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Original poster

fuck, why won't this baby stop crying

53 replies

memoo · 08/02/2010 14:34

I swear every second of it sounds like some banging at my head with a hammer!

I think I need to go and hide and cry

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abitchilly · 08/02/2010 14:49

Yes, if unusual to be so distraught, Calpol worth a try.

I do think some babies cry more than others even if it's not 'just having a cry'.

You mustn't feel it's because of something you've done or not done though. Sounds like you're doing everything anybody could do.

Hope you're outside now!

YoMoJo · 08/02/2010 14:52

I remember those days!

We have snow here at the moment but stick her in her pram & walk, walk, walk! Then when she finally falls asleep go & sit in a cafe & treat yourself to a quiet cuppa & slice of cake!

DS1 was not an easy baby during the day & I spent most of the Autumn/Winter 2007/8 walking the streets in all weathers! As soon as fresh air hit hime he would either stop crying or fall asleep!

Bicnod · 08/02/2010 14:53

Where are you memoo?

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Original poster
memoo · 08/02/2010 14:54

Zubin, she has had a cold and cough but has seemed much better the last few days but guess it could still be her ears or something.

I am going out now, going to walk to chemist and get some teething gel and then pick others up from school.

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Original poster
memoo · 08/02/2010 14:55

Bicnod, I'm in cheshire.

Coffee and cake sounds nice!!

OP posts:
JodieO · 08/02/2010 14:57

Yes where roughly are you? Does she cry after feeding? Could it be wind or reflux? Hope the walk helps.

JodieO · 08/02/2010 14:58

Sorry cross posts, ah nowhere near me then.

Bicnod · 08/02/2010 14:58

Bugger, bit far to meet up from SW London! Would definitely try the calpol. And definitely eat cake - cake solves a multitude of problems IME. Let us know how things are when you're back from your walk? x

PacificDogwood · 08/02/2010 15:40

Hope your walk/school run helped .

'Tis a good idea to get her ears checked out if she does not settle at all. If she's had a recent cold and is teething there is a higher chance of a middle ear infection, but you'd also expect a fever with that.

Oh gawd, I remember those days - and I am just about to do it all again...

Ineedsomesleep · 08/02/2010 16:04

Are you in south cheshire?

Original poster
memoo · 08/02/2010 20:20

Hi, I'm in north Cheshire, Warrington. Not feeling great but a lot better since DH came home. Had a doctors appointment this evening anyway as suffer with PND/anxiety so have had a long chat with him and have some new meds to try.

OP posts:
TheFallenMadonna · 08/02/2010 20:26

My DS used to cry all the time. Really, all the time. I got frantic worrying about it, but my mum said "some babies just cry", and I did stop the fretting eventually. Nothing I did made a difference, so I used to sit and hold him while watching the television with the subtitles on. Holding him made me feel better, if not him. Once I stopped worrying that something was wrong, I was able to zone out a bit. Which is probably all wrong, but we both came through unscathed.

morningpaper · 08/02/2010 20:31

very shit time - I found it got better around nine months but this stage is SOOOO HARD and each time four months felt like I'd hit a wall where my patience just ran out and I felt fucking LOST. You just have to keep up the shitty slog. XXXXXXXXXXXX

wonderingwondering · 08/02/2010 20:40

That is true MP - at 3-4 months, the novelty has worn off, people have stopped saying 'well done' and being admiring, but you are shattered as the sleep deprivation is really kicking in, and the baby is still not settled. It is the hardest time, in some ways, I think.

MarthaFarquhar · 08/02/2010 20:44

oh god, that stage is horrible. mine used to cry for no bloody reason whatsoever. it took me ages to work this out after madly trying to "fix" stuff.

I sometimes used to wheel her out in the buggy, whilst wearing my ipod for 20 mins peace.

she was much happier after about a year, and is honestly one of the most placid toddlers I've mey.

fandango75 · 08/02/2010 20:58

my baby bean wasn't even really screamy and i still found it very tough. Reading all these posts took me back (he is only 13 months!) and god how quickly you forget. Good luck good luck with 2 already you know more than me that it gets easier

Bicnod · 08/02/2010 20:59

Glad you're feeling a bit better memoo. Hope you manage to get some sleep tonight x x x

traceybath · 08/02/2010 21:03

Agree with others 4 months is a real low point.

Would also second getting checked out for ear infection.

DS1 was a cryer and god - it was soooooo hard. In fact I've pretty much blocked out most of his first year .

LEMprefersdogstocats · 08/02/2010 21:45

oh you poor thing

I have to flag up HOMESTART here - ask your HV. Are there any local homestart groups? You sound like you really could use a break

xxx

Ineedsomesleep · 09/02/2010 08:14

Warrington is a bit far for me but we can meet up half way if you like.

Hope the new meds work.

Have you tried giving the apni a call? They are supposed to be very good.

The nct also have a counsellor who helps with PND. If you give them a ring on Enquiries Line - 0300 330 0770 they should be able to give you her number.

Hope you have a better day today.

Original poster
memoo · 10/02/2010 22:40

Hi, Sorry I haven't been back on sooner. Having a really bad time. Everything got too much yesterday and Dh ended up having to come home from work at lunch time as I felt and still feel like I just can't cope. He has taken the rest of the week off to look after the baby for a few days to let me rest. He has been an absolute star and all I've done today is rest.

When I came downstairs this afternoon DD saw me and gave me the biggest smile! It was like she had really missed me, she made my day.

I started the new meds the Docotor prescribed me on Monday evening but they made me feel like a total Zombie I'm a bit relucatant to take them. Have tried just taking half of one today and feel alot calmer but less spaced out with is good.

DD is still very unsettled but have a doctors appointment tomorrow to get her ears checked although I suspect its her teeth as today one of her little cheeks was bright red. Still think its worth getting her checked out though.

I have heard a lot of good things about homestart and in theory it sounds like a really good idea but the thought of having a stranger in my house at the moment causes me a lot of anxiety. It is something I will consider doing in the future though as I am definately short on support. Appart from DH there is nobody. My parents live a few hours away and my sister is on the other side of the world.

Ineedsomesleep, thats a really nice idea, maybe when I'm feeling a bit brighter we could do that.

Thanks for all the replies. I know it doesn't change anything but hearing others say that they found this stage difficult too really does remind me that this won't last for ever, that no matter how difficult things are at the moment I will come out the other side.

OP posts:
Plonker · 10/02/2010 23:02

Sorry you're having a hard time memoo. Do you still have my phone no?

It's half term here next week and I'm off work, just give me a call if there's anything I can do to help.

Take care and keep your chin up xx

whensmydayoff · 11/02/2010 23:47

I have same problem. My DD has reflux.

Screams day and night. Feeding is a nightmare, Pulls off, arches her back.

Hates being lay down flat, have moses basket tilted 30 degrees and lie her on her tummy to sleep.

Rule out reflux, even if she is not sick it could be silent reflux.

My DS had it too but didnt scream as constant. I want to run away alot!

acebaby · 12/02/2010 12:54

I had a crier too. Even without PND it is so so hard. It sounds like you have a fantastic DH and you are doing a great job in trying circumstances.

With DS1, when it all got too much, I used to grab a magazine or novel and my phone and then drive to a drive through macdonalds. The drive would put him to sleep and I'd sit in the car park with him still asleep and have a coffee and snack, while catching up with friends on the phone or reading. I found that the short break for me and rest for him reset things for both of us. Often afterwards, once he woke up, we'd go off to the library or for a walk.

Incidentally, DS1 was immensely better once he was on solids and sitting up and he is now a delightful(ish) 4 year old.

poshsinglemum · 12/02/2010 20:39

Colic? Dd used to get it but mostly in the evning. ime wind was the evil culprit in most of dds crying spells.