Basically, my friend works part-time but struggles in the school holidays as she doesn't have any family support nearby. She asked me last year if I could help out at all with childcare, so I agreed to 1 + a half days a week in school holidays, which I've been doing for the last year.
Her dc's are 9 + 5, + on the face of it seem lovely. All pleases, thank you's + smiles. Problem is they're actually naughty, but in an underhand way.
For instance, I set the children up with paints in the Xmas hols one day, made sure they had aprons on + table was covered. I left them for only 5 mins to answer phone + my friend's 9 year old had managed to get paint on her clothes, stained my table + got some on the carpet (in a different room)! I felt under pressure to get her clothes clean + dry before her mum got here which I just managed. Her 5 year old brother had got bored in that time + managed to tip out a whole box of train track, throwing each piece across the room, under tables, everywhere!
In the summer I decided to take them all to the park. Anyway, in the few minutes I went inside to pack up drinks + snacks, the 9 year old had decided to turn our garden hose on, got completely soaked which delayed us as I had to dig out some of my dd's clothes for her + put her clothes in the drier. Did tell her off this time, but she turned on the tears making out she'd turned the hose on by accident!
Other things she's done include:-
putting my dd's pet rabbit down very suddenly + walking off, (we do allow the dc's to bring the rabbit in sometimes), so the rabbit scuttled under a very heavy piece of furniture + was a nightmare to free him, (needless to say my two dc's were in tears), but I managed.
drawing patterns all over my ds's wooden garage, (this was right at the end of the day when their mum came, we were chatting in the kitchen at the time, first time I'd let the children out of my sight all day!!)
I made it clear I wasn't happy but she turned on the tears again (in front of her mum), saying it was all my dd's idea + she wouldn't have done it if my dd hadn't started herself! (My dc's don't draw on any toys/furniture, wouldn't even think of it!)
This girl's younger brother has been better up to now, but the last few times I've realised he waits until his mum + me are chatting + puts something in his pocket, a lego toy or something! I noticed this last time + asked for it back, the second time my dd ended up chasing him up the drive because she said she saw him pocket a pad of stickers from her collection, (she was right, he had!) His mum told him off but dismissed it as (playing)!
Trouble is we've been friends for years, she gives examples of all these other mums who in her opinion let their kids (run riot!), + sees herself as being the strictest, fairest parent ever! She does come over quite strict with her two, but I just can't see why they act like they do!
My dd likes to play with this girl, but can't see that she's not as genuine as she seems. At her own house + at school both these children seem as if butter wouldn't melt, but as soon as their mum's not there they're terrible! I can see their mum looking at me quizzically when she comes to collect them + it's chaos, but it never is usually, just when her two are here!
At some point I've got to have a chat with her + just say I don't want to have her kids anymore, I do worry about our friendship but I hate this impacting on our school holidays! They're here now, my dh is in the garden with all 4 of them, (said he'd have them for an hour before I persuade them indoors to watch a video (quietly, hopefully!!)
Anybody got any ideas how I broach this with my friend? She's already asking about the easter hols but I've been very non-committal!