5 yr old ds bf trying to control him-wwyd?

[ladylush]

It turns out that ds is being told not to play with other friends,to not take part in various activities he usually does at play time, to eat exactly the same thing as bf.....otherwise he will not be ds's friend or let him come to his house. I am friends with the boy's mum so it is rather awkward but obviously I have to put ds first. We had a chat with ds and he understands that what bf is doing is wrong. We advised him to stand up to bf if said behaviour continues and to tell him he doesn't want to go to his house if that is being used as a threat. We also advised ds to tell the teacher if it continues. The boy in question has been struggling at school recently (another reason why it will be difficult to raise topic with his mum)- not wanting to go and clinging to parents. I wonder whether he is trying to control ds because he feels so out of control iyswim. Ds has been very supportive of him during this time and because he feels bf is delicate, is worried standing up to him will make him upset. This morning the TA approached me to comment on ds reading so I took the opportunity to mention it, saying I wanted to keep it low key at the moment but just wanted them to be aware. If this was your dc, how would you handle it?

I could have written this last year. We got through it by
a) not making a big deal of it to DS, although it drove me and DH mad.
b) kept impressing upon DS how much fun it was to play in big groups, how you're not reliant on one person then - what if that person is off sick?
c) I invited a bigger circle of other little boys round to play.

In the end the intense friendship fizzled out and although they're still friends, the other little boy has now moved on to another child. They do move around in their friendships quite a bit too, at that age.

Thanks Juicy. They have been close friends for about 2 years now as met at nursery and it is quite an intense friendship. Ds is happy to play in a large group but his friend less so. This year and last, the teachers try to split them up so they mix with other kids but this stuff is happening during play time.
I have invited another boy over to play - agree that it helps to encourage other friendships.