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Parenting

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Original poster

Would you deliberately not have another (2nd) baby if you any had 2 bedrooms?

53 replies

GiraffeAHolic · 20/05/2009 15:02

We have a 14 month old dd and are ttc#2 (will probably take a while, dd took 2 years due to PCOS).

Trouble is we have just moved into a 2 bed house which we buy next March, we are planning to convert the loft when we can afford it.

Baby would obviously be in with us to begin with.

But it will probably mean that at some point dcs are going to have to share, probably more of an issue if dc2 turned out to be a boy.

Would this bother you? That new baby didn't have their own room? I was so excited about decorating dd's nursery first time round.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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FabulousBakerGirl · 20/05/2009 20:39

The size of my house has no bearing on how many children I have had.

You might get pregnant a lot quicker this time.

I would advise doing any work before the baby comes along as you might be a bit busy after....

LyraSilvertongue · 20/05/2009 20:42

DS2 is four and has only just got his own room. he was more than happy to share with his big brother before that but he loves having his own room now.

JamieJay · 20/05/2009 20:45

Wouldn't effect my decision at all, especially if you have the scope to convert the loft.

We're in a 2 bed house, ttc no 1 and won't be able to move for at least 5 years, during which time we will quite likely decide to ttc no 2.

To put it in context, my ex grew up in 3 bedroom house with his parents, 3 brothers and 3 sisters. The girls all shared a double bed well into their teens and the boys had 2 beds in their room and topped and tailed.

There are bigger things to fret about then the number of bedrooms

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arabicabean · 20/05/2009 20:45

It would influence my decision as I need the luxury of space.
I have one child and 5 bedrooms and for me this is about right. We only have one guest room and the others are changing rooms and a study.
Some people can manage with less space, but I can't.

thisisyesterday · 20/05/2009 20:47

wouldn't bother me at all.
my 2 share, and I am planning on chucking the next one in with them too (it will be in with us for some time though)

we have a third bedroom, but atm it's study/junk room and I don't have the time/inclination to do anything about it

MrsMerryHenry · 20/05/2009 21:08

I never had my own room till I was 18. I honestly think we Westerners are very spoiled, that we can afford to see a child having their own room as an essential.

I say go for it!

Original poster

GiraffeAHolic · 20/05/2009 23:27

Thanks for all your replies, way more than I expected we are definately going ahead with TTC. As far as the loft is concerned we can't convert until we buy it next march (rent to buy scheme). But eventually it'll mean an extra room.

OP posts:

Tinker · 20/05/2009 23:35

Wouldn't bother me with a such a small age gap. Lots of siblings prefer to share.

shinyshoes · 20/05/2009 23:36

I have 3 children in one room.

11, 8, 16 months

wotulookinat · 21/05/2009 00:27

It wouldn't bother me. I know a few people who have kiddies sharing a room and I think it's fine.

Jaquelinehyde · 21/05/2009 00:38

We have 2 bedrooms and already 3 children. Planning another one soon so I supose we will have to move then.

GoodGrrrlGoneBad · 21/05/2009 07:05

go for it. i've got 2 boys with a 16mth age gap. we've got 2 bedrooms, so they share. In about 5yrs or so we'll convert the loft, because i do feel it's important that have some private space as teenagers.

Plus i think it does them good to share - teaches them more.

Good luck with TTC
You can still decorate for a new baby anyway - you'll just have to be more creative!

nikki1978 · 21/05/2009 13:43

For the first 4 years of DD's life and first 18 months of DS's life we were in a one bedroom flat! Admittedly it was a big room and DD was in a bed in the corner and DS was in with us. Was fine and we lived with it

Now we have two bedrooms and the kids share with no problems. Maybe after the age of 9 or 10 they will need their own rooms but hopefully we will be a bit richer by then

wasabipeanut · 21/05/2009 13:45

I think it would be odd to postpone having a child for this reason. We have a 2 bed house and are trying for number 2.

Peachy · 21/05/2009 13:56

Me neitehr

DS3 was born when we had 2 bedroom place; ds4 is 13 months and I still haven't figured where he will sleep after I stop BF LOL

Ours all boys though

No chance of conversion even if we bought the palce as neighbour just had permission turned down (conservation area)

puppie · 21/05/2009 15:09

Sorry for the hijack GiraffAholic but I have been contemplating having another and we live in 2-bedroom flat. So my question to those who have done it is dont they wake each other up? Sleep is so precious (we can all relate I know!) I would worry that the baby (even at around 12months would wake up my DS (16 months) or vice versa. DS is often unwell with colds etc and is very unsettled when ill so wouldnt he wake the baby? I can envisage the two of them keeping each other awake and God forbid us getting EVEN LESS sleep than we already do.

mrsruffallo · 21/05/2009 15:10

I am shocked that anyone would even consider not having a baby because they won't have their own bedrooms.
Haven't most people shared with a sibling at some point?
It's fun

craftynclothy · 21/05/2009 15:21

We have 2 rooms and are expecting dc2. Luckily the scan showed it's another girl (so we can say how lovely it'll be that they can share and stop MIL moaning our house is too small )

Our neighbours had a loft conversion done after they had their 3rd and I think we'd consider it if we were to have a 3rd but would be difficult to find the money. Tbh I probably wouldn't have a 3rd if we couldn't do a loft conversion - not because of the sleeping/sharing a room thing but because of the general lack of living space.

mumeeee · 22/05/2009 16:33

No. All three of ny DD's shared a room until DD1 was 14. She could have had her own bedroom at 12 but she didn't want it.

Original poster

GiraffeAHolic · 23/05/2009 20:53

Thanks for all the replies. I'm sorry if I inadvertantly offended anyone, I didn't intend to.

Like I said I am a worrier and like to solve every conceivable issue in my head before I make a decision.

There will be a DC2 (do you hear that PCOS? you will not win ) and if worse comes to worse dp will just have to move into the shed

OP posts:

acebaby · 23/05/2009 22:21

We had DS2 when we were living in a 2 bedroom house with bedroom 1 too small for our bed and a full sized cot and bedroom 2 too small for a cot and a bed. Then DS2 was born almost 10lbs and too big for the little bassinet. We coped somehow (have now moved).

An aside - my sister has severe pcos and some endometriosis (no periods and needed IVF to conceive her first child). She conceived her second child within a month, even though she was still breastfeeding.

So go for it!

SOLOisMeredithGrey · 23/05/2009 22:29

I honestly don't think it's so much an issue with children of similar ages, even if they are different sexes. My Ds will be 11 this Summer and Dd is 2.5, so I think them sharing is a problem. Ds will be at secondary this year and will be buried in homework...and of course puberty , so them sharing is not a practical idea...Dd is still in a cot in my room, but is almost at the height that makes this awkward and uncomfortable for her. I desperately need a third bedroom and could extend if I had the money

Flibbertyjibbet · 23/05/2009 22:33

I have two boys 16m gap, when they came along we were in a 2 bed house and their bedroom was tiny, just fitted a cotbed and cot and nothing else!
They don't really wake each other up as the one who isn't crying etc usually sleeps through it all.
It can be a bit manic at bedtime when they encourage each other, but so worth it for the 'conversations' we have heard them having in bed.
We now live in a larger but still 2 bed house, they share a huge room now. They will still share even when we move to a bigger house in a few years as they are just used to it. Maybe when they are teenagers they'll want their own space.
They like sharing. I don't get this having to have own room. Sometimes friends with more bedrooms are quite strange the way they ask 'and do they share a bedroom?' as if we should be reported to social services for it.

expatinscotland · 23/05/2009 22:36

In most places in teh world, siblings share bedrooms.

Many of our parents shared all the way up till they left home.

And they're mostly happy, functional, well-adjusted people.

Sure, it'd be nice if all children in the world could have their own room after they hit puberty.

But it's a luxury, not a necessity.

It won't kill a person.

Phoenix4725 · 24/05/2009 09:02

i had 4 dc in 2 bedroom house .though do admit to being bit squashed.2 eldest ds shared room then had dd and ds in our room then in end we got bed sette so giving bit more room.

now got bigger houses but ds1 and 2 still share and always will have to .dd got roomand ds3 has ohis own cupboard bedroom,have justconverted diner room intomy bedroom .

butknow plenty friends has 2 bedrooms and 5dc other has 3 bedrooms and 5 dc

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