Typical day of a newborn?

[Meandacat]

baby due in 5 weeks (ish ) and I have never been near a baby for more than a few hours at a time in my life, so I'm really beginning to wonder what to expect. DH asked "what do babies do all day?" and I had no answer. .

Ok, so I know s/he'll cry, feed and sleep and, I dunno, kick their little legs, and somewhere in between they get hosed down.. sorry, washed & changed... but when, for how long, in what order? For example, if they are sleeping on and off all through the day, what constitutes "bedtime"? Or does that come later?

I can't wait to meet my baby but feel so monumentally clueless and like I'm going to be making this up as I go along.

well, mostly they do exxactly what you think they'll do!

the first day or so s/he may be quite sleepy. this is to lull you into a false sense of security! don't be fooled

in regards to how often they feed and stuff it's quite variable. they might go a couple of hours between feeds, they might want feeding every half an hour, but you can just go with the flow on that.
they sleep a LOT (well, most of them do!) unless you get a naughty one like my second who just liked doing a lot of screaming. mostly for hours on end at night

they don't have any idea about day or night, so they'll behave the same round the clock in regards to feeding, being awake a bit, going to sleep, feeding again, sleeping, being awake a bit etc etc
"bedtime" doesn't come for quite a while, you'll probably find it useful to ahve a moses basket or whatever downstairs in the evenings with you

we all make it up as we go along! don't worry, just follow his/her cues and you can't go too far wrong

Read Gina Ford - she'll tell you what the baby will do.
Had baby 2 last september & am still clueless.
I let the baby dictate feed & sleep times, slept when the baby did and drank loads of water.
Good luck!

oh washing and changing, with my first i used to dress him in little outfits when we got up in the morning, and then change him whenever he puked/dribbled on them

by the third it was babygros all the time, and they were only changed once a day lol./ poor little last-born

really though, they don't get that dirty, but a little wash of their face and hands each morning or evening is nice, and of course you'll be doing nappy area at each change

Gina Ford - that's the Contented Baby lady, yes? SIL told me to buy her book and someone else mentioned her in an antenatal class today. But I'm sensing sarcasm from mrswarthog!

(If your baby doesn't like being in the moses basket, then unless you ssmoke, drink or use meds that make you sleepy, snuggle him/her into bed with you)

READ the Gina Ford book, then (seriously) throw it out.

It will leave you with a vague sense of how the day should go, but nothing to refer back to, which IMHO is ideal, because if something seems not to be working and you have the urge to reread the advice, it probably isn't working and you should discard the advice.

Fed them. Cuddle them. Keep them basically clean. That's it, really. They kind of turn up, preprogrammed, ready to do whatever they feel like, and for at least a couple of months you have to just go with it.

Not really - both mine are GF babies, brilliant feeders, both sleeping through from 6 weeks. BUT I'm someone who works well with instructions whilst having the sense to reinterpret to suit our life. Some things are really useful - the blackout blinds, the idea of routine if you can do it and some are not - I can't feed the baby & get DS from school at the same time so have adapted. Its just one way, mine got used to being put down to sleep at a certain time & woken up to feed at a certain time. Also I had quite big babies - 10lb & 9lb so they do feed & sleep better than wee ones. Follow the baby's cues. And listen to everyone with a smile & a nod then do your own thing!

yes, a little sarcasm on the GF front!

seriously, tclbb is NOT good if you are breastfeeding. which should be done on demand to ensure a good supply and a happy baby.

Well, I'm hoping to breastfeed, so that's interesting to know. Maybe I'll see if the local library has the GF book, read it with a pinch of reality as suggested and then... take the rest of it as it comes.

I've had an easy pregnancy so far.. can't help feeling I'm going to pay for this elsewhere.

When I was pregnant with my little girl I felt exactlty the same as you - I kept thinking, "oh my god, I've never even changed a nappy, I've never done this, that, am clueless about blah blah...". My advice would be above all else to just go with the flow and take help from everywhere you can! Good luck - it's a wonderful time

i honestly think that if you just follow your instincts and your baby's cues you can't go far wrong.

you don't need the stress of trying to follow someone else's routine on top of the general stress of having a new baby.

all they need in the first few weeks is food, warmth, a nice place to sleep and lots and lots and lots of cuddles!

I got completely wound up reading all the expert books out there and my baby not following ANY of them. Wish in some ways I could turn back the clock and just try to relax and enjoy him being so tiny without worrying about routines. Kept hold of my GF book for a while but soon learnt not to use it - but it was helpful to see DS more or less fitted into the basic structure with me just following him.

If baby has colic, don't wait to get a dummy thinking "Oh I really don't want a toddler talking through a dummy" - literally saved my sanity and DS (now 15mo) has it for sleeps only.

Great piece of advice I got which I actually listened to was listen to your baby cry for at least a few seconds before assuming it's hunger and shoving boob or bottle in its mouth, then you'll learnt to differentiate cries.

Don't think DS really had his proper bedtime until he was 3/4months old, would just doze in and out in his moses basket downstairs with us at first, but we did do bathtime and feed at the same time everynight - the bath helped his colic and was the nicest part of the day!

Good luck, don't wish it away....

I just had dd2 3 weeks ago and I had forgotten quite how little newborn babies do. She is a big baby (10lbs 3oz) and has long sleeps

This is her typical day
feed
lie about, maybe asleep
feed some more
lie about, maybe sit in her chair if I put her in it so I can wash
sleep
feed
loll about
feed some more
loll about, maybe drift off to sleep
at some point in the middle of the day she goes into a really deep sleep from which she doesn't wake, even if you change her nappy
feed
feed
maybe look about a little bit
snooze
feed
I give her a bath in the evening (but obviously she doesn't choose this)
feed
sleep
feed
sleep
in the middle of the night she wakes for a feed and I feed her, sometimes finds it hard to get back to sleep

In between she does many, many poos. Sometimes she gets a little windy.

That's basically it.

"Great piece of advice I got which I actually listened to was listen to your baby cry for at least a few seconds before assuming it's hunger and shoving boob or bottle in its mouth, then you'll learnt to differentiate cries. "

I always shove the boob in, sometimes with catastrophic results when she's actually got a pain in her tummy and I make it worse.

My DD is 3 weeks old. We are lucky in that she seems so far to be a good sleeper at night and has her little pattern. Hoping it will last. She is co-sleeping which i personally think makes life easier anyway - the other night I couldn't even remember waking up to feed her, that is how "traumatic" it was LOL

Her Day
Wakes up about 8.30 ish; feeds and is quite alert for about 1.5hours which is nice because DP and I can lie in bed and play with her.

Sleeps feeds and is alert on and off for most of the morning and early afternoon.

Crashs out and sleeps from late afternoon til evening.

Evening, cluster feeds and winges/cries quite a lot (evenings are hard work )

10:30 I take her to bed and she feeds for about an hour then we both go to sleep.

She usually wakes me for a feed at about 3:00am and then again at about 6:00am then we both doze til 8:30 and the whole cycle starts again.

I haven't tried to implement any sort of routine other than taking her to bed with me at 10:30pm and opening the curtains at 9:00am (even if we don't actually get up). She is demand fed and generally I don't put her down at all -we are kind of doing continum concept but not 100% as DP is at work all day and it is nearly impossible to do on your own.

DD3 is 2 1/2 weeks old and although she is my 3rd it's been 5 years so I'm rediscovering all of this, worrying that she's sleeping too much, etc, (I know I know - enjoy it - that's what I used to ell people, but the hormones are raging and I have to worry about something!).

First time around I read Gina (chucked it out, just didn't suit me/us in so many ways), The Baby Whisperer (better, but no cigar), and finally settled on the Baby Book by Dr Sears as my baby bible. Yes, it's American and quite cheesy in a very earthy and sometimes seriously annoying way, BUT - it's written by a pediatrician and his wife (a nurse) who have had 8 kids. And they advocate attachment parenting based on using your instincts and getting to know your baby, as opposed to following rules set by someone who might not even have kids, let alone know anything about yours.

Being an 'instinctive' parent doesn't always come easy, especially in those heady early days, so I found the BB extremely useful as a guide to my first forays into parenthood. It also has a big section on things like breastfeeding, using a sling, sleep arrangements, and common illnesses in the first two years. So highly recommend that too even out the balance if you're planning to look into Gina's methods.

I ended up somewhere in between, doing a routine but basing it around our family's needs, as opposed to what I thought I 'should' be doing.

The best book by far in my opinion is 'what to expect-the first year' - it's full of useful information without preaching or telling you what to do. It was my bible!

I guess Gina Ford is ok if you're a routines kind of person (and if your baby is...) I took one look at a friend's copy and burst out laughing - and she didn't last very long in following it either!

Pretty much all they do at first is eat, sleep and cry. As the midwife in our antenatal class said - as long as you keep them clean(ish), fed and loved you can't really go wrong!

Babies feed, burp, shit/puke then sleep.

They don't much like being put down, so that lovely snuggly moses basket that you have bought may not be as used as you'd like it to be.

Would recommend you invest in a sling (not one with multiple straps/clips or buckles), something simple like a ring sling. This means that you can carry your baby and do the things you need to do (they have been carried since conception and are not easily going to get used to lying flat on their back in a cold cot).

They are lovely though. so good luck.

PS I'm not sure I'd recommend GF without suggesting that you explore the alternatives like "attachment parenting" as well, just for contrast. Be warned: Parenting styles can be as contentious and held with as much fervour and bigotry as religious beliefs.

My GP told me she didn't feel she was clever enough to follow Gina Ford

I have what to expect in the first year, too. It's full of ideas that might work for you and your LO, but recognising that all parents and all babies are different, which is reassuring.

Also have read the baby whisperer - OK, but led me to believing I was misinterpreting hunger cries when my DD was probably genuinely hungry for a little while

DD is now 4 1/2 months and we have a "flexible routine", which works OK for us. First few weeks (months) were all over the place...

Have fun

Thanks everyone. Feeling a little more reassured and will try not to get too stressed worrying about whether I'm doing the right thing.

Skidoodle: "In between she does many, many poos. Sometimes she gets a little windy.
That's basically it." LOL!! Can't wait.

Meandacat, another vote here for "What to expect, the first year" - really good. Had never even changed a baby before I had DD.

This is a little cynical but everything they do starts with "S":

Sleep
Suck
Slurp
Scream
Sick
S**t
Steal your heart
and, faster than you think, smile.

Congratulations. I hope you have an amazing birth experience (it's possible - I had one but I had all the drugs going!) and a wonderful time with your new baby.

the biggest suprise to me was how much of the day i spent BF - to start with it could take up to an hour to feed DD, then by the time we'd changed her and she'd slept for a bit, it would be time to feed her again.

so get a good stock of dvd's, books, iplayer as once the first few months have gone, you'll never have that time back to just sit with a sleepy/ feeding baby again.7

good luck!

I am on demanding baby with serious reflux no.2 and I seriously couldn't have done it without Gina Ford.

I feel when alot of things go wrong I can open my little manual and there are some fantastic ideas that work and the odd one that doesnt work (no two babies are the same).

I think her main mantra is - babies need routine, they thrive on it and they need naps during the day to enable them to sleep at night - so true.

There's nothing more miserable than a knackered toddler except a knackered mum!

If they don't nap well by 1 they will never nap regularly and hell will brake loose on many a hard day!

The thing is with babies, you cant try something once and give up. Consistency is the only way they learn.

I breast fed/feed both of mine, there is a section on how to deal with a breast fed baby and the expected problems and same for bottle fed.

My DD is 10 weeks and has been miserable due to painful reflux. I have slowly and gently guided her towards a rountine(ish) and she gets so excited when I wake her. She undertands what is going to happen next - a wee play and cuddle then a feed.

Same at bath time, she gets excited then settles well at night.

Recommend her highly to all new mums just because ive had a hard time and it keeps me sane.

By the way - she slept ALL night last night - 3 weeks quicker than DS - whoo hoo!

Good Luck but don't take the book too litterally, it's just a helpful manual.

As someone who read far too many books my advice would be to read nothing unless you are really struggling. The Birth to Five book that the midwife gives you has enough practical info to get you through. Go with the flow - I know I would have had a much nicer time if I had.

hi

mother of two, expecting 3rd. for first baby i did like gina ford (SORRY!) it gave me an idea of what to expect. but no beating yourself up if the baby does its own thing - it is what works for you. i liked 'planning' (in the loosest sense!) my day and think the number of feeds at least gives you an idea.

for 2nd, i did glance at it a few times and it will probably gather dust on the shelf in july when this one is due.... but never say never. don't write it off altogether, maybe a copy from the library?

good luck. x