Please tell me how I can stop my toddler scratching the car and being so naughty?

[JamesAndTheGiantBanana]

The weather is gorgeous, so I take my 20m toddler out to play in the garden and he's just so naughty - today he was so bad we've had to come in after 5 minutes, it took longer than that to put the sun lotion on for god's sake!

Within 5 mins he:

-Threw handfuls of gravel down the drain
-Threw builders sand everywhere in the shed
-Ate a lump of earth
-Picked up my handheld fork and ran up the garden with one of the prongs in his mouth
-Scratched the car with a handful of pebbles, and then best of all...
-Snapped the trim above the door handle on the car

I was gardening but I was also tempting him with garden toys and chatting with him, trying to get him to play in his car or bounce on his trampoline. (He has plenty of toys out there but ignores them in favour of being naughty)

Everytime he did something naughty I could see it about to happen, tried to distract him, then tried to get to him before it happened, then he'd run off laughing, and even when I tell him off or shout or even smack his hand he's just laughing or grinning at me. Then he just goes back and does it again.

If I ignore him he does it anyway and the car which we are about to sell is getting covered in scratches from him "drawing" on it with stones (half our garden is covered in gravel/pebbles so I can't get rid of them, and the drive is part of the garden so can't park the car elsewhere either)

After he snapped the door handle trim I've lost my temper and made him go inside, but he just trotted happily off and put the tv on. So now he's indoors watching cbeebies on a gorgeous day like this, and moreover so am I and I'm really cross with him. What am I doing wrong??????

Dont try and garden when he is around for now - actively play with him yourself, and if its going well sneak off to garden!

xx

turn off cbeebies

put him somewhere really really boring, play pen if you have one? and remove anything remotely fun

tell him and then let him yell for a bit

job done!

tell him why is what i meant to say

and then go back outside again!

How about offering some water/bubbles and various pots and paintbrushes. This keeps my toddler DD amused for hours (as long as I am somewhere in the vicinity). Chalks on the patio is another good one. Just dress them for messy play and expect them (and everything else) to get very wet.

Or build a den/big cardboard box/laundry basket that could be his own 'car'.

Sorry if I'm just suggesting things you have already tried. Have you spent any time with him at his level, letting him take the lead? This might help you see the garden from his perspective, and having a bit of mummy time might ward off the other attention seeking behaviours?

I do have a playpen, I could set it up in the garden next to where I'm gardening and use it as a time out area, and just pop it the shed when we're done but I'm not sure the neighbours would like hearing him screaming his temper away?

Thanks for the suggestions, lionstar. He's too little for blowing bubbles himself though he likes me doing it. Water play would probably be ok but he'd just pour it out and then splash in the puddle, and attempt to lick it up off the floor (he has to attempt to eat or drink everything at the moment, it's a nightmare with all the pebbles we have)

Paintbrushes etc would be used to scratch the car, as would chalks I think. Hmm, could try chalks though, as long as he didn't sit there munching them.

He has a cosy coupe car and a plastic house, a swing, slide, trampoline, various ride-ons, balls and buckets and spades etc - I don't know if boxes and baskets etc would help but I do have a big box I could stick out there for him.

Think I'll give him some lunch, get him off for a nap and try again later.

By bubbles I meant washing up liquid in some warm water . Drinking a bit of water/bubbles or eating a bit of chalk won't really hurt!

We have some plastic kiddy paintbrushes from ELC, I'm sure they wouldn't scratch paintwork. My DDs favourite outdoor activity is a small pot of water and a painbrush - she gors round and paints everything - even the cat. It's just water though, no damage done. If she gets wet we just change clothes later.

bowl of water and a paintbrush.

sandpit.

bubble machine.

he sounds bored.

he needs messy things to do.

We do want to get him a sandpit, he'd enjoy it. He does have a bubble machine and lots of messy toys. I don't mind him getting dirty but I do mind him scratching the car!

I do play with him, and give him things to do before I pick up my garden tools, and as I said, I do chat with him and encourage him to play with his toys while I'm doing stuff, but he will have to learn to play by himself too.