Need some hints and tips with very aware 3 year old who won't ask for the potty!

[Blottedcopybook]

Argh!

My son has just turned three. He knows what the potty is for, he likes having big boy pants on but if I don't ask him every 15 minutes if he wants to pee he wets himself. He knows when he's dirty because he'll go and fetch a clean nappy and ask to be changed while it's still warm!

He goes to nursery two days a week and they've been amazing with him, keeping him trouser-less to encourage him to go to the loo but even they're saying he's showing no interest. He has never asked to go to the potty but does pee if he's prompted. We've managed a couple of days over 4 weeks where he's had only a few accidents, but we've also had a day where he'd peed in his pants 12 times by lunchtime!

It's possibly worth mentioning that he's a big drinker and I've tried only letting him have a drink with meals and snacks which is when we have best results but I don't really want to restrict his drinking just so he'll stop peeing!

Can anyone give me any help? His older brother toilet trained in three days and was no bother whatsoever. This is totally new to me!

I'm watching this one as well. My DD is exactly the same but 3yrs 5 months. Hopefully a magic answer is forthcoming....

Anyone?

I?m having similar issues with my little girl (she?s 3 end of March) She knows she ought to do it all on the potty, she knows the feeling of needing to go too, but we have real issues getting her to ask to go instead of just filling her knickers. We tried stickers, rewards, praise, books, talking about our own trips to the loo, showing her, explaining poo/wee is normal and not bad etc etc. We just go backwards and forwards, sometimes she gets it, mostly she doesn?t. And she really holds onto poos, straining to keep it in until she is almost constipated. If you ask her if she needs the potty while she?s clenching she just says ?No mummy, I?m fine? then does it in her knickers and doesn?t mention it.

The last few days we have had a breakthrough when we changed the language we use ? if she uses the potty/toilet we tell he she is ?very clever? instead of ?very good? and we praise her lots for trying. We also talked about her food going into her tummy and the stuff her body doesn?t need coming out when she has a poo ? it seemed to demystify it a bit and she enjoyed the story of the broccoli?s travels through her mouth, down her throat?etc etc. Another thing we did is, if we are out and it?s one of the rare occasions she tells us she needs to go, we calmly find a toilet instead of rushing to find one as quickly as possible. I think we were freaking her out with our mad rush to get there on time! The important thing is to praise the effort.

She is in nursery two days a week and I think this causes problems. They told me today that they ?popped a nappy on her? as they were going out for a walk and they didn?t want her to have an accident! Is it me or does this defeat the object? I am not happy!

Hope this might help slightly, look forward to seeing if anybody has any further advice!
Ali
x

Well I'm glad it's not just me! I've just had to endure a half hour long conversation with my Mother about how we were all potty trained by 18 months (bollocks, methinks) and how I'm making a rod for my own back and how I'll have my work cut out for me with three in nappies when I have the baby in May and how I'm clearly the WORST MUM EVER for not having nailed this potty training thing.

You know the worst of it? I gave DS a row today for pooing in his nappy minutes after I asked him if he needed. Poor soul, he clearly doesn't get it yet and I'm making him feel bad because other folk are getting on at me with his training schedule

My Wee Friend! It's amazing! Really encourages then to ask for the potty!

My Wee Friend

We had the health visitor out to give us tips as DD is regressing, we will ask if she wants to use the toilet, she says no, then 2 minutes later has wet herself, but without pants on she is fine. Here is the list of what she suggested doing, there may be something in there that you could do.

Rule out a UTI

Have a fixed time for drinks during the day (esp if they are at nursery and have fixed time there) and then after 20 minutes start asking if they wnat to have a wee.

She also gave DD a reward sticker chart but to be honest I am not to sure that one will work.

If they have a favourite book take that with them and read on the potty/toilet.

If they use a toilet then make sure that their feet are resting on something as that relaxes the bladder and will make sure that it is emptied.

And if all else fails, take their pants away and put back in nappies, explain why and use peer pressure.