trying to do dry nights - please help!

[jujumaman]

DD1 is just four and my mil is outraged and has been for about a year that she's still in nappies at night.

She was slow to potty train in the day, got her out of nappies just before 3 and she still often has accidents - mainly out of laziness

Dh is determined to get her out of nappies at night not least because mil is coming to stay next week . Last night we gave her no drinks after 6pm, left the nappy off, lifted her at 10pm - and she wet the bed twice in the night.

Should we even be bothering? Given how slow she was to get daytime dryness, I don't think she's ready for nights yet, despite her advanced age , and I don't fancy months of waking up to change sheets twice a night. But dh says we've got to stick with it and she'll eventually get it. Ironically, mil is the first person who'll moan if her nights are disturbed while she's staying with constant wet beds. Mnnetters, please advise me.

4 isnt an advanced age to still be in night nappies - it isnt considered a problem till the age of 7/8. If you are lifting and she is still wetting then she isnt ready to do a full night without weeing. They need to produce a hormone that suppresses urine production while they are asleep so until the hormone is there you will just be causing yourself (and your lo) extra work and aggro. If your dh is so determined to get her out of nappies at night then leave him to change the bed every time she wets and he may soon change his mind and stick with nappies for a little longer.

She won't eventually 'get it' until she's making the chemical that reduced urine production at night - can't remember the name of it, but am assuming another MNer will be along soon. Look up the biology and point your DH at it - science is very persuasive...

Vasopressin is the hormone and your dh and mil are talking bollocks.

My daughter is under the care of a doctor for constipation and during a recent conversation she told me that it would not be considered a problem until a child was 7/8 and still weeing the bed- until that happens, then just let her wear a nappy in bed
What on earth is the harm?

And tell mil to keep out of it

this link may help explain a bit better

Aw, thanks everybody - that's brilliant to know

Sounds like it's best just to leave it and try again in three months.

I am going to make a deal with dh - we'll give it a week, after that if he wants to persist he can do all nights and wash all sheets.

MIL will have to live with it

Really, until the night nappies are still dry by the morning there is little point in stopping wearing them. And also until dd can wake up herself before she wets and use toilet or potty. I think mil would benefit from reading up to date reports about night wetting, as she is showing herself up by her ignorance. There is a tendency for late night dryness to run in families, I wonder how soon mil was dry at night herself! Chances are she was punished for wetting the bed after a certain age, so is rather unforgiving of her granddaughter being allowed to 'get away' with wetting because you have a different approach.

You will all have to wait for the hormone to kick in and reduce the amount of urine dd produces during the night. It is worth noting that making sure a child is well hydrated during the day if you are going to limit fluids in the run up to bedtime, and some drinks like cola, fizzy drinks including water, blackcurrant squash, hot chocolate and milk late in the day can over stimulate urine production in some children.

I left my DD in night time nappies until she told me she didn't want to wear them. Her morning nappies had been dry for some time, but I didn't want either of us stressing about it. She was probably about age 4.5? NEVER had a wet bed.