Controversial - However .... (Boarding School)

[Lifeinagoldfishbowl]

This is a controversial subject - we saw this the other day when the said subject was on tv however here goes.

A friend of mine has 4 children - 2 of which will be in secondary school next academic year, and 2 at primary, as the father is due to be posted (armed forces) they are looking at boarding school for the 2 eldest.

Friend is a SAHM and although the children are obviously at school all day ; she feels this will make her feel redundant; and she will struggle with not being mummy to them 24/7.

So questions

How did you react to the "empty space" that was left when they started boarding school?

How did you cope with having children having different term dates espec as the oldest 2 sill have longer holidays than the younger 2?

Any other thoughts etc would be welcome

Thanks

My eldest went 2 years before her younger sister.

I was a full time SAHM.

There is no doubt a huge void and an empty space. I threw myself into doing even more stuff with my youngest DD2. It really became "empty" when she joined her sister last year.

The school holiday differences were lovely and I always saw it as an advantage. It meant the week or 2 each end of DD2 shorter school holidays I got one to one uber quality time with DD1. Yes we were still tied to school hours but we did stuff together in those hours. It was lovely. I also strongly believe in letting my chilren have some just plain boring home time with nothing much planned - when they are home from BS! I think they need that balance as BS life is very full on. So I never used to panic much about those days/weeks we were committed to staying at home(as opposed to actully going away on holiday etc) whilst DD2 was still in school term.

I have been unable to find a job at all on this current posting so am still at home full time but now with no kids. The downside is the empty void is really felt and days like today are pretty dire (1st day of an empty house after a fab half term). The plus side is I am now free to travel upto see them pretty much whenever and although I will start job hunting again as soon as we move (in a few weeks) I dread the time when I wont be as free to visit - its a catch 22 but the daily structure will be much appreciated when I find a job.

I used to travel up to BS before DD2 went but not as often because I always had to be back for 3pm pick up of DD2. Saying that though I found a good system of having lots of DD2s friends for tea on days it suited me and then called in a few favours for youngest to have tea at a friends now and again so I could stay to watch matches or just visit DD1 at BS.

There is no doubt when you send a child to BS you miss them terribly. But with 2 DC still at home I think your friend will find it relatively easy to keep herself busy. I enjoyed the one to one time with both my DDs in that 2 years one boarded an the other didnt.

Thanks Mum 72

I have been to boarding school myself so while I can tell her the virtues of going it's good to be able to pass on the info from "the other side"