What's the WORST parenting advice you've ever been given?

[MrsMerryHenry]

Both from professionals and well-meaning friends.

DH and I were ROFLing today about how having a talkative child apparently means they're ready to get rid of nappies.

That DD would have a higher IQ if I FF her and BF was no good.
That was my Dad's friend.

My SIL said I should dip DD's dummy in jam to stop her crying

Feed the baby every 4 hours
Don't pick the baby up when she cries
That baby needs some solid food, you were having egg and chips by that age (4 months?)

all from my mother

An aunt told me to give my 4 month old DD a piece of steak to chew on.

At the same time, this aunt told me to rub DD's eyelids. That way she'll go to sleep as she won't be able to open her eyes. Err right-o

When DD was about 3 months old we moved to a new area, the advice from the new HV was to join lots of baby groups to make new friends but "Don't tell anyone you're a single parent until you have already established friendships with them, as it will put people off"

When DH was a tiny baby the HV told his mother to give him condensed milk 'cos her yorkshire terriers thrived on it

Funnily enough she ignored that one

my HV suggested locking my then 8 month old dd in her bedroom and ignoring her until morning, responding to my query about how to get her to sleep through

If you want a baby to sleep through the night just add baby rice to its bottle. At 4 weeks old.

Chookkeeper - I know someone from Australia who was fed condensed milk as a baby.

Picking up a crying baby is spoiling them allegedly.

Indigestion during pregnancy is a sign that you have a hairy baby.....

And a tot of whisky will see them right when they are teething.

"All babies are happier with a dummy".

Thank God DD spat it out when I was stupid enough to think MIL knew what she was talking about.

I now know that SOME children like a dummy and some don't.

dont pick up too often- it spoils them

l got the biting advice from mil when pregnant with dd1. dd2 and 3 later she is still trotting it out. And l still think that's rubbish advice.

A (childless) friend advised me to give DD a sugar cube to chew on to ease teething pain... Apparently that's what her mother did.

the force-feeding thing, definitely.. from so many people

'if she doesn't like it, just force it into her mouth. She'll get used to it eventually'

yes, because I want my toddler to have massive food issues!

Oh another one - probably second worse. We must put baby into her own room asap after being born, in a room as far away as possible with the door shut - this is essential so that I, as mother, can recover from the birth and get some much needed sleep without being disturbed by the baby crying.

MIL did this apparantly with her children on advice of a Doctor

Rindercella - the eyelids thing (or a varient of it, at any rate) worked for all my children when they were tired but fighting sleep, if you know what I mean. I used to stroke gently down between between their eyes, or blow gently on their eyelids, so that they closed. Usually once they were closed, they stayed closed, as long as they were tired enough. If they were fighting sleep, once their eyes were shut, they seemed to find it too hard to open them again.

My dad used to do it to me too, when I was a baby - he whistled gently and the air from his whistling made my eyes shut.

I don't think I've explained this very well, but it's that point when your eyelids are sooo heavy that you know if you shut them, you'll fall asleep - mine used to fight it at that stage, and that's when this worked.

I'll stop rambling now, shall I?

Not rambling sunnygirl - I understand exactly what you mean. I guess I was just very about anything my aunt said following her advice to get my 4 month old baby to chew on a bit of steak.

sunnygirl - I know exactly what you mean. You've just reminded me that when I was tired or so upset that I was sobbing my dad would lay me across his lap and gently blow on my forehead. This always made my close my eyes and calm me down/send me to sleep.

Of course if we tried it now (I'm rather a ahem - big girl) I would probably cripple him

my me close

Not advice, as such, but MIL told me dh was weaned on bones from the butcher - apparently her HV said chewing on a bit of marrow was good for the teeth.

My mother ordered dh out of the house to go and buy a proper baby bath on a proper stand when ds was newborn as she disapproved of us bathing ds in a support in the bathroom. Apparently it's full of germs that leap out of the loo (not if you put the lid down when you flush, Mother!) and far too cold. Babies should be bathed in front of the fire.

Except we didn't actually have any fires, open, gas or electric, but we did have central ruddy heating!

Only feed a one-week old 9-pounder every four hours and if he requires milk more often, give him sugared water.

From a midwife!

HVs are so weird, aren't they?

I must say, I do agree with the 'don't cuddle a crying baby' advice. Imagine if you were deeply upset and feeling isolated. The last thing you'd want would be loving human contact to reassure you, right?

TW - your poor DN! That's awful . I think I would have just sympathised hugely and shared examples of when I was left out as a child, then taken my child out somewhere special for the day.

Poor darling.

Sunny, I like that trick - makes lots of sense