Help 9 year old wearing me out

[laurasarah]

My problem is my 9 year old.

She has terrible trouble getting to sleep.

I put her up at 9pm (quite reasonable for a 9 year old I think) and she is up and down the stairs (sometimes 3 and 4 times a night) saying anything from I cant sleep to I'm too hot etc. The thing is she is so tired the next day and I have to wake her up for school.

I have tried just about everything. Even went to the doctors who presribed piriton which helped but I dont want to continue to give her this as it is a drug at the end of the day.

Shes very hitty missy some nights she will fall asleep quite easily and others it takes hours. Eventually I just go to bed myself and tell her that thats it she just has to try.

Funny thing is though that if I go up to bed and watch television in my room she tends to just go to sleep but if I sit downstairs she is up and down like a yo-yo!

I am finding it really draining as my hubby works away part of the week and I am so exhausted by 9pm I just want some peace.

On top of this she is just so ratty all the time because shes tired.

Any advice or tips.

What worked for me - so of course not saying will help but if you have not already tried these then maybe give them a go and also you need to be consistent (can imagine you are already but it's so tiring that you can easily give up I did time and time again until in the end I stopped myself as I felt the alternative just wasn't any good either). So things that worked for me, gradually move the clock slightly from the moment she comesin from school/tv programmes finish, so that bedtime is actually earlier than it should be (ie clocks say 8pm when it's only 7pm). Do this even in the holidays, slipping back for an easy life only made it harder to adjust again. No tv or screens of any kind an hour before bed. (Food is another area we looked at and adjusted. this possibly helped not sure.)

Giving up the first 30-45-60mins of the evening to stay with dd in bed, lights down gradually, we have a dimmer switch. Quiet music only eg classical or story tapes, or there are cds now that are lovly about mediating but they just talk you through being calm and quiet and imagining nice things. And finally but the thing that I first started using and it made a big difference, getting loads of cream on your hands (we have to use E45) and just putting on dd legs and finally arms very slowly almost like a massage but I can't massage over and over I suppose twice each limb.

If you haven't tried any before, hope these help. Our DD used to complete take up our time so others had not time. Now goes to bed on her own and, apart from once every few months definately not more often, settles down on her own. Reading books or doing puzzle books helped a bit but was always hit and miss. By the way, it was a strict rule that we only talked for the first 10 mins after that I would leave the room and put up with the usual up down in out. It was funny at first not talking after the 10 mins and in a way her giggling about this but me having to keep a straight face helped with the change ie stay in bed and get yourself settled. Really hope this helps as I really have worn the t-shirt til it fell off my back it was so worn out!

Thanks Rey

Will give all of these a go, anything is worth a try.

Hugs X

laurasarah, was rushing but hopefully you made sense of it all as I have just re-read and besides missing or extra letters making it hard to read (my keyboard sticks at times) I just rattled it all out as fast as I could so punctuation is not there half the time! Anyway, best of luck. I suppose looking back it was more a case of teaching her how to settle down again, something with her stubborness that had gradually disappeared. Now our dd is a delight again and I am not afraid to pop my head round to turn off the light completely. Something I could not do for a long time as it would interrupt the winding down for the night process. In fact I did the clock thing recently because she had had a few busy evenings and I felt she could really do with an early night and she got such a good nights sleep that she woke up 30 minutes earlier than usual but I only knew because she had her light on and was doing some art stuff (on a school day too). So stick in there and I really hope it works for you too. Hugs x