Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

How many people dont have a TV or Nintendo/Wii/Gameboy?

68 replies

nighbynight · 29/11/2009 14:22

Just interested in hearing other people's experiences.
We had no TV when I was a child, because my parents thought it was full of rubbish.
I have bought a TV for my children, but draw the line at Nintendos, gameboys, Wiis and similar stuff.
Now I am getting pressure from ds, who says that he is the only child in his class who doesnt have one of these things,a nd that he is left out when they discuss the latest game. Apparently, they all take the nintendos to birthday parties, where they talk to each other via the messaging system, and play interactive games, and my children are the only ones who dont have one, and everyone thinks its because we are poor...
People round where we live tend to be very materialistic, but I do know another family that bans handheld gaming stuff.

I have no faith in the argument that "oh, they'll stop using it when the novelty wears off" because my children spend as long as I let them on the computer on websites like SpielAffe and PandaFu(games). And the more time they get, the more they want.
Does anyone not have a TV these days, or has the battle line shifted to nintendos and their ilk?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Madsometimes · 30/11/2009 11:00

We have TV, consoles etc in our house, so I am a lax parent! No TV in bedrooms allowed though, and cannot see this changing. The children do argue, but they like arguing I think

After 6:30 we get control of the TV and the children go upstairs to their rooms, where they have books and colouring activities etc before bedtime. This does mean that our 9 yo dd1 does not get to watch X-Factor etc because we do not watch programmes like that. We do watch Dr Who though. Maybe I am denying my older dd access to popular culture. She says that lots of her class mates watch EastEnders, but I do not allow her to see things like that.

I do know families where TV is totally banned for children. They tend to either be very middle class or very religious families.

BrokenArm · 30/11/2009 12:47

I'm glad that DC watch some TV as it is, they feel very left out in playground chat about stuff on telly they got to see a little of XFactor for 1st time ever last weekend.

tECHNICALLY WE HAVE NO tv BUT we have tv card in one of the PCs. No game consoles. Regular but restricted time on computer games.

I feel uncomfortable about friends who try hard 2 shield their DC from (?too?) much of modern culture. I see many good aspects in this strategy, but many negative aspects, too. It will be very interesting to see how our kids all turn out in 20 years (not pretending I know my way is better, but the 'experiment' fascinates me).

In one almost-no-screens frugal socially conscious choices family I am looking on as amusement as I note their older teens massively rebelling by embracing consumerism, self-centred worries, pop culture & image obsession. Is it just a phase? Will all their dc follow suit? Will my DC be far worse?

Takver · 30/11/2009 13:45

I like your categorisation as 'very middle class or very religious' Madsometimes - the only person I've known as an adult who had no tv as a child was both (very middle class, catholic family tho only catholic in a relaxed sort of way himself).

I was friends with him when we were both students - he never watched tv really then either (not that any of us did, we were too busy getting pissed working hard) - and he said that he'd never missed it or felt left out as a child.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Takver · 30/11/2009 13:50

I do also look around me at the older teens/twenty somethings I know who have grown up in communes, hippy families and the like & I really don't see them embracing consumerism to any great extent, maybe the odd can of coke or whatever, but they all seem to be doing dreadfully socially responsible/interesting things, far more so than any one I knew as a teenager. Perhaps they will all rebel as 30-somethings and go off and become accountants

Pitchounette · 30/11/2009 14:03

Message withdrawn

BitOfFun · 30/11/2009 14:06

In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter?

VinegarTits · 30/11/2009 14:08

haha

Pitchounette · 30/11/2009 14:10

Message withdrawn

Francasaysrelax · 30/11/2009 14:20

Our dc are 7 and 5. We have a TV, which is used to watch dvds.
We don't have DS, Wii, Playstation and the likes.

CookieMonster2 · 30/11/2009 16:07

Thanks for the book recommendation, it does look an interesting read. The funny thing about this thread is that I live in a very middle class area (and I am declaring this because some people think that class determines your views on this subject) and amongst my friends and colleagues I am without a doubt the strictest parent when it comes to TV etc. This is because my kids don't just watch whatever they want, adverts and all, we only watch specific pre-recorded programmes and we only have the tv on at a certain time of day. Having said that though, kids need to know about advertising, as they will be exposed to plenty of it when they are older, and they need to understand what these companies are doing and why they are doing it so they don't get taken in by it.

The internet is a valuable resource (and surely if people are using mumsnet they must agree with that) and I want my kids to appreciate the benefits of it, be able to use it to obtain information, and know how to protect themselves from the less desirable aspects of it. I believe the best way for them to do that is use it at home. I just don't buy the argument that they learn how to use computers at school; they learn how to read and write at school but we still do plenty of it at home.

At the end of the day I just want my kids to be streetwise, well rounded people.

LauraIngallsWilder · 30/11/2009 17:42

Cookie - toxic childhood or any others by the same author are truly brilliant.
Definately worth a read

MilaMae · 30/11/2009 18:19

I've read the book and think it's brilliant however we have a tv,computer and my 6 year old's have just recently got a DS. Toxic Childhood does not advocate no TV etc just not hours of it. As in anything re raising kids it's all about balance.

I do not like my kids(6,6 and 5) on the computer for hours as it's a very anti social activity(back to everybody else)and the web contains far more trash than TV imho. A lot of computer software aimed at kids is also trash imho. As a result they have the odd half hour at weekends.

I don't like my kids watching hours of trashy tv but they are allowed to chill out after school with CBBC etc(it was Cbeebies before). We have a no TV before school rule. We will never have TV's in bedrooms,we only have 1. They watch DVDs sometimes instead. We are all total bookworms and they read masses. We also talk a lot,eat together etc.

The boys have just had DS's for their bdays. They were forbidden before they were 6.I was pleasantly surprised as they're fab. Nintendogs has taught one of my son's a lot about patience and saving up for something(he saved for ages to have enough for a lab puppy and has trained it). They are only allowed on them instead of TV. We lump everything into screen time. We don't have XBoxes Wii etc as non of us are that bothered and I'd rather we did other stuff collectively. Never say never though and I don't think they're any worse than a game on a pc.

When adverts come on 9 times out of 10 my dc call the toys on show trash as we have explained the majority will break and are overpriced. We have explained the advertising men want your money. They never ask for anything they see on TV. They only have toys at Xmas and bdays so know asking isn't an option anyway.They never whinge to go on their DS and quite often they lie unplayed with for a few days.

My Dc go to bed when I say,eat what I serve up and watch what TV I think is ok and switch it off when I say. They very rarely argue as they know it's fair and they get their screen time albeit limited. Sadly they argue about plenty of other things though.Sue Palmer does point out I think (either in TC or elsewhere)that parents should call the shots.

I think children should have exposure to these things and learn that a little is ok otherwise you can bet your bottom dollar the ones who haven't been taught a bit of self control as have never had access to such items will be the ones up in their bedrooms for hours on electronic equipment come teenage years when they are earning their own money. They are growing up in a world surrounded by it after all.

All this aside I have 3 bright, articulate,imaginative children.My 6 year olds are very fluent readers. They are all book mad and actually ask for new books far more than anything electronic. To be frank they'd also sooner rather read a book more often than not than any of the above so clearer exposure to said items does no harm if balanced correctly.

I actually think all of my dc have learnt masses from TV,computers and their DS's. They have learnt things I know they didn't get from the books we read -general knowledge and some quite imaginative things in play. I also think you'd be shocked at how interactive schools are these days. The stuff my dd's rec class was doing in their computer suite was staggering. Every lesson also seems to have some involvement with the interactive white board which are amazing teaching aids.

I do think under 6's are too young for Ds's. My dd5 would like one but she won't be having one until she turns 6 like her brothers. I'm glad my boys had 6 good years of quality play with toys, I do think it's given them a good grounding and what some of their take it or leave approach to electronic stuff is down to. I also think under 6's just don't get the most out of them. I didn't like any of those electronic toys when my dc were little,they had a couple but I far preferred the toys that made them do something instead of distracting them with lights and sounds. Our Lego and Playmobil still gets far more use than any of the above.

thumbwitch · 30/11/2009 21:42

I think TV contributes to the rich tapestry of life

nighbynight · 06/12/2009 06:47

Have had a nasty cold, so just got back to read this thread.

Like most people, I don't want to deny my children all screen time, but I must admit I am fed up with screens of various sorts.
My children have just worked out the password to the computer, and for the last few days, have been on it non-stop. So, obviously now that I am better, that will change again!

I have decided to take the TV cable to work with me each day. I come home at 6pm, and they can have the tv in time for them to watch their favourite programme at 7 (a long running serial about some children looking for treasure).
It is better this way, so that the Au Pair won't be pestered by constant nagging to be allowed to watch TV during the day. Who knows, the screen junkies children may even pick up a book.

I agree with whoever said that social networking and how to take care in chat rooms are skills that they should learn - but I have yet to see any benefits to nintendos and the like. People come up with examples like My son had this amazing program for learning about colours/maths/english/shapes, but in fact there's nothing on hand held gaming things that isn't just a simulation of real life.

Laura, thank you for asking - no, ds is still awake late. I have started to read to him in the evening though - we are going through my old Biggles books. After Ive finished reading, I turn the light out. Occasionally it works. But we have finally managed to get good extra tutoring for him, so I am hoping he will soon feel better about the school.

OP posts:
LauraIngallsWilder · 06/12/2009 21:39

Nighbynight - taking the cable to work is a great idea!

What is the long running serial called? It sounds so much like my favourite cartoon when I was a kid! I think it was called "Children of the Sun" It was fab

motherlovebone · 06/12/2009 22:28

we dont have a TV, do have a portable dvd, laptop and a nintendo ds.
DD has to ask before using ds, not something she uses in the week, or even every weekend.
i think tv is a pile of shit, but i do worry that she may seem odd to her peers.
i wouldnt rule out getting a tv, but likea previous poster said, got better things to spend the money on.

cory · 06/12/2009 23:03

Didn't have a TV when the children were little, do now but we ration viewing as a family. Wouldn't want to be without it now that dcs are growing up tbh; I like good films myself, so it's something I want my children to grow up to enjoy.

Don't have WIIS or gameboy, but both children have saved up and bought Nintendos. The main benefits ime are distraction: takes ds's mind off his car sickness and dd's off her aching back. And for both, provides a bit of mindless relaxation after a hard day- same function as filled by Mumnset in my case.

Computer access absolutely essential imo once they reach secondary school: so many projects and so much essay writing.

Screen time sounds like it's bound to be a bad thing, because we tend to hear it in the context of toxic children. But screentime can be all sorts of things: is reading Mills & Boons (or whatevery they're called these days) really more educational than watching Laurence Olivier? Planet Earth isn't exactly trash, is it? Using a laptop for writing your first novel isn't what I would call uncreative.

It's all about balance. I wouldn't feel pushed to buy something just because others have it, but wouldn't jump to conclusions about families that do have things you do not either. All part of life's rich tapestry.

nighbynight · 07/12/2009 21:59

Laura - it is called Haus Anubis. We are in Germany, and there's quite a lot of good stuff for older children here.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread