How to avoid shouting at 3 year old dd? Help desperately needed, please ...

[queribus]

I think I've become the parent from hell. Every day seems to begin and end with a shouting match between me and my 3 year old DD

She's recently become very cheeky and rude, talking back to me and DH - she said she'd hit me this morning if I chose some socks for her! Her nursery key worker reckons her behaviour is normal and that she's just pushing boundaries, but I'm finding it nearly impossible to just ignore. It just really winds me up and then I end up shouting (or yelling) at her.

I really hate being a 'shouty mum'. Has anyone else had this cheeky back chat in a 3 year old? How did you manage? Should I just ignore?

Thanks!!

Lots of cheeky back chat. Didn't mind that so much. What got to me was the whingeing... Three was the hardest age with both of mine.

Yes. Forget the terrible twos, it's the threes that really got to me. You're not the parent from hell, it's just a really awkward phase. They're nicer when they're 4.

With both of mine (DS & DD) but more so with DD.

It was never as bad when we were outside?! The warmer weather coming should herald more time in the great outdoors for you and she'll grow out of it (a bit!) by the end of summer.

I think a lot of it is down to frustrations at their own limitations and not having the verbal skills to communicate it in a better way.

Also, little children can just be arsey little buggers!

Don't shout back if you can help it - you'll spirral it.

I too slip into shouty mum mode and hate it. DD is nearly four now and just coming through it. Oh and the whingeing - arrrghhh...

I find ignoring to be the best solution - she's trying to get a response and soon will stop when she finds nothing works.

I just walk away from her if she's starting to push it - pick your battles!

Agree with what others say about picking battles. My 3 year old ds is really pushing boundaries now, and being destructive of personal property to get a reaction. Yesterday, he pooed on the floor!

I have to put him in his room now or I would explode (and I am normally a calm person) He knows how to push my buttons!

I keep hoping 4 will be better, only another 9 months!! I do empathise with you op!

Thanks for the quick replies. I need to learn to walk away and ignore, I think. I don't mind the whingeing too much.

Flippin' 'eck - the 'terrible twos' was a breeze compared to this, and I've got it all to look forward to again with DS (6 months).

Thanks again!

My ds has taken to yelling at me and hitting me when I am picking dd up from school! he is never like it at home and I am guessing by 3:00 he is tired so is narky!

its horrible for me as I know what all the other mums think and tut if they hear you shouting at your child! ... well I don't shout but hold his hands and say don't hit mummy, I try and block them all out and remain calm and talk to him properly! but when he keeps doing it and doing it I feel like crying sometimes!! I used to think I was such a good mum but now am not so sure! esp if a 3 year old can nearly reduce me to tears in public

Any help on hitting you when u say no and checking bk with loud voice x