Why does he do this and how do we handle it?

[Fabster]

DS1 has been sent to his room a couple of times tonight and is now in bed. He is 8. A few minutes ago I went in to check on him as I heard a big bang. He was on the floor and refused to get back into bed and told his Dad and I he hated us. Then he was crying. Usually I will get it out of him that something is wrong or something has happened at school or he will just tell me to go away. I asked him if something had happened and he shouted NO! so I have left him.

I can't assume there is something wrong every time he behaves unacceptably as that would be all the time.

He is now banging on the bedroom floor.

To his eternal shame my DS2 once scratched "I hate mum" into his headboard when I sent him to his room. He was 8.
I'd wait until he calms down completely then make him laugh. Talk about why he did it later.

I know he doesn't hate me really so I am not too phased but that comment.

He is asleep now so we will see how he is in the morning.

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Brilliant idea, bloss.

I think I will write that and put it in his room to find when he gets up in the morning.

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I wrote a note for him. I added help me help you and also put that I love him and nothing will change that. He didn't see the note so I had to give it to him.

He said he was feeling sad and what was bothering him was me interrupting him. I promised to not interrupt if he could promise to listen to me better.

I think it worked a treat. Thank you

I will definitely use the note idea again.

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I hope to find some time to fully read the book before the kids leave home .

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I am currently ignoring my 4 year old when he is going on and on whinging and eventually he does stop so I guess that works but don't think to do it with the older ones.