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Really messed up my life.

1 reply

Panther1973 · 01/02/2010 22:05

I have one child, my only child has no other siblings and no other cousins at all. I always felt guilty about that and worried constantly about how he would cope. So I made the decision to have a second child, I thought our family would be complete then. I didn't have a man, so I joined a dating site and a man contacted me, he wasn't really my cup of tea, he already had a child of 13years and was seperated from the child's mother. He was responsible and kind, so I told him that I wanted a child and believed that I could make a go of it with him even though I wasn't madly in love I thought it would come in time. Well, I got pregnant almost immediately after we stopped using contraception. He has now left me, well he just stopped calling or contacting me and has decided to make a go of it with his ex wife. I am pregnant with the child that I desperately wanted for so long, for me and as a sibling for my son. Who is a teenager now anyway. and I am on my own. As I think of it now I think that there is no guarantee that my two children will get on, the daughter that I am expecting may fall out with my son and I, and then go in search of his fathers side of the family, there are more of them than mine in her age group. And my son will still be left alone. I can't believe what I've done. I'm really struggling to develop the right feelings for this child, who's due in 10 weeks. If anyone has any comments on this they'd be greatly appreciated. I really feel so alone at the moment. I know that I've messed things up, I know, I know, I know.

OP posts:
lambanana · 01/02/2010 22:21

I think you are being hard on yourself. Did this happen recently as you sound very bewildered. Does he know about the baby?

Are you upset because the relationship with him has ended or more because you have found yourself in this situation?

Of course your son will love the baby - she is his sister.

I had my son when I was 21 and split with his dad a year later. I later met my dh and had dd1 followed by dd2, DS was 16 when he got a sibling and was and still is thrilled.

Concentrate on yourself and your family and see it as a blessing.

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