I know this is just baby blues, but it sucks

[sushistar]

DS2 is 4 days old - I had a lovely easy birth, DS1 is delighted with the new baby, DH is being very kind and supportive, BF is goiing okish - and today I feel very miserable. I keep worrying about whether we should move house and about how I'll manage to go back to work with 2 DCs when the time comes (9 months away ) and lots of silly things, and weeping all over the place.

It's just hormones, right?

Yes. It gets better. My DS2 is 9 months and the other is 3. I had some dark days but the majority of time now is perfectly doable.

It really does get better.

Congratulations, too!

The first two weeks are hellish, many sympathies. Are you getting support with the BFing. You must be knackered too, it'll pass, it really will

Yes - it is just hormones. Cuddle that baby, give DS1 and DH a big hug, get a back rub from DH and some time to have a nice shower/bath (take your pick) and eat copious amounts of your favourite comfort food (chocolate hobnobs were mine) and will all be much better soon. And coping with 2 kids and going back to work is fine - it all works out (DS2 now 11 months, DS1 3 and a half, back at work for 4 months now and all still surviving and loving being a family of 4 )

Yep, me too. DS2 is now 3 mths and DS1 (19mths) has totally adjusted and we're all ticking along nicely. Start was v hard though. Everyone warned me the jump from one to two was tough, and they were right!

Best wishes x

i had this too wtih dd2 - try not to force things, try to go with the flow. don't feel guilty (which is what I did), try to remind yourself that you have a wholelife time of love and smiles ahead and you don't need to pressure yourself now. even if the birth went well you'll still be exhausted. If it doesn't pass (and i bet it will) talk to your mw/gp/hv (whichever is more open/sympathetic). I had a great hv who saw thta i needed just a bit of extra support - she came round for cups of tea and was thoroughky marvellous.

It's not even that I AM finding it that tough pratically - I just weep all the time! I know things probably will get harder but at the moment we're on top of things, both DCs are happy, we're managing the visitors and the housework etc - I have no reason to be mierable. I just am.

It is definitely the hormones. Day 3/4 is pretty notorious for it.

I just want to tell you that you are not alone. I had baby blues and was really shocked at how brutal it is,considering what an innocuously whimsical name they give it.

I felt like I had been hit by a truck and that I would never be happy again. I had endless impromptu crying jags and couldn't see a way out of the misery.

After two weeks, the fog lifted and I am as happy as usual (pretty happy- I'm a jolly sort).

You have my deepest sympathy but I promise you, it will lift.xxxxx

Hiya, just wanted to add to those saying that you are not alone and that it will probably pass quite quickly.

Hello sushistar and congratulations!

I think what you're feeling is very normal but I know that doesn't make it any easier.

I think 'baby blues' is a terrible name and I don't think it's helpful to be told that they'll last a few days. Mine were more like baby-bottomless-pit-blacks and I felt pretty bad for about 4 weeks. Like you, I had a lovely birth and supportive DH (but BF didn't work out and was v traumatic) and felt really guilty for feeling so bad. But it DID all pass, even though it felt like an eternity at the time.

I took some comfort from the idea - perhaps fanciful - that there's an evolutionary purpose to us feeling all down and gloomy just after childbirth. Maybe to make sure we stay in our caves and look after our little ones rather than running around the savannah and risking being eaten by lions. Or something (told you it was fanciful!).

I'm sending you lots of positive vibes for these first few weeks.

I had it too - just cried and cried for weeks, couldn't understand why, didn't think I had a reason either. But it did get better, of course it does!

Looking back, I think that what might have helped is a lot more skin to skin contact with DD. I'm pretty sure this is supposed to help with hormones. But people around me were actually not that helpful. They all wanted to hold the baby so I ended up running around doing housework instead. They just kept taking her off me, would order me upstairs to sleep where I would lie crying by myself for 3 hours!!

Wish I'd told them to make me dinner/clean the house instead - I'm sure it would have felt better if I could have stayed in bed snuggling up with DD.

I sobbed and sobbed days 4 and 5 of dc2. I did it in front of dc1 too as I couldn;t help myself which wasn't a great idea. I couldn't work out how to get her to school PM nursery in time without the baby crying for a feed.
I was miserable yet had a great birth, dc1 loved her new brother and all was going well.

I knew it was the hormones and it did pass.

It will pass for you too and you'll get in the swing.

be kind to yourself and accept any offers of help.