Co-sleeping

[mum2b09]

My DD is 3 months old and over the past few weeks i have been putting her in her cot at night but after her night breastfeed she falls back asleep in ed with me and have unintentionally started co-sleeping.

She is next to me in the bedwith the cot pushed up with the side down so theres no chance of her falling out of bed and shes not next to my patner.

I have read some articles about co-sleeping being safer than crib or cot sleeping when practised safely.. I was always told it was dangerous??

Anyone shed an light on the matter??

oh and neither me and my partner drink or smoke and we dont allow smoking in our home

My understanding is that co-sleeping is safe if:

1. There is no smoking in your home, neither of you smoke or spend time around smokers, and 2) Neither of you have drunk alcohol or taken any drugs that may alter your awareness (prescription or recreational).

Other risk factors are if either or both of you are severely obese or suffer sleep apnoea (which you may not know, but bad snoring is a risk factor for sleep apnoea).

It is not clear whether the idea that co-sleeping is dangerous is fully backed up by scientific study. A bit difficult to do ethically!

However, there is evidence that co-sleeping, particularly when the mum is breatsfeeding, helps newborns to regulate their temperature and breathing. There is no evidence that babies overheat in bed with their parents, even if they get under the quilt. Parents - and again bfing mums in particular - tend to adopt protective postures around the sleeping baby.

Enjoy the intimacy with your dd.

I'm a co-sleeper and have been since DS was about 2 months ols he is now 9mths. It was the only way I could get any sleep as DS has always been a cuddly baby.

Co-sleeping is safe if you follow what PrettyCandles has said and yes there is evidence to suggest that co-sleeping helps to prevent SIDS by regulating and stimulating the baby's breathing.

SIDS can happen with co-sleeping though, although it is not caused by co-sleeping, it is just one of those things so you need to be aware of how you would feel if SIDS did happen. Would you blame yourself because you had been Co-sleeping?

yes, i know if it happened while i was co-sleeping that i would blame myself. but id blame myself if it happened while she was in her cot.

When ds2 was tiny there were a few occasions when I found myself wide awake and watching him in the night, but knew that he hadn't actively called me. Each time he looked perfectly peaceful, but would suddenly take a gasp of air, and I realised that when I woke he had not been breathing. Of course I don't know for how long his breathing had paused, or whether it had happened without waking me, but I am convinced that my Mother-Radar caused me to wake at that moment. I don't want to make out that I prevented a cot death, just to show how alert you are to your baby when they are so close to you.

BTW, this never happened with either of my other two (older) children, and I was not particularly anxious about this one.

mum2b, I'm sure you can find a lot of pro-co-sleep info on the net (www.askdrsears.com for example). If you learn to breastfeed lying down, you'll find the feeding interruption at night a doddle to deal with. And if you're worried that you might cause probs for later on, just remember that you can change anytime you want to stop.
My advice: Go for it!

There is a really good book called 'Three in a Bed' by Deborah Jackson which is very interesting and explains safety issues if you want some reassurance. It took me quite a while to relax while co-sleeping but now it seems the most natural thing in the world.

You say that you have pushed the cot up against your bed so that she can't fall out. We did this but then later took the side of the cot nearest the bed off so that DS could be moved into his own space when we needed more room for ourselves which has worked really well for us!! (IYSWIM - Also we had to change the level of cot so that the matresses were the same height!)

Hello,
I'm a newbie here, and my due date is coming fast on 31.3., just a day after full moon so fingers crossed I won't have to wait too long.
I'm planning to co sleep with my baby and bought a bedside cot as well. However, my question is about having the baby in our bed with me. I know that I can't prop my baby's head by a pillow, but what about the duvet? Obviously I will need to keep warm, so how do I manage to put duvet across myself and at the same time keep it off the baby (I'm assuming that's what I need to do). The baby will be in a sleeping bag, so do I put him on top of the duvet next to me with any additional baby blankets on top of him should he need it?
Please let me know any of you expereinced co sleeping parents.
Many thanks!
Eva

Hello,

My baby daughter is 10 months old and we cosleep. I sleep in the middle with my husband to my left and my baby to my right. The duvet covers my husband and MOST of me but I leave my right shoulder and arm uncovered. My baby sleeps just below the crook of my right arm in her own little sleeping bag. The duvet does not go near her. She does not fall out of bed because my arm is alongside her; she sleeps between my body and my arm.

I would be interested to hear from parents who coslept but whose children moved to their own beds later without great difficulty. Please say there are such people!

Cantthink - in answer to your question about keeping warm; I wore a think T-shirt under pyjamas which was easy to lift up and had warm layers over my bottom half. I kept our top halves free of duvets and DD was never cold, although she only ever wore pyjamas, with no sleeping bag in a fairly cold room. I shared a double bed with DH and DD, but we had two single quilts, so that he could pull his up to his ears without smothering us.

Seaglow both my babies coslept with me every night until around 9 months. With both I put them one night in their own room and they slept straight through - both excellent sleepers . I like to think it is because they associated sleep as a positive secure event and knew I would be there so were happy to do it alone. Could just be good luck though

I haven't tried to move DD, so she still sleeps with us at 3. Just too lazy to clear the spare cupboard room for her and can't face the thought of getting out of bed at night.