Do we or don't we say something?

[MistressSeuss]

If you were friends with someone, and were concerned by their health and their baby's, would you say something?

Even if it would sound like you were criticising them?

My baby friends have been really supportive, and picked up my PND and helped me through it, startiing with prising my son off me so he would play with the other babies - it was hard to take initially, but they were right and we are so much better for it in the long run - but I am beginning to avoid conversations with this other mum(as are others) because despite chats all together about similar problems we are afraid of upsetting her/ having her feel we were ganging up when really we are concerned as we spend most days with her, and can see problems?

We genuinely want to help.

What do you reckon?

MistressSeuss, fwiw I think you're a very caring and kind person. Keep an eye on your friend. She may not feel up to admitting there's anything wrong atm, but perhaps she will in time. Of course, there may not be anything wrong at all. She's lucky to have you all around anyway.

have to agree with the others that from what you've posted there doesn't appear to be a problem.
she sounds very like me with my kids. ds2 would definitely have fed that much in that time-scale lol

obviously you know her best, but that's my gut instinct based on what you've said.
If I was struggling, then yes, I would hope that good friends would talk to me and help me sort it out.
you do need to be careful how you go about it though, because criticising how she parents (ie the feeding etc) will not help and will make her feel worse.

so, by all means offer help/support, but please don't assume that she is unhappy with the way her baby is behaving, or with her strategies for dealing with it

Sounds like the baby is hungry. I could be controversial and say she might do herself a favour and start weaning the baby sooner rather than later, but I am not sure I have my flameproof clothing on.

If she does have post natal depression i think if you spoke to her you would be going about it all wrong. The way you have put it, you sound like you are just critisising her parenting techniques.

I don't really think its a friends place to ask if you have post natal depression unless you are best friends. I do think its your place to be supportive. You could talk in an off hand way about just how much better things have been since you recognised you had pnd. Maybe she knows she has it and is recieving treatment but doesn't want to bring it up.

You say in your OP that you are worried about the child but from what you have said i can see know cause for concern 7mo do not need to be social they need to form strong attachments to thir parents so as they feel secure. If there is genuine cause for concern, mention it to your HV.