OK, so DS is almost a year old and I still watch his tummy go up and down. When will I start to chill out?

[Bambinoloveseggbirds]

DS is 11 months, and whilst I know that I care for him very well in the fed, watered, loved sense, I don't feel like I can let myself go as a mum and just enjoy him for the lovely boy that he is. I feel worried all the time, and I mean, really worried. I put DS to bed at night and thank god that he is going to bed safe and well then I wake up every morning and thank god that he made it through the night. I am not even religious.

I have PND, I know I do, but don't want to take anti-depressants and I know that's what the docs will put me on. Not sure what to do. Is the worrying something that will go away eventually, or will it just get worse as they get older. I also keep having recurring thoughts where a funeral keeps popping into my mind. I seem to have become the most morbid anxious dullard. Any advice gratefully received

Hopefully Thank you. I am definitely considering St John's Wort and have been looking into that. The Swedes swear by it too for SAD. I have also been looking into yoga classes as I think some exercise will also do me good - and help with the bit of baby weight that I am still carrying .

Ooh, I used to find yoga really good - really chilled me out and made me generally happier.

Apparently you can get cheap st johns in Lidl/Aldi (check the strength is the same as Holland and Barretts or somewhere though).

Best of luck!

I spend hours getting DD to sleep and then I prod her to make sure she's still alive , can't help myself. She's nearly two

I'm on anti D's and they don't make me spaced out or any more tired than I would be, juggling a job with my little devil cherub