Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

2yr suddenly won't sleep - please help!

14 replies

nellanella · 28/01/2010 13:11

Since Monday night my elder daughter who is almost 2 has refused to go to bed - this has happened really suddenly and we are at a loss to know why and what to do. She has been sleeping fine - getting into the cot and maybe taking a little while to sleep - but happily flicking through a book and chattering. her 8 mo sister has been in the same room for almost 2 months. My daughter does not want to get into the cot, wants to be held, if I say do you want to go to sleep she shakes her head. She had got really upset - we have tried talking to her and staying with her but even right next to her by the cot she has screamed and cried really badly.

It has I think been a mistake to try to leave the room even for a few minutes and she has got really really upset and that is clearly not going to help whatever is happening. people are so quick to tell you that you are making a rod for your own back thta

OP posts:
teaandcakeplease · 28/01/2010 13:39

Have you considered moving her into a big girls bed? A lot of people lately on mumsnet who have been having similar issues have found moving into a big girls bed has helped resolve things?

Whilst getting her used to being in a bed (if you do go down this route) probably best to take 8 mo out of room for a while.

nellanella · 28/01/2010 13:59

Thank you - sorry my message got cut off! I am surprised by that - she is wanting us to stay with her more than showing annoyance at being in the cot. She wants to get out of the cot if she is ever in there for a couple of minutes if I am doing something but has been perfectly happy to sleep. Next problem is going to be that she does not like the door being shut - but clearly we need to shut the door at night so maybe I will have to get a stairgate instead.

I have just tried this by taking baby out of the room so at least that little sweetpea gets some sleep and I have put the mattress on the floor.

I was going to finish by saying that people tell you that you are making a rod for your own back by having the child in bed with you or staying in the room or whatever so I have a tendency to try to take a firmer line but clearly she has not responded.

OP posts:
teaandcakeplease · 28/01/2010 14:06

I think it's the old adage "a change is as good as a rest".

The change may help. I keep my toddler bedroom door pulled to, so I can sneak in and check without waking her.

I posted something on another thread the other day with similar problems. And this worked for them. Maybe luck?

My daughter was like a Jack in the Box in the bed when I first moved her into it and kept laughing and opening the door and coming out, I explained she was going to be a big girl like Peppa Pig and sleep in a bed on the first night.

Over a number of nights I repeatedly lay her back down without talking to her, or looking at her and left again, multiple times. Eventually the game got boring as I never reacted and she stopped doing it. I had to child proof the room and remove all the toys, so she wouldn't play with them instead, if being put to bed in the early days. Some children do end up needing a stair gate on their door as they get older if problematic. Fingers crossed yours will be an angel

Her daytime naps were interesting once in a bed in the early days, I had to repeat the old exercise of repeatedly laying down. If you make sure they're tired before laying down (sorry stating the obvious) that's your best bet for daytime naps.

I do think once a toddler learns that they can say no or resist certain things, it's a whole new ball game . My daughter regularly suddenly decides she doesn't like something that previously she had done a million times and had no problems with. But this is a whole can of worms, so I won't open it. But it maybe worth trying a bed if you can face it?

Of course there maybe another logical explanation on this sudden change that I cannot think of. Perhaps another mumsnetter will be along soon with a plan.

Best of luck x

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

nellanella · 28/01/2010 14:23

thank you - I have now brought her back downstairs as she is saying she is not tired and does not appear to be tired so as you say there is no point in putting her in bed - I guess i was lulled into a false sense of security by her staying in bed and chattering so eh ho that's me fooled!

The only thing I can remember happening on monday was two children coming round who she has not seen for a fair while and so are probably like strangers to her and they came in and took over all of her toys and she is fairly reticient so children do snatch from her and stuff and she does not like it as no of us would. She had been a bit clingy in the park walking with them beforehand.

At 4am she was happy to stay in the cot if my husband staying in the room which he did and ended up lying on the floor and sleeping!

OP posts:
nellanella · 28/01/2010 14:26

Sorry can I say again because as you can imagine 3 nights like this (and sleep having not been fantastic before) and no respite in the day, is killing me so I really need help! It is more that my daughter does not want to go to sleep and does not want to be left by us - almost a seperation anxiety than anything else?

OP posts:
teaandcakeplease · 28/01/2010 14:29

Maybe somethings scared her, bad dreams? Does she have a night light?

I really really hope someone else comes along with some ideas for you soon. I'll stop hi-jacking your thread now.

Bump it tonight, once all the Mums netters have put their little darlings to bed. Maybe then you'll have some more ideas x

BornToFolk · 28/01/2010 14:31

DS has been a bit funny about being left to go to sleep so we have been saying that we're just going to do something and will be back to check on him in 10 mins. It usually works - he's happy for us to leave, and if he's tired, he'll drop off quickly.

He has a music CD on that he enjoys listening to (and associates with sleep!) Could you try this or would it disturb the baby?

PureAsTheColdDrivenSnow · 28/01/2010 14:35

We had this the week after DS had his 2nd birthday. Took us forever to work out that he just wanted the door left open. Once we did, he was fine again.

It's a very typical age for nightlights/doors open I think. HTH

nellanella · 28/01/2010 15:16

Thank you - trouble is that we have tried the "just popping out for a minute" and that no longer works and the door is left open with the hall light.

She has not had her afternoon nap at all now today and normally has at least an hour and a half - I just don't understand such a sudden change in behaviour.

OP posts:
TarkaLiotta · 28/01/2010 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsTriangle · 29/01/2010 11:16

I think it's as they become more aware of their surroundings than ever before.

I recommend putting a little light on in the room - you can get cheap touch lamps that have 3 levels of brightness for example, so it doesn't need to be really bright.

nellanella · 30/01/2010 19:45

Hello again

It turns out my daughter has had an ear infection so thank you for suggesting that. I have started giving her ibuprofen as recommended by the dr - however she is still not wanting to go to bed. She has been fine all week and showing no signs of an infection. My husband has stayed holding her to get her off to sleep - now crying as I type as he has obviously just put her into the bed.

The issue about the light - she will not lie down in the afternoon for the nap even though she is exhausted - she fell asleep in the high chair and that has never happened before.

The sleep routine has gone from being excellent to terrible in the space of a week and we now do not know what to do.

OP posts:
MrsTriangle · 30/01/2010 21:26

ah ok. do they say she currently has an infection or has got over one?

For some reason, infective conditions always cause bother at night and it maybe that lying down / her contact with a pillow causes some discomfort.

Is she in pain do you think? ear infections are excruciating? If so, I would alternate ibuprofen with paracetamol every 4 hours and just ride it throuhg, doing what you need to do. Is she on antibiotics?

nellanella · 31/01/2010 12:22

Hello again

sorry - I have got 2 threads which are basically the same running!

DD has been having 2 hrs in the afternoon but recently has taken 1/2 hr or so at afternoon nap and in the evening to settle so I can see that - with much reluctance for me - maybe I cut back to 1 hr in the afternoon.

She has got an ear infection but keeps pointing to the ear that was not particularly red - only points when I ask so I am not sure if I have made the association for her - I have been giving ibuprofen for the last 2 days. I will maybe get the antibiotics tomorrow but dr said see how she goes first without them.

She seems absolutely fine in the daytime and is not in any way under the weather - I think what started off as the ear infection has become a refusal to go to bed and refusal to be left alone to try to go to sleep.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page