Eventful morning

[FabIsVeryHappy]

You all know I have had plenty of difficulties with DS1 (8yrs) and this morning is no exception. I walked out to get a neighbour to help and then phoned DH. Got the kids to school and then went to my therapy session and spent the whole time talking about DS1 coming to the conclusion that I am scared of DS, he is in charge and almost like he is on a pedestal.

He is my first born, we thought we were going to lose him at 8 weeks and then nearly did at 38 weeks and he is my heart. I love him so much. I love my other children too but for me, my first born is a different relationship.

Currently my 4 year old is 6 minutes into a tantrum as I won't let him eat his crisps in the lounge. New house rule is all meals at the table as he will eat his crisps and then ask for food every 10 minutes but he isn't properly hungry as he will refuse fruit and bread and butter and just wants crackers and biscuits. I am trying to go back to a proper lunch at the table and then a snack at school pick up time.

I feel mean but I have told him the score.

I can handle ds2 much better than ds1.

Tantrum not stopped of his own accord.

Going to talk to him now.

We have had a good afternoon. How funny that one hour talking with someone can reset my brain and give me the confidence to be the parent. I am seriously lacking in confidence in my parenting skills but feel happy that I have achieved something today and haven't shouted this afternoon.

Fab - am glad that you are feeling more confident this afternoon. I have crises of confidence with DS and he's only 2! especially about giving in over the eating stuff - I swore I never would but when it comes down to a choice of him not eating at all or only eating crackers with spread on, then at least 50% of the time I'll go with the crackers .

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Thank you.

I have skim read as I have a lousy cold and head ache coming and need to make notes once the kids have gone to bed but thank you. That must have taken ages to type out.

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Hi

I haven't had chance to read it yet as I had to take the car to the garage this morning, wait an hour for hubby to come and get me and have been cleaning ds1's room ever since. I haven't finished but I have had enough so are MNting for a bit. I have a lousy head ache and can't stop sneezing but I feel so much better about being able to deal with ds1 and get some control. All because I have realised I was scared of him. He has been different too. Lots of cuddles and wanting to read his book to me and not Daddy.

Thank you