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Parenting

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Original poster

2.8 yr old boy still pooing in pants....any help please....PLEASE!!!!

21 replies

luckymummy74 · 14/03/2009 13:18

Posting on behalf of a friend who is here with me today. She started potty training her DS, aged 2.8yrs 3 weeks ago. He's doing 90% of wees on the potty but holding onto poos, or doing them in his pants. Has only once done a poo on the loo. She (friend) has read all the books but is at her wits end....anyone else experienced this and got any tips??

He says 'it's disgusting' ??? even though this has NEVER been implied at home.

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LackaDAISYcal · 14/03/2009 13:21

quite common ime, and perhaps a sign that he isn't quite ready for potty training?

nappyaddict · 14/03/2009 13:23

Probaby not ready yet. 2.8 is still quite early for potty training.

Original poster

luckymummy74 · 14/03/2009 13:39

even though he has got it with wees? Seems a shame to put him back in nappies when he is doign so well with wees, IYSWIM

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Clayhead · 14/03/2009 13:40

Personally don't find it that early (I help in a pre-school where children start at 2.9 yrs and the vast majority are potty trained).

Anyway, my ds did this for a while but then just seemed to grow out of it. Sorry not much help and I do remember how hideous it seemed at the time! The only thing I do remember is that we just stuck with what we were doing and didn't go back to nappies. HTH

Original poster

luckymummy74 · 14/03/2009 13:40

I personally wouldn't have said 2.8 yrs is early for potty training....I think 1 year or 18 months is early. Not nearly 3????

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Coldtits · 14/03/2009 13:51

Ds1 and ds2 both did this.

Original poster

luckymummy74 · 14/03/2009 13:52

any tips coldtits....I may have some for you....wear a bra .......(to warm your tits up)

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snickersnack · 14/03/2009 14:01

Naked from the waist down all day every day until she cracked it was what worked for us in the end. Given the choice between the potty and the floor, she just seemed to get it. It was summer though...

seeker · 14/03/2009 14:02

My ds did this for ages - he was dry for AGES but would only poo in a nappy. He told me when he needed a poo - I put a nappy on him, he pooed. No problem. He grew out of it. I tried to make him use the potty for poos and he just got horrendously constipated.

Original poster

luckymummy74 · 14/03/2009 14:05

Thanks all. My friend has just gone home. I tried to reassure her it's very common and the best thing for her to do is to try and not stress (checked the archive for similar threads).

Easy for me to say as my DD1 potty trained in 1 week (GF method!!) and it was summer and we did as you suggest snicker, naked from waist down. It worked a treat.

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rookiemater · 14/03/2009 14:06

Seeker this is what DS does.

I'm not particularly bothered as he is only just toilet trained at the grand old age of 2.11 , but I'm assuming he will stop wanting the nappy at some stage.

squeaver · 14/03/2009 14:09

We had six months of this - at that age - with dd.

Bribery. Withhold all treats (no biscuits, no sweets, whatever constitutes a treat for him) and make it quite clear that the only way he will get a treat is if he does a poo in the toilet.

Do not make a big fuss when he poos his pants just keep repeating the mantra: "that's a shame because you'd get a chocolate button if you did it in the toilet". Also if he asks for a treat, say "when you do a poo in the toilet you'll get one".

It may take a while (2 weeks for us) but stick with it and it will work out.

Also, do a search on here - this is a very very common problem and there are LOADS of threads on it.

seeker · 14/03/2009 14:11

Ds was probably 3.5 when he stopped (but he was pretty late with the pees as well.) It changed when we were on holiday. We were in the pool, he needed a poo. I said "Well, we can go up to the room for a nappy which will take ages or just nip to the loo and be back in the pool in no time.' He chose the loo, and never wore a nappy in the daytime again.

seeker · 14/03/2009 14:12

squeaver, if we had done that with ds he would have been constantly constipated and miserable. He was when we tried it!

rookiemater · 14/03/2009 14:17

Oh good I will go with your approach seeker.

Lazy parenting seemed to work quite well with the peeing and we have had hardly any accidents, so a few months of carrying a spare nappy won't kill us. Sounds rather better than 6 months of witholding treats dependant on pooing in the toilet !

seeker · 14/03/2009 14:31

Lazy wins for me every time. But when it comes to nappies, I really think that there is nothing you can do to hurry it. You could spend ages with stickers and things and he's get it in 4 months - or you could just leave it....and he's get it in 4 months!

Interestingly, ds would only sit on the loo if I was holding him for some time after he did start using it - so may he was just scared.

nappyaddict · 14/03/2009 18:41

There are many at DS preschool who are just training at 3 - 3.6 years.

zazizoma · 14/03/2009 23:01

Same issue as you with my DS, now just over 3. I don't think not doing poos in the potty is a sign of not being ready for the potty at all, especially as wees are going well. And I strongly recommend not going back to nappies full time, it would be such a step back for what he's already accomplished. And this issue seems to be very common with boys.
My son is dry, even at night, but poos are traumatic for everyone. I believe DS is scared, so we try not to make a big deal. We tell him he can poo anywhere (except our bed) and he sometimes goes in his shorts, or on the floor, or in the potty, but too many days pass with no action even with this permission for my and his comfort. I like seeker's advice about putting her son in a nappy for poos, and will offer that to DS tomorrow.
Perhaps we just suffer through.

Twinklemegan · 14/03/2009 23:17

Well DS is 2.7 and we're getting nowhere fast, so I'd advise your friend not to worry - because I'm sure trying not to worry! It's far too cold here, even in summer, to do the strip to the waist down method, so we're just hoping he'll get the idea eventually.

livysmum · 15/03/2009 01:13

Hey my 2.6 year old DD is gowing through this too.

We've been training for 2 weeks now and has done 3 poos potty. Everytime she tpoos in pants I say thats yucky, eww so gross and walk with her to the potty and as I'm putting Poo in the potty I'm telling her "this is where poo goes, not in pants, in potty" and she repeats me. She seems to slowy be getting it. She used to say "mommy got to potty now" and we'd sit down adn she'd get up straight away and I just figured she wanted my attention but she really did have to poo so now that shes REALLY used to doing wee on potty i make sure she sits for a while.

I dont think he's too young and I wouldnt put him back in nappies...whata waste of all your hard work. I've read its common
Read this
pediatrics.about.com/od/weeklyquestion/a/04_potty_bms.htm
also just goole "how to get child to poo in potty" plenty other opions come up

mybabywakesupsinging · 15/03/2009 01:32

7 months of this with ds1. Adamant he would wear pants, but would not poo in the toilet/potty.
Just had to wait until he felt ready. Was very happy when he did, though.
Naked didn't work for us as he was happy to poo on the floor. Bribery didn't wotk either.
Once we knew he could use the toilet he was given a new book for every clean day, them later every clean and dry day.
We now have 50 Thomas Train books and however many Little Miss and Little Mr there are. It took a LONG time.

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