

I just miss her, I don't feel anxious leaving her with the c/m as I know she's in good hands.

I just enjoy spending the day with her.

So nice to find other people who feel the same!

While of course I loved DS a lot from the moment he was born, I found it all a massive shock and struggled hugely with the loss of all my 'me time'. I didn't leave him overnight, but I often used to get DP to have him from the end of one feed till the beginning of the next so I could have a break.

However, the older he gets, the more I love spending time with him. He's got such a great sense of humour (well, as much as an 18 month old can have...) and is just great to be around.

If I could produce one year olds instead of newborns I'd be much more inclined to have lots of children!

I have so many friends that just adore the newborn stage and are finding their children more and more challenging as they get older, so it's nice to see that some people are the opposite.

DS1 was a pretty easy baby and from 8/9months and beyond has been an absolute joy (OK so 4 is proving a little more ) but I was quite happy to be going back to work PT after my year maternity leave mainly because I was getting bored.......fast forward to DS2 who is now 8 months and I'm LOVING being a SAHM and couldn't give a toss about my job and the thought of going back to work in 5 weeks is just horrible - I don't want to leave my babies

So yes, I totally get what you're saying

Great to hear your stories and similar experiences. Le Chat that's exactly where I'm at and am figuring out how little income we need so I can ditch all extraneous work commitments and it's so surprising that i find myself really thrilled at the change. A kind of Big Wow Really Yes feeling. So cool. Never thought I would find myself saying this. Off to post on another subject re gym creche. Loving hearing your stories people, keep them coming.

I find I need to send mine off to my mother's in the holidays less often so I can work from home. They're 11 and 13 and it just feels less difficult. They can make their own lunches (and mine) and go off on the bus to the nearest town.

Much easier!