is one bath a week enough for a 4 year old?

[traceface]

My dd1 used to have a bath 3 or 4 mornings a week when she was at nursery. She loves a long soak and a play. Since starting school we don't have time in the mornings and she's never really liked baths before bed, so now she just gets a bath on a weekend. Is this really gross and neglectful of me?

I don't think that a bedtime routine is control freakery for a small child, it makes them feel very secure.

You can have a perfectly good bedtime routine that doesn't include a bath, though. I'm not a great fan of routines in the sense of always doing everything at a set time whether the child is ready for whatever it is or not, but I'm a big fan of consistency, including a set pattern of events that help a child to wind down for sleep.

Exactly, Horton, they weren't set in stone, but it was consistent and it helped them wind down to sleep-we didn't have all the problems that some people seem to have with staying in bed and having to do controlled crying. Sometimes a bath got missed, if other things were happening, but on the whole they had one most nights. It was one of the best parts of the day for all of us.

DD goes through phases of liking and hating baths. When she likes them we do have one most nights but at the moment she loathes them with a passion so once or twice a week is all we can manage. I don't think it's doing her any harm, even if she is a bit grubby, but I do think it would do her harm to be upset by the bathing thing every night for no real reason.

If they don't like it I would only do it if necessary but, if they love it and it works into a routine that suits everyone I wouldn't say that it was controlling. Also mine were mucky by the end of a day, they didn't like showers and it was a bit much to tackle with a flannel.

we do baths on wednesdays and sundays, its very hard to find time when my two are in bed by 6.30pm-7pm every night. Monday is ballet, tuesday is childminders till 6, weds is art club, thursday is street dancing and our church meeting and friday is free, but normally relaxing. Kids dont sweat like adults do. Some weeks they do only get one bath a week. My kids are never smelly! And I work with kids and I can only ever smell the very nelglected ones, mainly because of the clothes smelling, and matted hair.

Both my girls have ecemza so not allowed to bath my girls too often. Used to do every night with dd1

I remember my mum watching a mindee of 5 who was bullied at school for smelling and she really DID smell. Her mum said she only got a bath and hair wash every sunday. The parents both had good jobs and a nice house (clean inside, mother very houseproud so you would have thought they'd clean their child ) eventually my mum had to say something to the parents as the child was really unhappy about the bullying. They switched to another childminder, they weren't happy with the advice.

Buy one of these baby support things and bathe them together in the same bath?

it doesn't dry some peoples' skin out.

brits do have a rep for not washing enough in other countries.

I bath my DDs (2 and 4) every night, but then they LOVE their bath, splashing and playing together and get grumpy if I leave it out for some reason (e.g. if we're late home), so obviously that makes it easier. I find it impossible to imagine bathing DD1 (aged 4 like your DD) just once a week - but then DD1 has an amazing knack of getting absolutey filthy, she is so enthusiastic about everything and always in the thick of things getting as grubby as it's possible for a small person to be. Maybe if she wasn't like that I wouldn't be so shocked at the idea of a once a week bath...... After all, I only wash her hair once a week (it's down to her hips and an unruly mass of curls - takes forever to wash and dry and I just can't face doing it more than that!). You know your child best, but once a week does seem a little too little - surely you could fit in an extra mid week bath?

As an Aussie, this thread and the one about wearing the same clothes 3 days running have really made me laugh

That and the houses with no showers in them make me laugh, Astrophe.

That and the houses with no showers in them make me laugh, Astrophe.

(and the wee teeny fridges and washing machines under the kitchen bench - But I do miss it a lot now I'm gone )

Yes, no utility rooms. They always trot out the 'small island' excuse, even though many countries in mainland Europe are most densely populated.

Tom (almost 3) has always had a bath twice a week. If he was really grubby now, we'd stick him in the shower quick, as he loves it.

Up until I was 13/14 I only had a bath/washed my hair once a week on a wednesday. I wanted out asap as Doogie Howser was on, lol.

I give my 2 boys (4 and 3) a bath every night. It's part of the bed time routine and it doesn't take long. Ds2 has a tendency to very dry skin but I don't use any product other than paraben free soap and he's fine (we have eczema in our family). I shower every day and couldn't bear not to tbh. Ugh.

Expat-very few countries in Mainland Europe are more densely populated than the UK. In fact only Belgium.

Our ds+dd shower every day or bath once or twice per week. As a child my mother told me to get in the blooby bath one sunday, I did as I was told and got out 5mins later. At no time did she stipulate to fill the bath with water...

Yet when I lived in Belgium, mixer taps and showers were everwhere.

jajas, I love you poms, truly I do Just funny the way we do things differently is all - I'm sure there are many things you found weird about Australia! (heck, there are lots of things I find weird about Australia!)

(Expat - YES! Mixer Taps! Where are they? And what's with the carpet in bathrooms?? Eewww!)

Underfloor heating was invented some years ago so that it's possible to have floor covering other than minging, filthy, unhygenic, naff carpet.

Oz sounds like my kind of place!

I love BBQing and smoking foods outside, too. Much better than formal, poncy dinner parties.