Is it more than normal sibling rivalry?

[BikiniBottom]

My seven-year-old dd wrote me and her dad a letter today saying she is really upset as she thinks her 5-year-old brother bullies her. I thought it was normal sibling rivalry and perhaps it is but I am not sure what to do about it and actually feeling profoundly depressed about it. I have only witnessed the normal bickering but I do see her shouting things like "fine! you have it then" or words to that effect. I have seen a little bit of pushing and stamped on it. But from my observations she can also be mean to him in the way that 7-year-old girls are so good at. She says he swars at her and kicks her and makes her life a misery.

I told her it was good she had written this letter to tell us as she has a habit of bottling things up and that we would work it out but it may not be immediate. The truth is I have no idea what to do. I am always worring about mydcs and recenly been concerned that my ds has been jealous of our one-year-old and not happy.

Any advice would be so gratefully received.

it was anti bullying week last week at our school, is this relevant do you think???

I'm no expert, but have 7 and 5 yr dd's. Ask her for examples of why she thinks he is bullying her, and then ask her what she thinks she/you should do (our school were advocating the 5 T's, I think one of them was talk....).

The book, 'Siblings without rivalry' by Feber I think is so far good, I'm half way through....it's by the same people who wrote 'How to talk to kids so they listen and listen to kids so they talk', which I'm also half way through.

I think as long as you take her feelings seriously and don't dismiss them you are doing well. Good Luck, Cass.

(will be watching this thread for help with my 2 bickering daughters too.....

Thanks cass. It was anti-bullying at ours too and tbh its relevance has crossed my mind too. I guess I am just worrying that a. they will have a bad relationship with each other and b. I am not seeing that my ds is a bully.