How do you know/find out if your child has learning difficulties/special needs?

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My son is 2.8 and can't talk. He speaks like an 18mth old in single words which only the family can understand.

He's had a hearing test (they said he may have fluid in his ear, but nothing serious, are keeping an eye on him) and is starting speech therapy twice a week at playschool as of next week.

Nursery and the speech therapist keep mentioning the phrase 'speech delay' but feel like HV, speech therapist and hearing doctor are all being very vague about WHY he can't talk.

He does understand a lot, he communicates through mime and these single words, he've very affectionate and he is understanding more and more each day, as well as trying new words which they've said is all good.

However, I just cannot believe that there is not something 'wrong' with him. He's a big strapping nearly 3yr old who talks and points like a baby...surely this suggests that he has learning difficulties?

If he has what do I do? How do I find stuff like this out?

Grandparents and friends keep saying 'oh, there's nothing wrong with him, he'll catch up etc' but I feel like they are dismissing the fact that there's a very good chance that he's going to end up needing extra care and being a child with special needs.

glad you're feeling better for having "talked" it through online. wee tip - if you can't be bothered explaining about the speech delay to random strangers then just say "he's shy/doesn't like talking to strangers".

I had one like the OP and unfortunately it does make you really anxious despite everyone saying he's just lazy, he'll catch up etc etc. We went to see paediatricians, SALTs etc who said that they thought it probably was speech delay but they would'nt know if there was any developmental delay, special needs until he was nearer 3-4 years old so it was a waiting game also the reasons often don't become apparent until they are older. He had weekly speech therapy from 3years for a year and he was much better. Now he has a review every 6 months and the school has a programme to follow for his speech. His speech is still slower than his peers but he is developmentally normal.
IMHO I would get his overall global development checked out by a paediatrician (GP can refer you) as speech delay can sometimes be part of an other condition.