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Parenting

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Original poster

if you completed your family with 2 dc of same sex....

14 replies

newmumof2 · 29/05/2009 13:34

do you have any regrets now that they are older (i.e. over baby/toddler stage) that you didn't go for the 3rd?

thanks

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BecauseImWorthIt · 29/05/2009 13:43

No. I had a MMC between my sons and I was terrified that it would happen again (didn't really enjoy second pregnancy because I was always fearful).

And both times I went into labour early, as my waters broke. 36 1/2 weeks with DS1 and 36 weeks with DS2. I was worried that it would be even earlier with a third.

And I was already 35 when I had DS2.

All in all, I felt that a 3rd was pushing my luck a bit!

Original poster

newmumof2 · 29/05/2009 14:29

sorry becauseimworthit you had worrying pregnancies, i also had a mmc between so know how you feel exactly!

if we decide and if we are fortunate to have another next year i'll be 39, after that who knows where my fertility be!

anyone else? i'm interested to know if we didnt that in 5 years time when i'm 43 and dc1 is 8 and dc2 is 6 i'll be wallowing in regret!

i know my gut says to go for it, but my dh is so stressed at work and 2 kids at home its non stop so he's fearful of the work involved with 3!!

OP posts:

RubberDuck · 29/05/2009 14:31

Sometimes I have a vague "oh wonder what it would have been like to have a girl as well" but I'm actually really glad we're out of the baby/toddler stage now - I enjoy being a mother of school age children and wouldn't want to go back to that. We made the right decision, imo.

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sassy · 29/05/2009 14:32

None whatsoever now. I would have dearly loved a 3rd child, my health wouldn't allow another pg. However, it was another baby I wanted, never felt the need for the other sex. And now they are 6 and 4 I feel no desire at all for another baby. I held a newborn yesterday, thought "aww", but that was it.

herbietea · 29/05/2009 14:34

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Tinker · 29/05/2009 14:36

No. But I was 40 when had my 2nd (after a mc) and knew I wouldn't have another (didn't want to) so not an issue I dwelt on. Was rather relieved I had another girl, have never wondered about having a boy since had my first. But am sure I would feel them same way if I'd had a boy first? Don't know. Aren't the chances higher that you'd get teh same sex again anyway?

I am that 3rd child though .

Tocca · 29/05/2009 14:48

No, I don't regret it at all. They are completely different and completely lovely. Is it about wanting 3, or a diff sex? If it is the gender I would be v cautious.

Ceebee74 · 29/05/2009 14:52

It is too early for me to regret it as DS2 is only 6 months old - but we have already decided that it is.

In my mind, I would need to want a 3rd child much more than I want a girl - otherwise you could end up very disappointed.

thefortbuilder · 29/05/2009 14:55

i had tough pg's with both ds's and would like another dc but the pg's were so difficult am not sure i would be able to deal with it again (severe pre eclampsia both times ds1 born at 32 weeks and ds2 born at 34 weeks both tiny and in scbu).

I'd love to have a girl but the chances are so small, I'd end up with 3 boys!!!

Smithagain · 29/05/2009 18:39

DDs are nearly 4 and nearly 7. So this September, both will be at school, DD1 will be going into Juniors. Definitely passed the baby/toddler stage and frankly I feel nothing but excitement! Feel like we've done that and it's time for a new phase. And they are very compatible, play together well on the whole, like the same things. The family definitely feels complete.

(DD2 was also a horrid, scary pregnancy, but that's not the overriding reason at all. I'd do it again if I really wanted to. But I don't.)

HecatesTwopenceworth · 29/05/2009 18:41

Nope. Who's to say no 3 would have been the other sex anyway?

You could end up with 20 that way!!

I'm glad I had 2 boys. Having seen girls the same age - I am grateful for my uncomplicated, unhormonal boys

eandh · 29/05/2009 18:44

no we always wanted 2 children had dd1 then 2 mc btween her and dd2 plus dd2 was a nightmare pregnancy with bleeding, low blood pressure, crap iron levels, hospital satys (which meant dd1 had to go to my parents etc)

Would have loved a boy and dh has always been keen to try for dc3 but dd1 and dd2 are bloody hard work I cna't imagine having the energy to put another child in that equation!

eandh · 29/05/2009 18:47

oh and mine are still quite young 4.8 aqnd 2.4 and I am 30 so in theory another would be possible!

Hecate girls are so much harder than boys (I'm dreading all the hormones and pmt to come yet!!)

GossipMonger · 29/05/2009 18:48

No not at all.

Feel my family is totally complete with my 2 lovely boys who are 4 and 7.

Odds would be against me having a girl anyway (not that I want a third!) as there are 9 grandchildren in the family and 8 of them are boys!!

Feel if you want a third you have to want a baby and not a girl or a boy.

Am 38 now and feel I am done and so does DH!

Plus the fact we are knackered and skint!

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