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Parenting

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Naked kids on the beach - would you let them?

388 replies

ssd · 30/05/2005 17:52

I mean would you let your say 6 year old play naked on the beach?

Today thanks to the sun at last we went to the beach, it was fairly busy. A family next to us let their approx. 6 year old boy play around the waters edge naked for a while before the cold got to him and he put on pants as in underpants. The other kids ages about 3 - 9 years old were playing in their underpants (all boys).

Now I'm not prudish but I don't think its acceptable to let a child play on a beach naked, nor would I want an older child playing in his pants. My ds1 would never play and run around in front of strangers in only his pants and he's 7, the other kids I mean were older than him.

I don't care what anyone does at home or in their garden, but I'd want them dressed more appropriately at a beach.

What do you think?

OP posts:
Hulababy · 31/05/2005 21:52

Not really had chance to read all this through, but those who allow their children to play naked outside in the sun - what about burning and sun exposure? That is what concerns me most, and I don't fancy having to cover DD everywhere with suncrea, - which in itself is not exactly the most comofrtable thing to have slathered all over you anyway.

morocco · 31/05/2005 22:07

I know what you mean hulababy and am normally pretty uptight about sun exposure too although I tend to the view that a short period of time exposed is good for vit d and not a big risk of skin cancer
guess that also depends where you live though - if I was in NZ I'd be pretty paranoid about it to be sure
you'd be lucky to get 10 minutes warm enough to want to strip to the altogether in Blighty though

Caligula · 31/05/2005 22:58

Sorry, I have to nag away like with a scar. I simply don't think it's valid to say that something which might make someone else uncomfortable is inappropriate. Some people are very uncomfortable about the sight of two adults kissing in public. Should it never be done then?Some people are uncomfortable about the sight of babies with dummies. Should babies therefore never be given dummies? Some people (like me) are uncomfortable about the sight of a child in a pink crop top with the word "sexy" written on it and a navel showing. Should that be banned then?

How on earth are we all supposed to know what will make a complete stranger, who we will never see again, uncomfortable? And why on earth should we adapt our (reasonable? normal? harmless?) behaviour to the hang-ups/ prejudices/ preferences of that person?

LGJ · 31/05/2005 23:00

Some people (like me) are uncomfortable about the sight of a child in a pink crop top with the word "sexy" written on it and a navel showing. Should that be banned then?

YES PLEASE

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:06

Coming in very late to this but, Caligula, you said "How on earth are we all supposed to know what will make a complete stranger, who we will never see again, uncomfortable?"

I didn't think "making complete strangers uncomfortable" was the problem; I thought it was exposing our small children to the very strangers who would not be uncomfortable, but would be over-interested? They are out there, sad but true.

It's awful that we should need to think about it like that, but we do.

tiffini · 31/05/2005 23:06

Children need to be taught to be comfortable with thier bodies, but at the same time they need to be taught to have some dignity.

For me i would not have a problem with a naked child on the beach unless they were older than the toddler age.

Gwenick · 31/05/2005 23:08

but I thought we'd already established that the risk to our children is no greater now than it was when we are children.

And most child pornography comes via child abuse, which 'generally' comes from within the family/families circle of friends.

A paedophile would be just as interested in your fully clothed child going to school as they would in a naked one running round the beach......

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:10

But Gwenick, it is much easier now for a child pornographer to take graphic pictures, with either camera or mobile phone, than it was 30 years ago.

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:11

No need to get the pics developed at a shop now....

Gwenick · 31/05/2005 23:11

but the risk to the 'child' is still exactly the same (in fact probably less as the awareness from the public is much higher now).

Someone taking photographs of your child will be JUST as interested in them running round in their little swimming costume/trunks/bikini as they would running round naked.

krist · 31/05/2005 23:12

My five year old just wouldnt got to the shy stay which is fine. However couldnt keep clothes on my two year old at the beach, but sand in a nappie or swimming nappie must hurt so i see his point of view and whats the harm sitting in the sand making sand castles if anyone tried to take a picture of him well im sure daddy would have sent the camera and person flying into the sea lol

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:12

You think?

Gwenick · 31/05/2005 23:14

No need to get the pics developed at a shop now....

30yrs ago I doubt very much whether people would have batted an eyelid at a picture of a naked child being developed in the shop, unless there was something OBVIOUSLY malicious about the photo. Got plenty of photo's of me as a child, developed at shops, completely naked,

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:14

Discreet camera, telephoto lens, download to internet, circulate - they just could not do that so easily a few years ago. OK serious porn can't be done eg on a beach, but you know what I mean - would you want anonymous men getting off on a snap of your child naked on a beach?

tiffini · 31/05/2005 23:16

gwenick

I agree, a paedophile will take an interest in a child that seems an easy target, regardless of how that child looks or what they are wearing.

This is only what seems obvious to me, i dont know, nor do i wish to know what goes on in the sick mind of a paedophile.

Gwenick · 31/05/2005 23:18

telephoto lens,

Errrr they've been around a VERY long time, my dad was using his telephoto lens a more than 30yrs ago...

Paedophiles don't ONLY want pictures of naked children to them your child in a swimming costume/trunks (or even school uniform) is JUST as 'attractive' to them as naked.....

And in amongst the photos my parents took of me naked on beaches I'm sure there's pictures of children we didn't know (also naked) on them too...

wordsmith · 31/05/2005 23:21

From the POV of morality/sexuality, I would be completely happy to let my kids play naked on the beach until whatever age they felt more comfortable covered up (probably about 7 or 8 I imagine). My only concern would be sun protection.

Lets' face it, there could be weirdos hanging around anywhere. But there probably aren't. A friend of mine stopped taking her child to our lovely park "because of the paedophiles" - there were no reports of any paedophiles at all! So her child was denied the opportunity to meet up with several other little friends on a regular basis, and gradually these friendships withered on the vine.

If we take this argument to its logical conclusion we would never leave the house for fear of paedophiles. I could cry when I think of my carefree childhood in the 60's and 70's in comparison with the restrained and coralled existence of many of today's kids. Where is the documented evidence that our kids are in any more dange these days than then?

Let them be as naked as they wish for as long as they like. There is nothing as liberating or enjoyable than the feel of the sun against your body. I wish I could be brave enough to strip of a bit more myself!

QueenEagle · 31/05/2005 23:21

I would take my kids to a naturist beach with no qualms. Except I hate the sand.

We are much happier going to our caravan which is in a naturist place and we all wander round naked to our hearts content.

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:22

30 years ago the equivalent telephoto lenses were about 2' long, hardly subtle, and the images taken would have to be laboriously developed and circulated by post, if at all.

Never mind. Obviously wasting my time. Dream on, Gwenick.

wordsmith · 31/05/2005 23:24

QE I have often been tempted to try a naturist holiday. DH would run a mile though. How do you find it?

Gwenick · 31/05/2005 23:26

Jan - trust me the distances that my father could stand and use his telephoto lense was WELL out 'easy spotting' range from, say a beach, he could easily have sat in the dunes (actually he was frequently found sat in the dunes and other 'odd' places LOL) taking pictures of things from quite a distance - and his lenses (which he only sold last year) were NOT 2' long!!!

Please don't patronise me. I know plenty about photography and what 'used' to be used and what is used 'now'. And we all have access to places that can confirm that the instances of child abuse (which is most often where the paedophile activity comes from) always has, and still does, come mostly from people our children know/trust or family

sykes · 31/05/2005 23:33

This is JUST an observation, but what are peopeles' thoughts about Ken Livingstone's announcement re parks in London re camera phones etc and being cautious about what you do/don't dress your children in?

krist · 31/05/2005 23:33

Kids expecially little girls run around in next to nothing in the summer anyway kids playing at the beach isnt the problem being able to buy fake playboy skirts and tops for a two year old is I know if I had a daughter I wouldnt dress her up like a little tart in plastic knee high boots I have seen then in cheep shops and kids wearing them surely that is worse, that a baby or young child playing

wordsmith · 31/05/2005 23:35

Gwenick it's nice to see the voice of common sense not being drowned out by the squeaks of paranoia.

I am as disgusted by paedophilia as the next mother, but it is very very rare. Stop reading the Sun and the News of the World and look at the real world. I refuse to let my or my kids' life be dictated by 0.0001% of the population.

Janh · 31/05/2005 23:38

Hadn't heard about it before, sykes - just did a search on the Guardian and found this - I think it's sad and sick but not surprising ( a neighbour with 2 teenage kids of his own was jailed this year for circulating child porn, after trying to blame his own kids and their friends. These are nasty, devious, creepy people.)