DH says is ok to smack DS but not DD

[nomorechoc]

ok, so really dont want to bring up a full-on smacking debate BUT i am anti-smacking (smacked when child and had bad effect on me). I am of the positive parenting camp.
DH not really of the same view - says that boys need to be smacked; they are totally different to girls in what they repond to; says that animals in the wild get a 'nip' to keep them in line etc and that he would have run riot if he hadnt been smacked (he just means now and again). He says DS will walk all over me if i dont user 'stronger' disciplining methods, and that boys really need strong discipline, sometimes.
DS1 is boisterous and smart.
Now he has made me a bit unsure, as i didnt have brothers, and much as i know my DS at the moment maybe he has a point..
i dont have any DD by the way.

I think often you do have to take a different approach when disciplining one child than you do with another, as obviously what works with one may not work with another. But that doesn't necessarily mean smacking. If you are not comfortable with it (I am not either, due to my parents as well), then sit down and discuss it with your DH and come up with alternatives. I don't necessarily agree that it's to do with boy or girl either - just different kids sometimes require different approaches.

I just sat in a dentists waiting room listening to someone saying how it was important to discipline your children and how his sister told the 'authorities' to leave it to her to sort her own children out (one wonders if she ended up in court or, what they'd done). He ended it by saying 'but giving children a good hiding is the only way to teach them how to behave. I know you can't always with girls, but you have to with boys'. My son looked horrified.

Oh and I was far worse behaved and boisterous than my brother....

I think to base your method of discpline on the gender of your child is ludicrous!

The reason why I don't think that your dps method is correct (or will work) is because it is inconsistent, unfair and enforces gender stereotypes. It will cause resentment, heighten sibling rivalry and teach your son and daughte that the sexes should be treated differently. A bit old fashioned tbh. I would decide on a disciplinary programme between you and stick to it for them BOTH.
I do think different approaches work for different kids but I am def anti-smaking and if I were a boy I would think it was grossly unfair that I got smacked and my sister didn't.

I don't like the idea of smacking but i have to admit I have smacked my ds leg a couple of times, but very rarely and not hard. Can honestly say only about 4 times and he is eight years old.
Would ignore all that gender stereotypes stuff!! talking rubbish as usual.

My Mum and Dad managed to bring up my 3 brothers without every smacking. I would say my older brother was far more sensitive and less boisterous than me.

Have a dd and a ds, haven't felt the need to smack one more than the other; we've managed without smacking and they are now 9 and 12, so would be a bit late.

sorry: without ever smacking.

crap
i have 2 boys and do not smack them.

i don't give a shit what animals do. and there are other methods of teaching your child how to behave than hurting them.

i wonder then, is it ok for you to hit him if he does something you don't like?

what a load of bollocks your DH is talking.
So boys don't have feelings or emotions either do they?

DSS aged 12 never been smacked, absolutely never needed to. Not thtat there is ever a need.

DS2 is naughty and I probably would give him a smack if I thought smacking was a way to discipline.

So nothing to do with girl/boy but personality/situation/age/