I just found my 6 yr old kissing my friend's 7 yr old son in bed???!!!

[FrenchmumOf3]

I feel so wierd, I had a friend over with her two kids (DD 6yrs old and DS 7 years old) and they disappeared off to their bedroom to play dressing up. We went up to get them (all three) for my friend to leave and caught my DD in bed with her son kissing! I have spoken to her since and she says jt was his idea...and why shouldn't I kiss him. I said she was far too young for that. Never expected to be put on the spot so early on...argh...now I feel I can't trust her to go and play at their house. I feel like my mum!!

erm...it's normal!

Normal, really? I didn't know how to react really. I guess I never knew what boys were until I was about 13!!

I have to emphasize the fact that my DD looked pretty red in the face with hair very messed up...not just a quick peck I don't think!

Well our DS2 (6.5 yr old)confessed to spending quite a lot of last summer at holiday camp kissing a girl of roughly the same age in a tent when they were supposed to be learning about camping. She is his girlfriend apparently.

DS1 also confessed to a smilar thing with a sligthtly older girl in a bedroom at our friends house - they were all supposed to be sleeping in the same room together as a sleepover treat.

I might have to put a stop to that if we go again but it is normal - I think.

Why did they look so guilty if it's normal??!! I guess I just didn't expect her to even think about kissing boys at age 6. Please reassure me that 6 year olds only kiss...Kissing I can handle!

Ok so I am feeling a bit better now knowing that two of you think it's normal...feeling less wierd about the whome thing! Thanks

Whole thing...

Well... a fried of mine had a foster brother who did similar things with her at a similar age and it really made her unhappy and left a lasting legacy, partly because her mum didn't take it seriously - I suppose you can't call it "abuse" as such as they don't understand it like that at that age, but it is possible for a child to make another child do something they don't want to. So I would talk to her and make sure she knows she doesn't have to do anything just because it's the other child's idea, and she can always tell you if she's uncomfortable. I would also actually say that proper kissing and having boyfriends etc is for grown-ups / older kids, but maybe I'm old fashioned.

No, I had a chat with her as soon as they'd left and told her that she was far too young to be kissing boys, but your point about telling her she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to is a good one. But I have to say she didn't seem to be too uncomfortable with the situation!

muffle - I agree. Sometimes I worry kids (and especially older ones) are under a lot of peer pressure.

Some kind understanding adult support is welcome and especially in making clear "you do not have to do anything you do not want" and "do not make someone do something they do not want" is a very sensible route to take.

It is something I intend to drum in to our DSs pretty soon. Even though they are under 10 at the moment.