How much do you 'scare' your kids?

[PlumBumMum]

My dd nearly 8 seen a picture of Madeline in the paper, she asked me was she still missing,
I said yes, to which she asked how did she go missing, I was pretty vague with her at the actual time it happened
So I decided to tell her the truth, being very clear that me and dad would never leave dcs on own
She asked why someone would take her, I think I gave a good explaination and went on about stranger danger etc

But how much do you 'scare' your kids to make sure they know if they were in danger?

I think mine are pretty safe as they are still to young to not be with me or dh,

but when I was about 8 and my dad brought me to the park and he had to go to the toilet he left me outside to wait on him and a man tried to take me by the hand I just froze, thankfully he just walked away as there were to many people about, but I didnt scream etc

I think you have to tread a fine line, depending to an extent on how timid or adventurous your child is. With a naturally timid child, I'd concentrate on "practical plans for if you get separated from me", but one more likely to run off woud maybe need a little bit of "scariness" to act as a reminder IYSWIM. I think even quite small children can understand that there are "bad people" and to know what they should or shouldn't do - I can certainly remember being told about "not accepting lifts" and "not going to see puppies or kittens" and "not accepting sweeties". By the time I was about 8 there were high-profile missing children cases, so we were aware that children could go missing, and that was something to be aware of but not terrified by. We still walked to school, went to the shops and the park, etc. We didn't live our lives in fear.

I've went with the don't believe anybody if they say they are bringing you to mummy/daddy, sweets, bunnies, no secrets if someone tells them something bad will happen to mummy daddy etc,

I suppose I'm just hoping I've done enough and don't want to scare her, shes never to far from me anyway

You might find this article interesting
here

I think the idea of good secrets/bad secrets is a good one - good secrets about birthday presents etc, bad secrets if it makes you worried, or someone might get hurt.

And agreeing what to do if they get separated from you, or you're not there to collect them when expected - eg go back into school to let teacher know.

I think it is a good idea to explain what they have to do in a certain situation without scaring them witless by going into too much detail. They need to know that they can't go with strangers, they don't need to know every single detail of what a stranger might do to them.