How many of your children have actually played today?

[princessmel]

ds is such a wafter. Floating around not getting into any games or playing with toys. He says 'what shall I play?' 'I don't know what to play' A LOT.
He's happy if he's playing a board game with someone (I played 2 games of snakes and ladders with him and dd earlier), or if he's doing an activity with me/dh ( we did spellings earlier and then they helped me put all the washing on the airers) or if he can have screen time. ds , wii, laptop, tv etc. We limit this screen time eg He has been on the wii today with a friend for the first time in 2 weeks.

He usually plays fine if he has a friend over.
In nice weather he'll go on the trampolene. Bike sometimes. He does do quite a few pictures/drawings.

He has a lot of toys, that are easily reached and organised. He has a 4year old sister to play with too. She's slightly better at playing btw. With babies, dressing up etc

He does play from time to time, but it seems there are a lot of times when he's not. And it's just so frustrating. He sits and flops and moans about wanting to go on the ds/wii/watch tv etc. Or just that 'he doesn't know what to do'

He has a list as long as anything of things he would like for christmas, but I am not buying toys that he wont play with.

He does play first thing in the morning, with dd.

I do suggest things, give him ideas, offer to get things out. In truth he'd rather he had a friend over, or was at a friends all the time, or if I/dh was doing something/anything with him all the time. But that's not possible.

Anyone elses dc's like this??

(sorry for rambling post)

DS is like this - he's 3. How old is yours? He just doesn't get any kind of imaginative play, i.e. playing with pirates, toy monsters etc. He's only into making stuff with a lot of help from me or building stuff e.g. lego. He's just got into playing games on the laptop and can't get enough of it.

I think it's quite a boy thing.

He is going to be 7 in Jan.

He CAN play lovely games. But not very often and they don't last very long...
He also bosses dd and gets shouty/angry at her if they are actually playing something. This is normal I suppose with big brothers bossing younger siblings around.

He LOVES it when my sis is here and her dh, or my mum and they play things or give him tons of attention. Then I feel guilty , but they are not here all wth them the time so he's a novelty to them!!!
He also loves playing football with dh or doing anything that is led by me or anyone. Like craft kits, painting models, cooking, doing games and puzzles with me, books, going out, anything!!!! If I had endless £££££ then I'd buy loads of craft/models to paint/make etc. I'm looking forward to when he can read books (more than school readers) and sit and read a Horrid Henry!!

Picante, when he was 3, he'd play a bit more. With cars and his Bob the builder things etc.

I thought that this was gonna be a thread about doing too many ExC activities: . We've had trampolening, errands including library, skating and swimming. DD involved in all, but at least DSs had some breaks.

Ds is happy doing organised things like that. He does football and swimming and that's enough for us. Money wise and time wise.

It's when he's left to his own devises that he struggles.

Oh and yes we've just had a new baby, but it's not to do with that. He's been like this for AGES! years....

ds is like this , he is just about to turn 5. He does have a lot of imagination but they are always games that need someone else. As he is an only child, he spends loads of time lying on the floor sucking his thumb and waiting for me to do stuff with him.

Today has been looooong day. he spent some time with dh this morning but then dh went out for the day.

We went to the library, then into town to get some stuff for making a cake and have lunch. Then he watched 2 dvds as I made a cake for my mum's birthday tomorrow and generally cleared up, did some laundry etc (he didn't want to help until it was time to decorate the cake). then I had a bit of a sit down while he finished watching his 2nd dvd

Then the Tv went off and I played with him for about an hour (mostly having him climb on me or pretending to be a superhero (yawn!) or chasing and tickling, then a pillow fight)

Then I made dinner and he started being annoying as he was bored and getting in the way, refusing to entertain himself etc.

The we ate dinner, cleared up, decorated the cake (it certainly looks interesting to say the least but ds enjoyed making it)

Now we are having 2 short (10 min) episodes of little princess then bed.

We have had LOADS of screen time today, much more than usual but the weather is awful and i can't take him swimming as my skin always flares up after ging swimming and it is bad at the moment

earlier today 10yo played with a friend

we all played scrabble (I won)

17yo is playing with her UCAS form

dog is in deep depression about the weather

Boy has played lots today, but played on his own, not much. Wanted my attention a lot. Somedays he will get on with own thing, other not.

i think the stage just before they become fluent readers can be a really tough one. does he have any comic books? we found they bridged the gap quite nicely.

7y DD has played for a bit today, athough we have been out a fair while so not as much time, and she watched a film with DH. She is generally really god at playing and entertaining herslf - she has to be as an only child I guess.

She spent about 40 minutes making up songs using her different musical instrument type toys.

And about same length of time playing with toys upstairs - was either Barbie stuff or Animal Hospital, nto sure which.

She also played a lot this morning with her best friend - she was sleeping over there and they got up VERY early!

gecko 2.9
has largely played with a cow torch for the most of today...taking the dog through the hallway because he was scared of the dark...taking me to the kitchen incase the light went out and I was scared of the dark...looking under couch for treasure...shining it in sisters eyes

and peppa pig pjigsaw puzzles

All of mine, pretty much all of the time. I only get the occasional "I'm bored. What shall I do?"

I put this down to the fact that I deliberately ignored my dc from a very early age. Someone called it 'benign neglect'. If you don't entertain them all the time, they learn to entertain themselves.

Ds2 (my dc3) was a very demanding baby, and I gave in to him, paying him a lot more attention than I would have otherwise done. The result: a child who doesn't like to play alone, always needs someone there, even if only as an audience.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't abandon my dc. I played and interacted with them a lot. But I also gave them the opportunity to entertain themselves.

Pretty candles my mum says that to me alot.
She really goes on about it. And I agree what you say is true. BUT I really do give them a lot of opportunity to occupy themselves.
I do, I do!! And always have done! But he still says 'what shall I do' etc.
I think if ds had a brother close in age he might be different.

DS1 is nearly 6 and DS2 is 3
they have played all day except for an hour and a half when they drove with DH to pick up my car from the garage.

they have a huge cardboard box in the sittingroom which has been defence battlements for protection against lazer attacks, a car to sit in and eat sugarpuffs.

they have also run around like loons, ALOT.

cabin fever definately as it has been piss poor weather all day.

I go for the "benign neglect" approach as well.

I let ds go off and do his own thing, and he plays very well independently. I also spend at least an hour a day actively playing with him, and have a good half hour of bedtime stories. But he entertains himself for about three hours of the day, usually with imaginative games.

Like Pretty Candles, I don't abandon him though. I might be ironing, and he'll come wandering past and ask if I want anything from the shops, then trundle off with his little trolley, or he'll deliver me a letter and so on.

I think the trick to encourage independent play is to deliberately enable it wherever possible at a young age, but also to limit or completely remove TV/Wii/DS, etc. IMO screen time destroys imagination and play, and it's very addictive.

DS does get bored, he is 2. Today I made play-do and he actually played with that for about 30 mins. Quite impressed, he usually struggles, and as it was a rainy day I was worried.

My eldest, 12, cannot occupy himself unless it involves a screen. As I'm fairly strict about this it means he spends large portions of time just hanging about.

He plays fantastic games with his little brothers (a sort of bartering system with seeds today) and with his sister (when he's not trying to kill her). He'll still trail around playing 'daddy' to her 'mummy' for example but he can't/won't entertain himself. Now he's getting bigger he can be quite intimidating too and it really gets on my wick.

benign neglect

definitely

I've never made sure there were activities to do

they're kids
they can make a game out of a hairbrush and an empty loo roll

how can a 2 year old get bored?

seriously
does he not just squirel around in everything he's allowed and maybe stuff he isn't
till he finds something to play with

i dunno, like a hoover hose, hairbrush, torch, empty box....

or go and get his favourite jigsaw, noisy toy, cuddly toys to have a picnic or run over

A 2yo gets bored when he is either used to being played with, or does not have suitable toys available. By available I mean that he can get for himself without adult involvement. And by suitable toys I mean anything that the adult doesn't feel has to be taken away.