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Original poster

Mums who are Adopted

30 replies

hsanders · 05/04/2005 21:44

Hi there,

Just curious as I am adopted and am feeling very emotional at the fact that my nine week old DS is my only blood relative I know, who I can touch and kiss...and look at and think 'he has my eyes or my lips!'

Just wondered if other Mums who are adopted have had these feelings?

When people say my DS has amazingly blue eyes, it makes my well up [even if it's someone in the street or supermarket!] I feel like I could break down sometimes.

Would love to hear from other Mums in the same situation.

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Jayzmummy · 06/04/2005 16:47

Thanks for your replies....hope you didnt mind me crashing in on the thread!!!!

Ds1 is 11 and is desperate for a baby sister....Ds2 has autism and as far as he is concerned anything new coming into the house, be it a cardboard box or a baby, is his!!!!!

Seriously thinking about extending our family and after 11 years of boys toys I really would like to have a few girlie things around.....

We have been very open with both boys about their natural parents and I have regular letter box contact with birth mom.....if and when the guys want to meet up with her I would be very supportive....after all she sacrificed the greatest gift so I could be a mum....I owe her my life.

lilibet · 06/04/2005 16:59

I was adopted at 6 weeks and I have a joke with dd, now 16, that if I ever need a kidney she is my only hope!

I still don't wnat to trace my birth mother - my real mum is 78 and i think it would really upset her and make her feel second best which she never will be.

The looks thing is strange dd and ds2 both look like me and ds1 is like his dad, but it would be strange seeing an 'older' me somewhere!

roisin · 08/04/2005 18:57

As some of you know I had a baby adopted at birth 15.5 years ago. My dream is that one day he will choose to make contact with me.

I recently read Nicky Campbell's autobiography: Blue Eyed Son , which I found fascinating.

Interested in this thread?

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jofeb04 · 09/04/2005 11:28

Im going through these feelings now. My ds is 13 months, and like many of you is my only blood relative i know.
I was in the process of looking for my real mother, thinking how could she do this to me etc, what with all the feelings any mother as for the child.
I talked it over with my parents who give me information about her and the circumstances etc she was in at the time.
I'm no longer looking for her at this time, she was young when she has me to a married man etc, but i might do as i start to get older. Im 23 now, and feel that i need to be 100% sure of doing the right thing, for me, not just for the feelings that i had IYKWIM

KristinaM · 09/04/2005 11:40

I was adopted like many of you when I was a baby and I'm also an adoptive mother and a step mother as well as having bio kids. Sounds a bit confusing I know but its just a normal family from where i sit!!

I noticed that quite a few of you have traced a little then stopped. Just wanted to say that's fine - you need to take things at a pace that suits you. Dont feel bad. Many adoption journeys take years and you will know when you have the space and emotional energy to deal with it.

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