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Giving up work to be a SAHM - terrified

10 replies

LauraKiora · 20/02/2009 19:13

I'm terrified about being a SAHM. Until now DH & T both worked PT & shared child care, Now he's going back to work FT. It was a joint decision for me to give up work but that doesn't make it any less scary!!!

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compo · 20/02/2009 19:14

It is very scary
I had to timtetable things to do each day and stick to a routine otherwise I found myself floundering
Good luck though try to have fun!

foxinsocks · 20/02/2009 19:17

don't be scared

think how much tv you can watch. I always caught up with my sky+ing and now it sits in one huge list. Is v disappointing.

and how when it's sunny you can GO OUT and enjoy it

it will be marvellous I'm sure

LauraKiora · 20/02/2009 19:22

thanks - this was my 1st mumsnet post so dead chuffed i got any replies.

Getting very behind on my 'Larkrise' so will be watching that - I am a 85year old woman hiding in a young woman's body.

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foxinsocks · 20/02/2009 19:25

lol

I sometimes think that too.

About 5 years ago, I used to take the piss when I heard people watched Midsomer Murders. Now I feel a tinge of excitement when I see it's on.

nickytwotimes · 20/02/2009 19:26

It is nice when the days are sunny and you can be out and about instead of stuck in the office/shop/whatever.
It is also nice becasue when you are having a bad day or are sick or ahve been up half the night, you can lounge around a bit and just supervise and feed and water them.
Change is always scary, but you will do fine!

Rubysmom08 · 20/02/2009 19:30

You'll be fine! I am a SAHM and although I have my moments I feel my dd is getting the best from me as I had quite a stressful job before I had her and used to struggle to let it go at the end of the day, not compatible to parenting really.

Get out and about EVERY DAY. Get ready out of your PJs everyday and socialise at your playgroups etc and you'll love it. My dd has a class everyday which helps break up the monotony of me and just me alone, altho she is going to have a little sister to occupy her soon!

Niecie · 20/02/2009 19:36

No, don't be scared - it is liberating. No more conforming to somebody else's timetable, no more commuting and no more being answerable to somebody else. Your time is your own (subject to the routine of your DC of course). If you are worried about money then you need to sort that out first of all but a joint pot and sharing everything works for us and means no rows on divving up who pays for what.

It does help to get a routine and get out of the house at least once a day, even if it is only a trip to the shops but you get to chose what you do and if you can't be bothered you don't have to go! You may also find you get some 'me' time to take up a new hobby or start a course. There is a world of possibilities.

Good luck!

LauraKiora · 20/02/2009 19:41

The hardest bit will be re-establishing a routine. dh has been redundant, and therefore cluttering up the house, since xmas, and as i only work pt now it has been like a very long lazy holiday.

Most nervous that kids will not want to be with me as they are used to being with dh 2 days a week while i work. Oh and that after too much baby talk my brain might melt and start to dribble out of my ears.

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Fizzylemonade · 20/02/2009 20:53

I am a sahm and to begin with it wasn't by choice, but I accepted the role I was offered and now I love it!

I only had ds1 at the time, he was 16 months. Now he is almost 6 and I have ds2 who is almost 3.

Some days (like a job) are better than others. I find a bit of a routine helps me and ds2. We have the school run to do anyway.

Getting out and about is a good idea, and socialising with other adults. To begin with the only conversations I had (because we moved 100 miles away due to dh's work) were with checkout people

Soon investigated local goings on, made some lovely friends, and do get together with a few other Mums although we refuse to use the words "coffee morning"

Sort out your finances because that was a worry for me, even though it has always been our money I still felt weird not contributing financially. Am way past that now.

And in summer when you are playing in the sandpit making sandcastles, or you are out in the garden and your child has their paints out, or you make lego cars/planes/trucks, do nature walks, eat the ice lollies you made etc you can think of all those people stuck in an office somewhere with no air con. Works for me

I love having a bath in the middle of the day with ds2, making his hair into all different styles with shampoo, ah tis great stuff.

TooMuchTV · 20/02/2009 21:25

I've just resigned my part time job to be a sahm now I have 2 dcs (looking to go back to work once they are both at school). Was very apprehensive even though I know that going back would have been stressful and exhausting. Now the decision has been made I am actually more relaxed and looking forward to the next few years. I like quite a structured day so will be trying to plan in plenty of outings and activities

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