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Parenting

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Original poster

When to stop bathing with members of the opposite sex?

20 replies

KingCanuteIAm · 17/02/2009 10:27

I would really like to know your experiences, I am asking as I have young children who have made no move to change this and I am wondering if I should!
Also I don't really see this as being an issue and I am wondering if I am odd

At what age did you children stop bathing with opposite sex siblings?

Who initiated that? Was it you or the older/younger boy/girl?

Why did you/they want it to stop?

Did you/they agree with the reasons above?

I really appreciate any input, thank you!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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mankyscotslass · 17/02/2009 10:30

I stopped bathing DD with eldest DS when she was 2 and he was 3, but only because he got distressed when she pulled his willy hard. .

She thought it looked very strange.

If that hadn't happend I suppose I would have stipped when one or the other became uncomfortable with it.

mankyscotslass · 17/02/2009 10:31

stopped

Coldtits · 17/02/2009 10:34

i kicked off when I was 8 or 9 about bathing with my younger brother. Mostly because he was 3 or 4 and had become aware that I was different, and was asking questions.

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titchy · 17/02/2009 10:44

My 2 are 10 and 8 and still sometimes share baths - not that they would dare admit it to their friends! And they go to the loo in front of each other. Ds (younger) well aware that his sister is developing but doesn't really comment. TBH if they're comfortable so are w, although we're quite a nudey family.

Original poster

KingCanuteIAm · 17/02/2009 11:20

Mankyscotslass, that ought to do it

So 7 and 4 is not too bad then?

Previously we have only had same sex sharers so this particular one is a new one to me

I do like that fact that my dcs are aware of differences and just take them in their stride. We are a fairly open family too.

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TsarChasm · 17/02/2009 11:29

Dts (boy and girl) are 7 and still share.

They don't mind too much but occasionally complain about there not being much room. We've had a couple of incidents of people not being too careful about where they put their feet.

I do feel they could do with not sharing so often now. I also have another dd who is 10. She point blank won't share with anyone (well sometimes she will but she moans a LOT)

The problem is that 3 separate baths just go on and on and on and there's not enough hot water either.

lisalisa · 17/02/2009 11:32

Tsarchasm - I hate the separate baths issue too - you've hit nail on head - the baths just do go on and bloody on!!!!

But the mess they make when they bathe together - oh lordy!! Mine are 3,5 and 7 and have been known to flood the kitchen if I've left them alone for more than 2 minutes.

mankyscotslass · 17/02/2009 11:35

I have to say though, the kids are still not really aware of nudity, we are all comfortable with each others bodies at the moment.

I'm sure this will change as they get older, but at the moment it's not an issue at all for us. They are all now 6, 5, and 3.

seeker · 17/02/2009 11:39

We're a pretty "nudy" family, and sometimes my 13 year old dd lets her 7 year old brother get into her bath still. It gives her the excuse she needs to play with the bath toys! Can't see the problem, myself!

francagoestohollywood · 17/02/2009 11:42

Mine are 6 and a half and 4 and a half and are bathing together. They are still fine about sharing and actually have lots of fun playing together in the bath.

TsarChasm · 17/02/2009 11:52

Yes I agree no-one minds the modesty factor.

Hell I gave up any hope of that myself years ago. There are too many of us to care. It's just everyone wanting 'their own' that means the subject comes up.

That and the fact that we're at the stage where they just don't fit together in the bath anymore.

Aargh!

I should just hose them down in the garden.

serenity · 17/02/2009 12:00

DS2 and DD were still sharing at 7 and 4, but DS2 prefers showers now so that's what put an end to it. None of them are that bothered modestywise.

Blondeshavemorefun · 17/02/2009 12:13

think when the older child wants some privacy - normally seems to be about 8 or so, but varies

if all are happy to share then dont see the problem

Original poster

KingCanuteIAm · 17/02/2009 12:17

I don't mind with the older ones as they sort themselves out, run their own baths, tidy up after etc. Mostly they have showers now anyway. I just started to get worried about the non-same-sex sharing when it became obvious that other parents do not do this. I don't think of it as a problem but then I also won't mention it to others IYSWIM.

You are all right though, going back to bath times that require my involvement for more than half an evening is not high on my to do list

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Tamarto · 17/02/2009 12:19

DS2 6 and DD 4 share sometimes, but DS2 has excema and so usually has oilatum in his bath which is a nightmare with DDs hair, so it's not very often. DS1 decided a while ago that he wasn't happy sharing any more and i am happy to go along with it he is 10 this year and i was just amazed that he was fine with it for so long

With the baths going on forever thing, if one doesn't want to share then they have to take turns in the shower suits DS1 fine he prefers them now!

GooseyLoosey · 17/02/2009 12:21

5 and 4 and always share and have never shown any desire not to. As long as they are happy, it will continue.

BarefootShirl · 17/02/2009 12:21

DD 9 and DS 7 still often share a bath, especially if we are short of time. Both also regularly come into the bathroom to use the toilet (or just for a chat - oh for some "me time"!) when I am having a bath. Neither of them would give each others nudity a second thought but, as with Titchy and Seeker, we are very much a nudey family - especially me .

motherlovebone · 17/02/2009 12:28

i remember sharing baths with my big sis and young bro age 9,7 and 5! i think we probably outgrew the bath!

Original poster

KingCanuteIAm · 17/02/2009 13:10

Thank you everyone, you have put my mind at ease! I was beginning to think I was setting them up for permanent psychological scarring

I was an only child so I have nothing to compare it to really!

OP posts:

PrettyCandles · 17/02/2009 15:06

Mine are 8 (boy), 6 (girl), 2 (boy). We generally tub them all together, and they know that if any water comes out of the bath then the bath is over for that child. Ie, no splashing or you get whipped straight out of the bath.

Ds1 sometimes showers himself in the ensuite because the bath was getting a bit crowded, and ds2 hadn't yet learned 'manners'. There was a bit of highly unwelcome willy-yanking! But he has improved, and although ds1 likes the sense of seniority he gets by washing himself on his own, he also likes the fun of the group bath.

His hair is very long, so he still has hairwahsing with the others.

We dont' want to end up with 3 separate bathtimes and bath sessions - far too much hassle. But if it continues to work out this way, with the choice being made by the child as they get old enough to sort themselves out, then we're happy to go with the flow.

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