Hey, SomeMightSay, you're doing amazing.
I was just talking to you the other day when you were asking people whether they use a naughty step.
Sounds like you've had fab advice from everyone on here. You've had a really tough time and, as someone said, you've probably just had the toughest 6 weeks of your life.
Everything's hit you together and it's totally normal to feel as you do. When I read your first post under your alias, I thought I've had many a day when I could have written every word. Every single word - nobody phones, etc, etc.
Your 19 month old is just hitting that really bad age too. I've just been through it with DS, who's 2.1 now. He's actually starting to come out of it a bit now as he's starting to reach an age when he can express himself a bit, and he can understand verbal commands.
Forget the stress of the naughty step for a start! I think. I found it stressful enough when DD was 3 and even now she's 4. I know people swear by it, and I know kids need to be taught etc, but, as someone said earlier - this isn't about being the perfect mum - it's about survival! You'll have time for stuff like that later. I'm only just starting to try to discipline DS. Up until now I've just used removal, restraint, distraction, etc, etc.
We go to the local zoo every year and watch their bird show. They get a parrot to do tricks and, every year, the presenter tells you that a parrot has roughly the intellect of a 3yo! That always put it into perspective for me!!!!!! You've got enough to deal with at the moment.
DP sounds less than helpful. Sometimes blokes just don't realise how upset you are unless they actually see you tying yourself to the railway tracks! Try to explain to him how desperate you are.
I would mention it to the doc. I really would. Be careful with the Prozac - personally, I wouldn't take it (and I have been there and avoided it). My sis-in-law is on it and thinks they should put it in the water, but a friend took it and it made him loads loads worse.
Exercise is supposed to be as good as meds, and I think it might help DS to burn off some energy too. As people have said, pram, pushchair, baby carrier, reins, whatever. Wrap up warm and get yourselves out for a gentle walk or down to the playground. It's free and DS will enjoy it more than things you need cash for. I had a BabyBjorn baby carrier and I liked that. Maybe you could pick one up cheap on Ebay? I still take DS everywhere in the puschair even though other mums seem to have their 2yo's loose - just because it's so much less stressful and safer - so I'd put my money on baby carrier and pushcair. That should give you some stress-free time when both are safe, happy and restrained, while you get some fresh air and exercise. Then DS can have a blow off when you reach somewhere safe like the park or the playground.
Again, this is survival! As a person whose kids were going to live on organic brocolli, only play with wooden toys, never be left in front of the telly, never eat junk food and do arts and crafts all day (before I'd had them, that is! What planet was I on?) never feel guilty about sitting DS in front of CBeebies with a bag of crisps! And only iron the essentials.
Tesco online for your shopping. Deffo. I started when I had no. 2. I'd never go back. And you can save loads that way too, not only by being more organised, but by using the money off codes on hotukdeals.com etc.
We swear by acidophilus too - expensive but much better value than the drinks. I used to give the kids Solgar ABCDophilus powder when they had tummy upsets and I gave it to DH throughout his mega-antibiotics for pneumonia last year (don't feel sorry for him - you wouldn't believe how he got it!)
Hey, it'll never, ever be as tough as this again. I had a friend who said to me, when I was having a crisis, 'It won't always be dark at 7'. Bit twee, but I got a lot of comfort out of the inevitability of 'lighter nights' ahead.