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Parenting

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Original poster

Is this normal or am I a terrible mother?

35 replies

elliederby · 25/01/2009 12:31

Is it normal to be bored and frustrated with a 3 month dd? I try to entertain her but think I will go mad if I have to play 'this little piggy' or sing nursery rhymes one more time. The whole thing just seems unrelenting - change, feed, play, try to get her to sleep - then do it all again!! I knew having a dc would be hard work but was not prepared for this. I was looking forward to doing fun things together but it all just seems like boring hard work with little reward. I do enjoy playing with her when she is in a good mood but find it so hard to know what she wants when she gets cranky. I know I sound like a moany old cow and should be grateful to have a lovely dd but just don't feel it. Does it get better? Is there something wrong with me?

OP posts:

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bluebump · 25/01/2009 20:46

You are not alone! Funnily enough your post mentioned Bounce and Rhyme at your local library so I just googled my local library and they do it too so I may have to be brave and go along! Half of my problem is I am really pathetic about not wanting to go to a mother and baby group on my own and now my friends are starting to go back to work i'm getting bored of being at home all the time on my own with my DS even if we go for a walk every day. I will be back at work before I know it and i'll regret not doing anything!

StayFrosty · 25/01/2009 20:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

saggyhairyarse · 25/01/2009 21:48

At 3 months I don't think you have to play with her all the time paranoid

I think it is a good time to go to places you want to go (museums, shopping, coffee with friends, where ever) as she will be happy to see the world. It won't be long before she won't sit still so make the most of it!

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Original poster

elliederby · 26/01/2009 12:05

Thanks for all your great suggestions and thank goodness for mumsnet!! Its great to know I am not alone in feeling like this and that things will get better/easier.

We are off to check out nurseries later for when I go back to work in Sept. Another minefield but hopefully we will find something we like.

OP posts:

Mummyfor3 · 26/01/2009 12:09

It is normal, and you are a good mother for recognizing your feelings!

DS1 almost did my nut in: 1st baby, screamed A LOT, no family support (he is now almost 6 and still a panic merchant ). It was the combination of tedium, being bored and stressed at the same time that got to me.

Agree with all of the above. Get out of the house! For me main purpose of mother and toddler group was to find people in same boat to moan with!

Oh, and it DOES get better, so much better, do not let anybody tell you otherwise.

treehugga · 27/01/2009 10:41

Hurrah for this post. It was exactly what I needed to read too. My DD is 5 months and the last month has been a lot better than the first 4, but have had a few days of total tedium as have been stuck indoors waiting in for boiler to be fixed (plumber not turning up & no hot water) and am now more or less going bananas. LO having to entertain herself on the floor most of the day as I can only really manage about an hour of nursery rhymes and there's no bath time to look forward to either! Poor thing must be bored stiff too and I am feeling totally guilty for my lack of motivation to give her good quality entertainment. Only source of hope is that she will surely eventually master the rolling over thing with so much floor time. God it's painful to watch her get half way EVERY time!

littlefrog · 27/01/2009 11:30

oh dear, i never tried to entertain my pfb, i just fed him and then stuck him on the floor to look at things while I made cakes or read a book or chatted to people. Did carry him in a sling all the time though, which he loved, and we were out a lot (doing adult things - no need for baby entertainment when they're so small, imo!)
i reckon lying on the floor and trying to roll over is entertainment enough!

MamacitaGordita · 27/01/2009 12:18

Great thread- very reassuring! It's tricky sometimes (I have a 3mo too, plus have just moved to the country, where there are no trains and I don't drive ) and that's a good point about doing things you like. And after all these posts about slings I think I may invest in one, as busses + great hulking pram = tears (from me as well as DS!)

Mummyfor3 · 27/01/2009 14:20

Yes, some means of comfortable babywearing defo a good idea: they love it and you can do things.
Much as I struggled a lot with DS1, DS2 arrived 1 year and 10days later , so cannot ALL have been bad. AND...DS3 now 10 months old.
Everything mummy does is endlessly interesting and much as I do think it is important to talk to LOs, it is ok for it to be inane stuff: "Right, mummy is now putting the kettle on, see, and this is the tin with the chocolate biscuits..." . Anything like that is better for their social/language/emotional development than Cartoon Network.
And, hey, learning how to roll over, that is very exciting!! Lots of floor time is v v good. But still, don't you hate it when plumber does not turn up when he said he would, my sympathies!

nappyaddict · 27/01/2009 14:26

I must admit I found it all a bit boring until DS was moving around. The best thing for me was to get out and go to lots of activities - baby massage, baby swimming, baby signing, NCT coffee mornings etc. Did you go to ante-natal classes? You could get in touch with your classmates and arrange coffee mornings at each others houses?

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