If in the past you were 50/50 about having a third child?

[nomorechoc]

...and you went ahead / didnt go ahead, do you feel that you made the right decision?
obviously if you did go ahead you love your third, but you know what i mean..
Or did you decide not to and wish you had..?
i really cant decide about this

I was desperate for a third. Dh only wanted one child, so a third most certainly wasn't in his plans.

I was so desperate that dh agreed to try. I fell pg in the first month of trying.

I went through a lot of mixed feelings whilst carrying dd3, dh wanted me to abort her because he felt that we'd made the wrong decision. I constantly thought that I'd pushed my luck too far all throughout my pg (two healthy babies, thought I was pushing it trying for a third). Lots of very irrational thoughts and a huge amount of worry over whether we'd done the right thing.

When she was born I was over the moon, as was dh. She was a delightful baby, breastfed like a champ (I had been unable to feed dd's 1 and 2), adored her big sisters and adored her daddy which melted his heart.
There were a few incidents where dh threw things back in my face - one that sticks clearly in my mind was when we were on the way to a family party, I commented to him about dd3 being into everything and tantrumming and that I hoped she'd behave while we were there, he responded "well don't expect me to do anything, you wanted her ...you look after her"
Very unlike him and very very saddening.

Fast forward a good few months and dd3 is now 2 1/2. She is a wonderful wonderful child and I wouldn't swap her for the world. Yes, money's tighter, and yes, there's not as much attention to go around, but I wouldn't change it, not for one second.
In fact, dh said only the other day when watching her do something funny and cute for the 30th time "and to think I didn't want her - I can't imagine life without her".

It's hard and sometimes it's a struggle, and I feel like my headache won't ever go away, but by God she's worth it!!! My little sweetie!

I had been in two minds, but from about 6 months after having #2 became surer and surer that the family was complete.

We had a pregancy scare a couple of months ago and we are both now absolutely definite that we have made the right decision. The thought that I might be pregnant made all the downsides (For us as a family. They wouldn't apply to any one else.)come rushing to the fore. Every so often I have a little reverie about what the family would be like with an extra one, but it's curiosity rather than anything more positive.

So if you can anyway wangle a late period I would thoroughly advise it as a surefire way of making your mind up.

expecting our third... we have 2 lovely boys already. and i was always rather keen on another but felt really blessed with the two, regardless. bloke has adjusted his thinking (but it involved no explicit pressure from me - apart from him prob wanting to please me).

it is something we are all looking forward to hugely and the boys are too.

so... until baby is born all good. trying to juggle three on holidays etc may be another story.

i am always amazed by the number of people who say ' i bet you are wishing for a girl' !! we would be equally as happy either way thank you!

I was. Decision was taken out of my hands and DS3 is now 2yrs 10months .

No regrets once he was born (plenty during pregnancy and doing the school run whilst suffering morning sickness).

nomorechoc, I could have written your post. My DDs are 10 & 8 so would have a big gap. I have always felt that 2 was enough but have recently been getting broody and spend lots of time thinking about having a third.

I am 35 so although I am not ancient, time is creeping on. We can afford a third and we have plenty of room so those are not issues. I do worry that I might be pushing my luck going for a third as my DDs are healthy and have been very easy children! What if something went wrong? Also I have done the sleepless nights and potty training, would I really want to go back to that?

Our lives are very easy now, we can go out for dinner with the girls or go away on fab holidays. Not sure if I want to give that up!

But I worry that I will regret not having another and I am very broody at the moment. Just heard a friend is having number 4 and felt some pangs for a baby!

Really not sure.

We definitely knew we wanted more than one, but weren't sure how many we wanted. I had two very early miscarriages between dc2 and dc3 (hadn't ever miscarried before), and both dh and I realised from our reactions to the mcs that we definitely wanted another child. But it took me over a year to conceive, during which time we were house-hunting for a 4-bedroom house. I remember walking past one of the bedrooms in the house we finally bought thinking "This bedroom may be the guest room" and knowing that I would be gutted if we didn't fill all the rooms.

Yes we definitely made the right decisiion to have no3. And if I were younger and/or richer I would have been pestering dh for no4.

I'm there too. I just feel life gets a little less "back to normal" after each baby. Always thought i'd have 3 but less sure now.

It is surprising to me how many friends say what plonker said (two healthy kids - are you risking your luck trying for a third).

DS is only 17 months and I would definitely want a larger gap (28 mts last time) so too early to worry about it yet! Good luck deciding...

I did not go ahead as dh had made it clear that he really wanted to stop at 2. Also, I had had quite bad health scares in both pregnancies. Am now grateful that I didn't, as both my children have developed a genetic disorder which renders them disabled and in need of a lot of help. Couldn't deal with one more.

Plonker - that's us. DH has agreed to go for a 3rd but only because I want to. He makes it clear he 'doesn't feel the need' for a third child.

I know that the odd comment will be made if and when we have DC3 and I'll find it tough.

I was undecided. So was DH. We veered from yes to no and then to yes again.

Got pregnant straightaway when we decided yes, and spent much of the pregnancy being (privately) rather worried that had made a mistake - felt knackered and was worried about impact on dd and ds1.

ds2 born nearly 6 months ago. He is an absolute joy. Wonderful. Smiley, happy and just perfect. Enthralled by his older siblings, and they are pleased with him. Particularly ds1 which was a surprise.

The age gap: dd was 6 and 2 months when he was born. DS1 was one week shy of 4.

It's all worked out really well. ds2 has slotted brilliantly into the family and our routine. I do still have some concerns that of all of us, dd has had to make more compromises in terms of time with me than ds1, because she is at school, he is only there 2 days a week until September when he goes into reception. BUt 6 months down the line, I am making a conscious effort to spend one on one time with dd whenever possible. Also the older 2 have strengthened their relationships with dh because he has taken over some stuff, like bathtime (while I feed and settle ds2) and is much more hands on at weekends while I see to ds2.

So (sorry long post), the gist of it is that I am so so so relieved that we went for it. This has perhaps been heightened because he was rather ill at 1 month old (all better now), and it put into perspective how loved and wanted he was. Also, as a side issue/result I have been advised against having any more children and I now am making the absolute most of every stage he's going through because having the older 2 means I am well aware that they are young for such a short time, and grow so quickly.

Hello,
I wonder if you decided to go for a third child.
Im in this headspace now, but so worried I might be making a mistake by having one.
We have such great dynamics now, I don't want to ruin it.

@newpup did you decide to have a third or did you stick with 2? I'm trying to decide if I should have a 3rd and it's so hard