Hi - don't often start threads, so be gentle ....
My 9 and 6 year old sons have their own rooms. DS1s room is bigger, and he spends more time in there as he really enjoys playing on his own - Lego etc
DS2s room smaller, and he doesn't really play with toys on his own very much. When it's just them, they often play together in each other's rooms, but DS1 also at times wants to be on his own - fair enough. I have encouraged the idea of each of them needing their own space, and the other respecting this.
Problem arises when both have friends round to play - this is always 2 brothers. On these occasions, DS1 gets very territorial - won't let the younger ones in his room, starts off shouting and says they can't come in as they'll mess his room up and break things. This results in a row, and upset ....
His rudeness puts my back up so I can't be objective about whether this is reasonable or not. I would like them all to be able to play together (which is what the other children seem to want too), and for DS1 to be more gracious.
How would/do you deal with this :
- Avoid the situation in the first place on the grounds that DS1 finds it difficult ?
- Make a rule that older ones play with older ones, and younger with younger, in seperate rooms
- Insist they play together ?
- Something else ? eg DS1 draws up some ground rules if others are to come into his room, so he feels more in control ...