Refluxy baby/ stressed post natal mum!

[Tras]

Hi everyone, Just need a good moan and if anyone has any advice, that would be great! My baby girl is 6 months old and if one more person asks me if im enjoying my maternity leave i will scream!!! I look at other mums who seem so relaxed and I feel anything but.

Our little girl seems to have had everything going from colic, to lactose intolerance, to reflux and i am beginning to feel at the end of my tether!

I battle every day to get EVERY bottle into my baby and just when things seem to get easier she gets a cold and starts vomiting constantly again.

We started weaning at 21wks because she wasn't gaining weight and she seems to dislike anything but fruit puree. She cries everytime she sees me coming with the spoon. I thought that spoon feeding would help but its becoming a nightmare as well.

I keep telling myself that we should be grateful she isnt really sick but that doesnt help with the sheer frustration. She has also been wakening every night about 5-6 times per night for the past month. Dont know if its teeth, reflux or both!

Sorry for being such a moan. Is anyone else out there in the same boat? Anyone got advise?

Sorry you're having such a crap time of it. Have you tried Gaviscon Infant. DS2 is the same age as your DD and it helped his reflux, although to honest he didn't have it badly.

We tried the Gaviscon but it didnt really help. She is on Ranitidine at the moment which is the next step up. She has had the hiccups 6 times today already and is getting so pissed off with them. This is a particularly bad day for her an me!

DS was a similar feeder and was totally off all milk by 9 months. He also fought every bottle but he LOVED his spoon feeds. I know I just need to be patient with DD but its hard when we feel we have been patient for so long.

If I try to persevere with the spoon feed she just gags and vomits up her whole bottle (which took 45 mins to give). Giving her all fresh foods but beginning to think i might go out and buy a few jars to see if she likes them better.

No wonder you're frazzled. I also took DS2 to the cranial osteopath, which seemed to relax him a lot. How is your DH on rice/porridge?

Tras, you have my sympathy, my two would both gag and then throw up their entire stomach contents.

We did baby gaviscon to no effect then saw paed and he was against giving drugs before trying a thickening formula. We were given one that thickens on contact with stomach acid so you can use a normal teat on a bottle or use a cup.

We had Enfamil AR (anti-reflux) you can get it from a pharmacy. It really helped.

As she is 6 months old try giving her finger food rather than the puree. then she has a bit of control too. I worried myself sick that ds2 would gag but he was much better than I ever imagined.

Have you got her cot propped? I have only just removed Ds2's blocks from his bed, he is nearly 4 (sorry) and yes he refluxed till he was 3 1/2 but wasn't sick and only did it about once a week in his throat.

I am imagine you have had a very difficult/upsetting/stressful six months.

My DD2 was a shocker with the reflux too and I think I was probably depressed with trying to manage her and try and keep her happy. Do you think you might have a bit of PND?

Reflux babies can be hard to bond with IME as sometimes nothing will make them happy, which makes you feel like a crap mother. That's how I felt.

Things will improve very soon for you I'd say although that's not much help right now. Is she sitting unaided yet? I used anything and everything to keep DD upright, the bumbo seat and baby exerciser thing saved my sanity. I played Baby Mozart type DVD's and CD's too which she did seem to like. I often played on of the DVD's while feeding her, although you'd not want to continue this long-term.

Once they can sit unaided and crawl, pull themselves up she should improve (physically and emotionally).

I'd also second upping the finger foods. Offer at same time as spoon feeds, offer a second spoon as well. Try a thickener or change around formula types. Watch your behaviour at feeding times, try to relax don't look concerned/stressed if she does't like it. Let her dip hands into fruit purees and mess about with it all, hold small pieces of soft fruit or cooked veges.

I always remember this lovely smiley photo of DD aged 9 months, I hardy have any smiley photos of her at all prior to this. I'm not kidding. She just sort of 'emerged' into a different child as the reflux was lessening.

She did become the most challenging toddler though, tantrum-city and her behaviour has reduced me to tears on occasions. But I still love her and now that she's three she is becoming more easy-going.

My DS was exactly as you describe your DD, but it did get better quite quickly once he started moving and his core strength improved.

If he is 6 months now you might try yoghurt, my DS still isn't too keen on milk but he takes as much yoghurt as I will give him and it seems to help settle his tum.

Im sitting here in tears too over a refluxy baby no 2.

My DH is currently in the bedroom with the hairdryer on (calms her down) trying to get her to sleep.

My DS had it but we didnt know why he was so hard until he was diagnosed at 5 months. They gave us Omeprazole and Domperidon and I would have taken heroin at that point! I didnt question it, I just grabbed with both hands and my life changed for the better over night.

I now have a beautiful 6 week old DD but she had reflux too.

Its the feeding that has me in bits too. Im breastfeeding but i know from trying my DS on a bottle it isnt that much easier so there's no point.

Im sick of trying to feed and she is arching her back screaming, on and off but determined to feed so it goes on for 2 hours a feed. I end up sweating with the exersion, exhausted and weepy. My DS was exactly the same and its bringing back all the horrible memories. I was hoping for an easier time this time.

I googled reflux this time and found the meds I had my DS on stopped the absorbtion of calcium and other minirals which im devastated to read. I struggled to feed him for 5 horrid months and cooked all that organic food thinking it was all worth it to have a healthy child and I didn't know the meds were un doing all my hard work .

Whats worse is, I dont know where to turn. I cant give her the meds but I cant go on like this.

Im going off on one.

I dont have any advice as your DC is 6 months now. For anyone with a young baby with reflux - they settle better on tummies but would advice you get a moniter with breathing sensor pad if doing.

That thicker formula idea sounds good for you. Im noting it down incase I decide I cant do breastfeeding anymore.

Thanks everyone for your messages. Nice to know im not alone. Would try the thicker formula only I think she has lactose intolerance and i have her on a lactose free milk. Dont think you can get a thickening formula in that.

I breastfed her for the first six weeks and after wk1 she started screaming every night. This then moved on to during and after every feed. She then developed a severe rash all over her body. At six wks I decided I had to try something else and moved her on the lactose free milk. She stopped screaming and the rash disappeared but she was still refluxy. I didnt get this confirmed because you need to test their stools whilst on normal milk and Im afraid to go back and try. However I know that I need to try eventually because if she is going to go off milk early I need to try and replace with yoghurts, cheese etc. Cant do this if she is lactose intolerant.

We have tried cranial sacreal therapy for a number of sessions but this didnt really help. We are now taking her to a chiropractor but this doesnt seem to be helping either.! ARGHH Would try anything to help her.

Beginning to think she just doesnt like milk. Cant understand it and DR's are pretty crap because she is still gaining weight!

Whensmydayoff you sound very similar to us!Its so difficult when ur trying to breast feed and they just dont want it. You just feel so frustrated. At least when ur bottle feeding someone else can take a turn. I expressed for a while but had to try something else for the sake of my mental health!

My DD is now addicted to the hairdryer and when she wakens 6-7 times per night we have to put it on. lol Gonna try to wean her off this as its also pure torture!

I know I sound like a moan and do feel so guilty. My DD is a wee honey when she isnt feeding! lol

There is a website which I found very useful www.cryingoverspiltmilk.co.nz which is a NZ website (I'm a kiwi) it has lots of suggestions for coping strategies and the medications are the same in UK and NZ so it all still is relevant.

There is a product available here in the UK called Karicare Food Thickener which was going to be the next thing I tried after Gaviscon. I was recommended it by the HV, it is used as a thickener for premature babies. It is lactose/dairy free. Might be work a try?

Ingredients:

Maltodextrin, starch (from maize), carob bean gum.

Dosage:

Karicare Food Thickener can be mixed with a small amount of cool, boiled water or expressed breast milk and fed as a gel before, during or after the breast feed. Also refer to packaging on how to prepare thickened bottle feeds and preparing a gel. Note if thickened fluids are refrigerated they may become thicker over time.

Caution:

Breast milk is best for babies, therefore before you decide to use this product, consult your doctor or healthcare professional for further advice

After 9 months of Gavison I went cold turkey with no more meds and found that there wasn't a huge change so carried on without. Although a friend did have to keep using meds up until 13 months.

DD2 dropped all milk from 10 months, not my doing although I did move her from a bottle to a beaker at that time. We left the milk behind and moved v quickly to a three proper meals a day plus snacks, cheese and yoghurts she would take happily and still does.

Tras - have you tried softly playing classical music through the night?? Strangely it did work for us and was a bit relaxing for me too.

Tip the cot to as much as a 45 degree angle, get it as high as you can without them sliding down in a heap at the end of the slide. There are harness things and wedges you can get to stop them sliding but easily you could wrap and use nappy pins and an old square cloth nappy to keep them fixed.

whensmydayoff you have my sincere sympathies. Keep talking to your HV and try different strategies. As you've been through it all before you do know it gets better. It is easy to become very down about the whole situation.

IME I struggled with accepting that this was going to be 'my lot' with DD2 and that she wasn't going to be the smiley/cuddly/happy newborn i was hoping for, but you do need to accept that this is a condition that they are suffering from. There is no cure other than waiting it it out. So keep trying different strategies and hopefully you'll get about 80% there which is manageable day-to-day until they begin to grow out of it.

tras i know this is not the usual advice for a six month old but could you try offering solids before milk instead of after? If they are gagging (but not choking) try not to fuss or worry, keep up the encouragement and smiles at feeding time even if you feel like you are going mad!

I went through this with my DD and they thought she was lactose intolerant but it turned out to be reflux. I also would recommend enfamil AF formula. Worked a treat and my baby turned from being a screaming in agony baby to a happy relaxed one. I eventually paid for her tosee a peadiatrician (sp) privately because I could not a get a satisfactory answer from my HV or GP.

hope you can find some help. Please keep us posted. I know how exausting it is having a baby that just screams and screams.

On the yoghurt from I think it is easier to digest than milk, my DS was lactose intollerant (which he grew out of) but managed yogurt fine.

whensmydayoff six - eight weeks is a notoriously unsettled time even for non-refluxy baby. So some of her unsettledness (sp) might be down to this development stage and a growth spurt, too?

Has your hv or dr considered a casein intolerance. It is the Milk protein and different to lactose can case reflux and considerable distress.. DD1 very bad reflux. Managed to wean daugter from hoover to one of those baby swings which gained me 4 hours sleep a night. It saved my life but she was 4 before she slept through. It turns out she was probably casein intolerant. She now has daily antacid.

Babyswing worked wonders for my child's safety, kept him from being thrown against a wall many a day....
Don't worry about cost you can either ebay a cheap one or buy a nice one and ebay it after!

DS1, reflux and lactose intolerant... at 6 months he went on to soya formula he wasn't very uncomfortable but he was soooo sick that my whole top would be covered in vomit.

ds2 fine

dd1, screamed and vomited for 8 months. GPs every other week and never diagnosed. She would not be put down and fed hourly. She would calm a little with a foot massage.

ds3 Terrible reflux, at 9 weeks consultnat saw us for something else and watched him feed. Diagnosed reflux and gave gaviscon, then rantitide(sp). We also invested in a swing, the combination of sitting up and rocking with the buzz of the vibrating seat and it would give me an hour off to hear other children, I would say read but actually to hear them was nice! Our house was very loud.

For you OP I woud ensure you get out of the house as much as possible. Do whatever it takes to stop going crazy and know it does stop, it will get better.
Take care, I know how you feel!!

Also make sure her food isn't acidic, fruit stuff can be. I would give baby carrot and other such sweet but not acidic stuff....sweet potato etc.

Thanks all! Ur comments have been really helpful. Its just good to know that there are others out there who have been in the same boat. Makes me feel better all ready.

All my friends babies guzzle 8oz bottles in 10mins!

my dd always fell asleep after 5 mins despite my best efforts to keep her awake. I guess she was just exhausted.

I remember celebrating when ds2 drank a 5oz bottle, I nearly cried.

You do feel alone, it seems everyone else has it easy. My 2 were very different, Ds1 wasn't in pain in the day but he projectile vomited all the time. But when we put him down at night because it was after a milk feed he would kick off from 7 - 10pm every night. Had no sympathy from GP or HV, all they kept saying was at least it isn't happening at 2am

Ds2 writhed in pain every feed, broke my heart, sicked up every feed and as he feed was only 2oz and took forever to get down him I wanted to cry.

Because he was 17 weeks when he was put on the Enfamil AR formula and I am a SAHM I let him sleep upright on me in the day time until he was 12 months old. I was lucky to be able to do this, and trust me it is the most BORING thing in the world. At night we would wait till he was drifting off before putting him down in his propped up cot. I also carried him in a sling until he was 2!!!

Ah the sacrifices we make for our children

Tras, my sympathies. my 6 mo DS also has bad acid reflux and lactose intolerance and we've recently discovered he has cow milk protein intolerance/ allergy.

when I stopped breastfeeding he was on enfamil AR, then SMA lactose free, and is now on hydrolised formula (Nutramigen) but we thicken it up with Instant Carobel (by cow and gate). it's made with mainly carob bean gum and unlike gaviscon, doesn't give babies constipation.
My DS is also on omeprazole and only stopped screaming after he was put on it at 12 weeks or so.

Having a baby who suffers with reflux has been one of the most stressful experiences I have been through.