23 month age gap?? Anyone got experience of how managable this is??

[tryingtobemarypoppins]

Too late now I'm pregnant! But I am keen to know how you got on!

All I can say is there is 23 months between mine. The rest is a haze.

there is 23 monthes between mine

i thought i would manage with sling/single buggy/toddler walking combo but dd did not appreciate this when ds came along and so i got a phil and teds which was great not required now a year later but helped me through so keep an pen mind, i had the money put aside in case i needed a dbl but didnt buy till baby was here

try and aim for both to nap together, we do naps after lunch and if dd isnt napping its quiet time at least

dd was jealous when ds was born and did poke him a bit etc. which is normal and natural and to be expected (contray to my mils opinion ) but now doesnt really remember not having a baby brother and loves him tonnes they do squabble but both hate it if anyone else dares to mess with the other!

there are 22 months between me and my brother and i remember a fun childhood playing together so it should pan out ok

Im not going to lie, it was fecking hard. the first 9-12 months especially. dont expect too much in the first yr and after that things seem to roll into place a little better. good luck x

24 months here. Was fine. Actually in retrospect it was quite easy. But they both ate well and slept well and were hardly ever ill

tbh i dont think its that hard overall, there are some killer weeks like when dd had chicken pox, just recoveredjust started to get back on track when ds caught it, i was knackered then!

but on the flip side now ds is 1 they can be entertained by the same things unlike with bigger gaps where you have tom arrange seperate stuff, playdough/chalk drawing/dancing to nursery rhyme cds go down well for both of them

24mo and 4 days between DS1 and DD; just under 22 mo between DD and DS2.

It was totally fine. IMO the key is that child 1 is walking when child 2 is born (otherwise you have to carry 2 babies everywhere eg from car to house) If your gap is, say, 13mo this must be a problem. Also, yes, it helps if 2yo is sleeping.

(Also IMO) you don't need a double buggy with this gap thank goodness (I used sling then buggyboard) (I hate doubles but even I would have got one if faced, for example, with a pal's 14mo gap! )

Toddler keeps you busy, baby feeds, sleeps and err that's it at first. In a not very long time toddler is at nursery and the 2 of the play together so nicely .

I breastfed all 3 btw. I agree that 2yrs is a pretty standard gap. I have a lot of friends whose 2 children match mine IYSWIM.

Exactly 22 months between mine, its what we wanted and is the age gap between me and brother, so my mum said it would be hard at 1st but they'll be great playmates. I was expecting to barely cope, I had a friend who cried nearly every day for the 1st 3 months of DC2. So when my DC2 arrived I was pleasantly surprised, it was much easier than I expected. My older one, DS has always played independently do I'd encourage that, get them going with blocks, duplo or whatever and you can get on with new baby. I always had a stack of books ready when BF DD and we'd all cuddle up together!

The thing that I found a pain was the logistics of getting around! I used to love striding out all over the place with DS and taking one anywhere was quite easy, with two it takes a bit of getting used to. I had a safety 1st tandem double buggy, it was ok for the first 8 weeks but then the baby would get restless and seemed uncomfortable and DS was wanting to get out and run off!! It would stress me out when on my own. By the time the baby was 3 months I barely walked anywhere our saving grace was soft play once a week so DS could run wild safely and DD sat in car seat, cuddled, fed and eventually played in baby area. By the time DS was 2 and 1/2 he'd hop on and off a buggy board on the back of DD's buggy which was easier.

Their personalities will determine a lot of it, my DS would play by hiself and was never very cuddly or needy but was always running off and doing his own thing in public! DD was a cuddly baby but would sleep anywhere so did fit in with us. A bedside cot saved my life too as i fed her whilst practically asleep and luckily DS would sleep until at least 7am. I went back to work when DD was just 20 weeks and it was tiring but the fact that they were being entertained by nursery or grandparents 3 dayts a week did seem to make it more manageable. Now they are 2 and nearly 4 and great playmates, into the same things and I really want a 3rd! Enjoy it its a great time

Chonsenone why was your friend so upset?
I think I am going to have a hard tine getting DS walking everywhere he is very very cuddly then off and running everywhere! Nothing in between! I also quite like the idea of a buggy as they will both be in one place! I love walking too.

On another note, I am only 6/7 weeks and told close friends but I hate telling my parents! I think its the whole "they had sex" thing!!!!

23 months between my two - now 2.6 and 7 months.

It's been pretty good really. Ds1 is an angel anyway, and he still goes to the childminder one day a week which is a godsend, and gives me some time and peace with Ds2. It's also much easier to go into town etc with just one in tow.

The mistake I made was thinking that Ds2 would just 'fit in', as that's what everyone tells you. I assumed he would doze off in his bouncy chair or wherever, amidst Ds1's noise. Not so. He needed to be swaddled in his cot in the dark to sleep, and has always bene rubbish at sleeping in the buggy.

We also had a few hairy moments in the early days when both kids were yelling and I could only be with one, but they were few and far between.

On the whole though, it's been fine. And Bfing is perfectly possible and in fact much easier once you get going. Getting out of the door is challenging at the best of times, and not having to faff with formula is great.

Good luck and congratulations

Theres 2 years and 2 months between our eldest dc and it worked fine!!

They do argue and fight occasionally (they are now 15 & 13) but they always have each other,they share stuff and have never been bored.

Its hard work and expensive in the early days but I think its a great age gap.

We had a 3rd ds when ds1 was 7 and ds2 was 5 now that was easier bcos the older boys were able to do more for themselves but i do feel ds3 has always been 'babied' in a way ds1&2 werent.

Congratulations .

Thanks Joyay!
I am loving these stories, making me feel soooooooo much better!

22mths here with DD1 and DD2.

my best gap (have a 34mth gap, 17mth and 2yrs 2mths gap aswell).

they are very very close, and altho the first 6mths with both were hard, that was more because y expectation of going from 1 to 2 children were far far different than the reality.

I wish I had had the same gap with all of them TBH

24 months here - quite hard for the first year but they are thick as thieves now . Very, very close - play together and very affectionate and protective of each other (ds (7) and dd (5)).

Best of luck x

(and sorry about the name - I was on that manly name change thread )

23 months here. Now 3 and 1.

Definitely breastfeed if you can because it means that you can just get on with flying around after your toddler and the baby lugs along with a nappy in your handbag and not much else.

Neither of mine sleep but it's been okay because I suppose I never really got used to having a night's sleep before starting again. If you're up with one you may as well be up with two.

My only slight regret is that I felt that my eldest was still a baby when the new baby came and stole the limelight. I feel a bit guilty about silly things like her having to put her own shoes on and be responsible for choosing a toy to bring into the car because I was sorting out the baby. If she had been an only still I would have been doing things like that for her.

The good stuff though is very very good. They just adore each other. Ds (my youngest) might be a bit deprived when it comes to baby books and reams of photos of His First Everything, but he has something that makes up for all that a million times over - he has a big sister. The most common sound in our house is the children laughing. There was not even half this much laughter when we just had one - it was all a bit more serious and calm and sensible.

They are a similar size which is useful practically so one set of spare clothes will do for either of them and they can share car seats or high chairs or nappies or sun hats.

I'm going to have a 20 month gap between ds 2 + 3 in 3 weeks!!. I already have ds 1 who's 5.

Ds 1 + 2 sleep from 6pm - 6/7am

I am going to co-sleep with ds 3 to help me get as much sleep as possible. We did this with ds 2 and have a positive experience. It helped with b/f. I am going to use a sling (hugabug) with ds 3 so I am mobile to play with ds 2. I had severed PND with ds 1 and know that for me sleep is a key factor in my well being. We will introduce ds 3 to a bottle at 10pm as we did ds 2 in order for me to go to bed at 8pm (dh gets in at 7.30) and get some decent sleep till the 2am (ish) feed. This seems very regimental but it worked wonders for us and was only for a few weeks which compared to PND was fine. Dh is very supportive and we did talk about our plans and ideas before ds 2 arrived and I can honestly say we really enjoyed him and felt we were much better, calmer and happy parents to him.

Ds 2 isn't walking (no physical problem just very lazy ) so I do know that's going to be hard, it's hard now being 36 weeks pregnant (I'm having a c-section so are due a week earlier)

I am worried about b/f though as ds 1 got not jealous as such but didn't like it when I fed ds 2 and would go for a poo at that time, bounce on the sofa next to me, try to hug me round my neck etc etc. I tried the box of special books/toys but he didn't give a monkeys so I'm a little worried how it's going to work with a non-walking 20 month old. Also the summer hoildays will be tough but I will have help so I intend to make full use of that too!

A close friend has an 16 month gap and she has told me it's been very tough and getting out to chat to other mums has been the hardest bit as she's said she's been very lonely at times. I worry that b/f will mean I won't be going out much too...

I think the key thing is to talk about how you feel, how you're finding things and work with dh/p so you're both getting as much sleep as possible!

...also having slight panics about the family dynamics, ds 1 + 2 adore each other and don't want to upset the applecart.

Mine have two days short of 24 months bewtween them, and its fab, wouldn't change it for the world. The first 6 weeks were hard, but now both sleeping 12-14 hours at night, 2 in the day, and my 2 yr old loves her new brother. Was easier for her to adjust tho as son was prem so had 15 days in SCBU so she could visit before we brought him home.
I find it so much easier with two cuz I love being busy, so as long as you are organised its great. (I bottle fed both- but my eldest loves helping to give a bottle), and helps with nappy changes etc.
Dont worry, your going to love it!

muppetgirl wow 3 boys you will be busy! But your a pro already so don't worry - your be great!
Could you do some short nursery sessions over the summer to give you more time with your new son?

24 months between my 2.

Buy your first child a massive load of new toys. That's what I did, I found it great . They are 3.3 and 1.3 now and fine (apart from neither of them sleep!). My DS played with toys whilst I bf DD.

love the idea of lots of special presents from the new baby.

Did anyone move the oldest child to a bed to free up the cot?? Just wondering when to do this??

18 month gap here.

WE bought a cot bed when bubs was too old for the moses basket. Its just recently been turned into a bed with the baby in the cot.

We didn;t have any issues at all with the cot swop. In fact, our eldest was delighted with her new cot and the new springy mattress (great for bouncing on).

And I meant to say the age gap wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. I was fully expecting a nervous breakdown, but its been fine (except for the obvious exhaustion).

22 months between Ds2 and 3. V hard work at first, but they are great mates now (4 and 2) and they both idolise Ds1 (7).

Ds3 was unplanned so would not have chosen the small gap, but it is lovely to see how close they are now