Feeling down - want to be a stay at home mum!

[NobbyD]

Hi everyone,

This is a rather selfish post as am feeling quite down in the dumps and wanted to voice it and I understand thats what MN is for!

I work full time, 37 hours a week. I have an 18month ds who goes to nursery 4 days a week (which is handily attached to dp's work so he does all drop offs and pick ups) and then fridays he is with MIL.

I work quite far away - although am changing my job soon which will hopefully be better travel. I leave the house at 7.30 and don't return til gone 6 which means 5 days a week I see ds for approx 1 hour every day and its killing me.

Dp also works full time but as mentioned he takes ds to nursery and picks him up at about 4pm everyday so they have 2 hours together before I even get in. Dp cooks his dinner which I am sometimes home in time to give to him but more often am not. By the time I get in its the military routine of book, bath, milk, bed.

I feel I am missing out on so much. I come home and he's learnt a new phrase or done something for the first time and I wasn't there. Its just so hard but yet I cannot afford to change it (hence this is a silly rant).

Any other working mums who knows how to get over the guilt?

I was in exactly the same position when I had DS1, so I do understand. I can't offer advice, as you can't change the situation for now.

Me, things changed and I am with a new partner. We have a new child and I have been lucky enough to be a SAHM by choice this time around. But although I think DS2 has been lucky having me around, I think he lacks a certain amount of confidence that DS1 gained whilst at nursery.

Plus DS2 doesn't get to do as much arts and crafts, singing etc as DS1 did at nursery. So there are benefits, but its hard to see when you feel like that, I know.