DD 2.7 can use the potty and loo but utterly and totally refuses to give up her nappy

[MissM]

I've posted on here before but am trying again as I'm really tearing my hair out. DD has been able and willing to use the toilet since she was just 2. I was very slow to actually take her out of nappies though as we were on the verge of moving and everyone said it would be the wrong time. But now, even though she will do a wee in the potty when she's running around starkers before her bath, she has a screaming tantrum if I try to put anything other than a nappy on her. I've held out but after 20 minutes of utter hell we had to get to nursery and I didn't want to make the situation any more stressful so I gave in.

I know she can use the potty, she knows she can, we have knickers that she chose, stickers, I ask her if she needs to wee etc. etc. etc. But none of the books tell you what to do if a child simply refuses to stop wearing nappies. I know I'm the adult and I'm tempted to force her, but don't want to create more problems than need be.

Anyone have any suggestions please?!

Why not just let her carry on wearing nappies until she feels ready? She's still quite young.

The other possibility (which worked with my dd) is to buy her some pants with her favourite character on - it was Dora the Explorer that did the job for my dd.

My dd was 2, My ds was 3 and some, don't feel pressured by age, think Kathy is right maybe leave it!
DD2 now 2.2 and def not ready, and I'll prob wait until summer to try unless she indicates otherwise

She'll give them up voluntarily eventually.

I'm in a similar situation. Dd is 2.8 and completely capable of wearing knickers, having no accidents, remembering to go to the loo etc. She just doesn't want to. I've let her choose not to for months, but recently I casually suggested that as soon as she decides she doesn't want to wear nappies any more we could maybe buy her a scooter... and she's not worn a nappy for nearly a week!

Not my preferred method of parenting tbh, but meh, I was getting fed up with having 2 children in nappies when one so blatently doesn't really need to be.

and have you built up the whole 'big girl pants' thing? admired some together in a shop? mentioned that some big girl she likes wears them?

We chose Night Garden knickers together cos she loves it so much, but it still didn't do it for her. The thing is she is able to do it when she's naked, and the times I've managed to avoid putting a nappy on by distracting her she has told me when she needs to do a wee. She just seems to have created this huge issue around stopping wearing nappies, and I'm worried that it's becoming a control thing.

I'm starting to feel completely inadequate -I keep reading about and meeting people whose kids seem to have been trained by about 2 and am worried that I've missed the boat and it'll be years!

Just seen your message Alice. Now there's a thought....! We bought her a scooter for Christmas, but I'm sure there's something else as covetable!

Am also fed up with having two in nappies, especially as I know she doesn't need to be.

seriously MissM? oh no no no. 2.7 is not old at all by today's standards though earlier generations used to do it earlier because laundry was such a faff in those days.
No evidence that there's a window of opportunity, I don't think.

A friend of mine told her dd she could only wear them until she was 3 and it worked for them.

Don't get caught up on age a friend of mine insisted on potty training her dd by 2 and thought I was mad for leaving my ds of same age, but her dd is still wear bedtime pants 3 years on! I don't know who decided 2 was the magic number

It's a good point, as I have American friends who were astounded that I was beginning so early. One of them has a three year old who is only just trained and only because she had such bad nappy rash they had to leave it off. I need to talk to different friends!

Just out of interest though, any theories as to why she gets so upset about taking her nappy off? And any solutions to it? I'm doing the non-confrontational approach at the moment, but when it's falling down her legs I have to literally manhandle her on to the changing mat.

Not sure although I do think they all go through a stage when don't want nappy off dd2 has started this even when it is so obviously stinky!! and I have to fight with her, still wouldn't worry about age

Thanks for reassurance guys. Perhaps I should just hold off and let her find her own way a bit more.