Is 8.5 hours of school a day, too much for a 4.5 year old ?

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, my daughter goes to school with a little girl who lives down the road from us. They are in reception together. I was talking to her mum the other week and she mentioned that her daughter was in school for 8:30am and there until 5pm every school day, because she and her husband work full time. My daughter starts at 9am and finnishes at 3pm, that's what most of them do.
I personally think that is a very long day for this little girl.
I'm thinking of asking the mum wether she'd like me to pick up her daughter some days at 3pm and bring her to ours to play until she comes home from work, then I could walk her home. She has stayed at ours before on her own.
It wouldn't be set days though, as my husband and I both work shifts.
I don't want to appear interfearing or judgemental, as I know they have to work.
I just think it'd be nice for both my daughter and hers.

The little girl is probably used to it though. Babies can be at nursery all day from 6 weeks.

Well, I do think it's a bit long, but many children do it - it's up to each family to work out what's best for them, maybe they don't have any choice.

Why don't you just offer to collect her DD one afternoon, as a one off. If it's successful then you can do it again. You don't have to suggest it as a way of relieving the time she is at school, just a casual invite, followed by more. I'm sure she'd be delighted - I would!!

Yes, good point strongblackcoffee. I'll do that and see how we get on.
They are both only children, so it'd be good for both of them.

a long day at nursery is different for all sorts of reasons (mostly the chance to have a nap in the middle of the day)

remember that the breakfast and after-school clubs won;t be school though - they are much less structured and include much more free play and probably tv.

Do casually invite the child round though, it will be nice for everyone.

She does seem happy enough, I know she's been going to nursery from a very young age too. I don't think my daughter would want to spend any longer there than she had to.

Would the school mind if her mum just mentioned one morning that she wouldn't be staying for the after school club, or would they need more notice?

The bit after 3pm won't be school school, though.

You can ask whether X would like to come to play after school one day and offer to pick her up at 3pm with your DD, and then if it works out suggest it some more. There's no need to phrase it as a "it must be so hard for your DD being in wraparound childcare" thing.

They won't mind, but she'd probably still be charged. It will depend on the setup how much notice she's need to give to avoid being charged, and could be that she has to specify which slots she wants on a termly basis so would have to pay however much notice there is.

The after school bit is free! You only pay if it's something like tennis or ballet etc.

My word...

Yes, it is good. It's hany for us to know that in an emergency, she could stay longer at school.
She's just started an environmental club every wednesday from 3-4:30pm. That is also free as it's run by her teachers.
You can't fault it really.