Has your mother/father told you that *you* are a good parent?

[MinnieMummy]

It only occurred to me today when having a conversation with my grandmother where she told me that I am a lovely mother, the DCs are wonderful, well-looked after, etc. and I told her that it meant a lot to me for her to say that (which it does) that actually my mum has never said anything like that to me. Eldest child is 2.4.

This makes me feel a bit sad. I would say I have an ok-to-good relationship with my mum, not great, and she's not a very emotional touchy-feely sentimental person AT ALL, but... hmmm.

So does your mum say it to you??

btw I don't mean it in a boasting 'I am a fantastic mother' type of way, but sometimes it's nice to have a bit of validation that you are doing ok at this whole parenting lark, so I do appreciate my nan saying I'm not completely screwing them up. Yet.

MIL has never said that we are good parents.

My Mum says it quite alot, I find it very hard not to make a snide remark about the fact that I am using her parenting as a model of what not to do

She has actually, which was really nice. She used to be really dictatorial about my parenting choices, hated me breastfeeding, really undermined it, demanded I feed DD baby rice at 4 months to get her to sleep (I didn't ), was very skeptical about BLW, she even through a hissy fit about not getting a choice in naming the baby. But she now says that I am a good mum and I think she realises that I have made some good decisions, and well, even if I haven't it's nothing to do with her. I try and ask her advice a bit more now, just to show that I appreciate what she has to say, and I think that has mellowed her a bit.

All the gps in our family (we are lucky to have 5!) make it abundantly clear how very much they love our children and we are very touched and grateful for that.

Once or twice they have commented on us "doing a great job" and it is lovely to hear.

I must remember this when I am moaning about them and their various foibles/funny little ways to dh.

Mum told me I would be a good parent, just before she died, I was a new mother.

er, no, I don't think my mum or dad has said that. I don't care one way or another. I know they care for me and their grandchildren.

I know I'm a good parent

And I woud curl with embarrassment if they were to say it. Not what we do

my Mum did comment to a friend of mine "she's better than we thought she'd be" about my parenting skills....if that counts

Yes my Mum has told me several times that 'I am a great wee Mum' it does mean an awful lot to hear it from your own Mum - makes you feel proud and all warm and gooey It would never cross my Dads' mind to day something like that.

my nan said it to me a lot

yes
regularly

Not explicitly, no. My mother did tell me when dd was 6 months that she took back any comments she'd made about exclusive bfing for that long (she genuinely didn't understand it) and said she was wrong, dd was thriving and she could see the benefits in dd's health and happiness. That meant an awful lot.

MIL tells me all the time. And she tells dh. She texts, emails and phones and always says lovely things about my parenting. My BIL phoned last week to chat to me and said dd was a credit to her excellent mother. That was just lovely.

My Dad has told me several times that he is impressed at how well I cope. My DDs aren't the best sleepers and are quite shouty and I don't think that he thinks that he would be able to keep his temper day in and day out! My FIL has told me that he thinks that I am doing the best for our DDs and that I'm doing a good job.

I can't remember specific occasions when my Mum or MIL have said anything. Hm, actually my Mum comments on specific things, but not on my general performance - things like teaching my DD1 to play independently. I think that both of them generally approve though.

My mother is very supportive in how I bring up the children, so while I'm not sure if she has explicitly said I'm 'good', I don't need her to say it.
But my father said it when dd was just a couple of months old and ds was 3.10 yrs and that really meant alot to me.

Not sure what MIL thinks. She spends alot of time telling me what she thinks I should do, and how her friends' children bring up their kids.

She has this week actually and it made me cry - she told me my boys have been a credit to my and DH's parenting.

I have spent a week in hospital and she has been looking after them a lot and when I came home she told me. Infact MIL did too (which nearly floored both me and DH) and also my BF did too.

I have been a very proud mummy this week, as they are no means practiacally perfect in everyway , they are boysress boys

When I was pregnant with ds1, I was 22, living with my parents, and they were furious. SO furious they threw me out (unfortunately it was the year of the huge housing boom in this area)

I was lucky to be housed in a nice little council flat, in a block of elderly people. I loved that flat.

Anyway, my parents didn't visit much after I had ds1, they had thir own marriage issues and mum was very poorly having had a breakdown. But I visited them sometimes, and I will never forget that on one occasion, when ds1 was about 6 weeks old, I sobbed on my mother about being a shit other because I'd let him get too hot or some such nonsense. And she stared at me incredulously and said "Bloody Hell, child, it's a good job you don't remember being a baby if you think YOU'RE such a shit parent. You're a million times better than I ever thought you would be!"

My sister tells me regularly that dad is always telling people what a great mother I am (which is strange because he treats me like a feeble minded child)

My mum (who is wonderful) constantly says what a lovely boy DS is and how well-balanced and happy he is.

I said last week that we were lucky. She said yes, but we were also doing a really good job with him.

It meant a lot

My mum has never said it to me. In general, making negative comments comes much more naturally to her than making positive ones. She has said that dd is very happy and content but I'm not sure whether she attributes any of that to me and DH.

My dad and step mum wax lyrical about what a great dad dh is but again, have never said anything about me

Saying that, I'm not sure I've ever mentioned to them what great grandparents they are.

MIL has complimented our parenting a lot though.

My mum and my grandma(different side) have. was very [shocked] as we're quite a "buttoned up" family, and it really means a lot about my grandma as i really look up to her

No.

She has told me that I have lovely children. But then again she has also told me that I have naughty children.

Other people have told me that our children are wonderful and they we've done a good job.

My mum is always saying it to me.

My dad is a man of few words, but I know I get his approval

My fil frequently tells me how very proud he is that his grandchildren have such a good mum!!

In fact on mothers day last year he sent me some beautiful flowers from my sons .

My mum often says it.

When my dd was a few months old my dad said "I am amazed that you are such a good mother".

Didn't really know how to take that!