How do you deal with a 2 /3 year olds Tantrums

[LEMONADEGIRL]

Please can someone help me with tactics for my DS. I love him so much but am beginning to struggle with his tantrums and refusal to do anything I want.

When he is in that sort of mood he wont get dressed, brush teeth, put shoes on he will hide and run away put himself into a ball. If i try and make him he gets angry and upset he will then try and hit me etc.

I have tried different tactics, let him put his socks on, pick colour of t shirt. I have tried to play where DS hiding etc. Finally end up having to get phsical and holding him tight where my temper starts his gets worse and to my utter shame once or twice I have smacked him, then walked away feeling like the worst parent in the world and a bully.

I know he can't help it,I should know better.

I have tried naughty step - thinks it a game. Exluding him from room, usually thinks iit is a game. Stern talks and firm No.

Any advise would be welcome

i used to get dressed with my ds and say see who can get there top on first and then make a game of it with lots of praise i think they all go through this phase of wanting to be independent and do what the want to do

i also used to tell him and not ask him as asking him was giving him a choice and then i cant really force him to if he says no as i gave him that choice

so i was more firm put your top on then well done for listening good boy but he loved the beating mummy to get dressed and loved being the winner

i ignored any other behaviour and just started again when he calmed down the game worked though as no negativity to begin with just fun

dont be hard on yourself its a testing time just dont react and make it more fun if you can as it sticks if its negative it stays negative

I am quite lucky that my ds doesn't have many tantrums but when he does at home I take him to his room and close the door. I don't engage with him at all and he is not allowed out of his room until he has calmed down.

Thanks for all your replies

I forgot sometimes that he is only 2ish.

I guess giving choice isn't the best option. He can be so good I just need to keep my cool and relax sometimes. he just has a second sense for when it is a bad time.
Thanks

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