Advice pleas on how to discipline a boisterous two year-old boy!!

[Gateau]

Our DS is gorgeous - he looks very cherubic, but, boy is he lively - and very, very wilful!
By this I mean, lying on pavements if he doesn't get hiis own way, kicking if you life him, and running round supermarkets with his Dad chasing him (couldn;t get him into trolley. Sometimes it all just gets out of hand. To people, he must look like a spoilt brat and I really, really don't want him to be like that. NO amount of stern talking to him helps.
My family thinks a little tap on the hand would help solve the problem and so does my DH. But I am not so keen. Does anyone have any advice; seconddly does anyone do the tapping on hand things nowadays, and does it work?

I completely sympathise - DS1 has been like this for as long as I can remember!! He is now 2.11 and maybe (just maybe) getting slightly better but is still a complete handful!!

I am currently on maternity leave and have continued to send him to nursery 4 days a week (as if I was still at work) as he is like a walking timebomb otherwise - a lot of people have been about this decision but I know it is best for him (and DS2 as at least he doesn't get poked and prodded constantly gets some peace and quiet!)

I too am very of those parents with well-behaved obedient children!!

Oh and DS1 also looks like one of the most angelic children you will see - maybe there is a theme here On a plus point, he does enjoy going to the supermarket and sitting in the trolley!

I have no answers as we are still struggling to find a why to control him but we do use bribery a lot

My friend has two boys and two girls.
She says, in her opinion, boys are easy: just make sure they get plenty of exercise and food. She said girls are much harder work.

I hardly ever go shopping - everything online!

Don't think of it as a bribe - it is a reward. If you don't get the right behaviour - no reward.

As for other people watching - take no notice. Dd2 had a right royal strop in M&S the other day. The peak was in the queue in food dept when she shrieked "I want a cake and I want it now!". The woman behind me looked disgusted and said "well" under her breath. Other peoples' reactions makes me feel much calmer. I strapped her in the buggy and she screamed - I mean really screamed - until we got out the shop. I was perfectly calm, but the woman behind looked like she was going to explode!! There is nothing you can do at that point - they are beyond reason. She was asleep a few minutes later.

Personally my children have been at their most revolting as they turn 3 - dd2 3 in a few weeks. This is quite a good age as rewards will work. I don't think rewarding them for good behaviour (as I do with my puppy!) means they are reliant on that for ever. We did sticker charts when they first sat on the potty and my 11 year old manages to go to the loo without the reward sticker! It is a method to get to the good behaviour and then it naturally phases out - the good behaviour becomes the norm. Don't we all reward ourselves at some points - I'll have a huge cake when I've cleaned half the house etc..

I agree with your friend, though I'm sure it isn't catagorical. DD is always awkward and has an attitude whereas the boys just love me and love their dinners. They will be tucking in and she will look down her nose and poke the veg saying, 'so, I suppose you've decided to give me carrots even though you know I prefer peas' or something.

Not that she doens't love me of course, she just expresses it differently.

I do find bribes and rewards helpful now and then with toddlers though, even though people say bribery isn't good. There just are times when I need to do something and I'll get something delicious out of my bag and he'll sit in his pushchair and eat it.

If I were you, I would take a look at Toddler Taming by Dr Christopher Green. I think it is very pragmatic. As well as giving practical ideas, I also think it is good at suggesting what is reasonable to expect in terms of behaviour and impulsivity at various toddler ages.