Hi guys. Sorry this may be a long whingy post
My DD has been having speech therapy and we are trying a new more direct approach. So the speech therapist explained what i should do and ive been trying my best at home every day. I have to record her progress on a scale of 1-10 each day as well as doing the set task and we see the therapist each week. She always asks me to show her how ive been doing it and gives me her feedback which i do find really helpful.
Today i took DD there and was very happy and positive as we have had a good week speech-wise iykwim (its for a stammer) However i wasn't feeling very well at all (6 months pregnant) and DD was tired and a bit unco-operative so when we started the session to show the therapist what we had been doing it didn't go very well. Therapist kept picking me up on things i was missing which just made me annoyed at myself because i know i can do it at home. and then eventually she suggested she take over so she did. DD refused to do things that i had told the therapist she had been doing really well this week. I felt awful about that and ill as well.
Then she tells me ive been recording the progress wrong too. I feel like such an idiot, like ive let my DD down because i cant seem to follow instructions and i wasn't concentrating properley today. I feel like the last 2 weeks of hard work have been pointless. I feel embarassed because i look as awful as i feel today and she must have thought i am just rubbish at the speech therapy/not trying like its not important to me or something.
She is really nice and was understanding, i told her i felt that the session didn't go very well and apologised but she said we are doing really well. Hmm you know when you can just tell that people are saying things to make you feel better....
Sat here in tears now, feeling like a rubbish mum and wondering how my poor DD will ever overcome this speech thing with me "helping" her.
DF has been on the phone trying to reassure me as i have to pull myself together for work in an hour He keeps saying its just an off day, the home sessions have been great and i shouldn't worry about it etc. I can't stop worrying about the therapist thinking im a total idiot. We have seen improvement in DD's speech so i keep trying to focus on that but its not working.
I guess im just after someone to tell me its not so bad. I know my hormones are playing up but its so important to me that we help DD through this little blip with her speech. Thanks for reading, feel better already for getting it off my chest.