I have a DS age 9 and DTDs who are nearly 6 and have been a single parent for about 3 years(their Dad is on the scene, sees them often and offers his support when he can).
When I had 3 under the age of 4, I coped just fine. Was exhausted, but contented, confident and happy. Everyone used to say to me then 'how do you cope?' and I often replied 'piece of piss'...and I meant it!
I felt confident, guided by my instincts, had tons of patience and just found being a mum great and quite easy really....I had finally found my calling, and was proud of myself . Continued to feel like this up until about a year ago.
Then,I lost my way.
It seems that now, I haven't got a bloody clue what I'm doing a lot of the time . At least, that is how I feel at the moment. I get angry a lot, I have lost my strength and belief in what I am doing as a parent. Where has all that patience gone? Where are my instincts? What happened to my confidence? I miss the old me....where is she?
A lot of stressful things have happened to me over the past few years, I guess they are finally taking their toll...affecting my parenting...the one thing I was really proud of...really good at.
I would love to know if anyone else feels like this? Like going backwards. Isn't it supposed to be getting easier the older they get? (Just wanted to add that they are good kids...it's me that has the problem.)
Just wanted to get that out.
Self pitying, muddled rant over